my father left when i was 1 yrs old and we keep in touch alot and my mom and him are cool now and stuff, but i only see him once a year in the summer and he wants me to live with him for my junior year of highschool and i really wanna get to kno him and my other lil brother, but my mom is taking the longest time deciding if i can go. she said that she wants to make sure i go to church and keep god in my life b/c my dad walked away from god but my dad likes that i go to church, and we keep tellin her ill go to church but besides the religion she wuld say yes, i tried everything we talk all the time about it and she has to make a desicion real soo b/c skool starts soon. WHAT SHOULD I DO!!!!!! I NEED HELP ON HOW TO CONVINCE HER THIS IS GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-07-10 09:43:45 · 19 answers · asked by Missy 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Explain calmly, that you will go to church even if you have to drag your dad with you, or you can just keep asking her to let you go
2006-07-10 09:48:24 · answer #1 · answered by acestuff2002 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even though I am in Canada, I think that the solution will be the same. The best option would be to go to a Family Mediator. Family Mediators work with all the people involved in the issue to come to a mutual agreement. They will even draw up legal agreements that will help everyone to feel comfortable with how everything is going to work. For example, there could be a stipulation about regular church attendance.
Good Luck :)
2006-07-10 16:51:19 · answer #2 · answered by Loulabelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're going to be graduating in less than 2 years. If you were going to go away to college, you wouldn't have your mother there. She needs to trust that she raised you right and believe that you will keep on the path she's helped you to choose in your life.
If you've told her that you will continue going to church and will keep God in your life, then you need to stick to that. Don't give her a reason not to trust you in that respect.
You deserve a chance to get to know your father. Maybe your dad walked away from God once, in your mother's eyes, but you could be the one to help him find his way back again.
2006-07-10 16:51:09 · answer #3 · answered by justanotherunknown 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's clear from you question, that Mom's done a pretty good job. Assuming the worst at your Dad's, can't you just go back home to your Mom's? If it comes down to it, why not have the clergyman at the church by your dad give your mom a call so she can be comfortable that you still have local moral guidance?
2006-07-10 16:50:55 · answer #4 · answered by Brand X 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, she just doesn't want any hurt or pain in your life. She has spent all these years protecting you and she can't do it (she feels) if you are away from her. Tell her to pray about it and that you are too. Tell her that you want the opportunity to know where and who you came from and decide on your own who your father is, as well as your brother. You have every right to know him like any other siblings your mom may have had. Good luck and God Bless
2006-07-10 16:50:44 · answer #5 · answered by kendraplattinum 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell her that your not a baby anymore.
Sit her down, and tell her that you seriously want to talk to your dad, and meet new people, see new things.
Even though your father walked away from god, he still goes to church (correct?) so convince her you will go to Church with him.
Tell her that you don't think its fair that you can't see your one and only, irreplaceable, father, and that its not fair you can't, because she won't let you.
Try to say what you feel, in the nicest way, and make the best compromise you can. Hopefully you'll get to see your father. Good luck!
2006-07-10 16:49:29 · answer #6 · answered by ♫ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In some states, once you reach a certain age, it is the choice of the child which parent they choose to live with. You should be able to check with DHS on that issue without causing too much grief....it could turn out the decision isn't your mother's to make.
It sounds like your mom may be holding out as she doesn't want to lose you, that's never an easy decision for a parent so be patient with her.
2006-07-10 16:51:54 · answer #7 · answered by IndecisiveProcrastinator 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I let my 17 year old go to live with her Mom but I'm making my 15 year old stay. She hasn't helped in any way (the Mom) to help me raise them. I did it on my own. I still let her go so she could see her Mom the last year of her childhood. I told her that the door was always open for her to come back to her real home. But she has to learn for herself and if I didnt' let her go, she would never know.
2006-07-10 16:50:41 · answer #8 · answered by madbaldscotsman 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to realize that you are her child. She's not just going to shove you out the door and say "see ya!" Sure he's your dad, but he wasn't around all that much when you were growing up. She has had to raise you on her own and she's afraid to let go of you. More than likely she's also afraid of you favoring him over you. Let her take her time. Don't pressure her, because it'll just make things worse. Whatever decision she makes, you need to respect it. She's your mom and she knows what's best.
2006-07-10 16:48:30 · answer #9 · answered by youdontknowme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hes ur father she cant stop u from going to live with him. cause he has the right no matter what even if he did walk out on u and ur mom its not her just her choice its urs and ur fathers also. but explan to her how u can get ur dad back into church and how does she know he walked away from god jsut cause he left her. that dont mean jack
2006-07-10 16:51:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way to convince a parent that a choice is a good choice is to tell her that she raised you to be a strong, kind, and religious young woman. Tell her that your faith in God will not be waivered by moving with your father, instead it would be strengthened by moving with him. Since he chose to walk away from church, by you being there with him will influence him to become stronger in his religous.
2006-07-10 16:52:15 · answer #11 · answered by Glam mama 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋