I have fallen for my best freind,we have been pals for well over a year talking an texting everyday ,but deep down I suspect he sees us just as we are friends and only freinds,I have hinted at my feelings but dont exactly have the courage to say exactly what I think and feel.I was away for a few days last week an I dint text him much I asked how he was last night an he replied sayin he thought I was on holidays I told him how I had met an ex of mine while away an he said he didnt care anymore that why had I left him alone that everyone alwasy leaves him alone.I told him I hadnt left that I was just protecting myself and that he left me alone a lot and well to cut a long story short he text me this morning sayin "wakey,wakey time for work,an it wasnt fair havin to work when he was so tired etc"I am at a loss I dont know what is happening r what to do.I am 35 he is 34 I am sort of shy an not very confident he on the other hand has women who approach him on regular occasions.Please help
2006-07-10 07:32:51 · 17 answers · asked by bermur 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
XXXXXXXXXXXXx speak up before someone else does XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
2006-07-10 07:35:53 · answer #1 · answered by asoldierswife 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You two are in your THIRTIES and you are playing these little games ? STOP! You two should have a good enough friendship by now to stop playing "Hide-and-Seek." You go off on a short "holiday" and when you return he chastises you for "leaving" him alone - and then you two get into a not-so-clear discussion about protecting yourself !
Yikes! Is it very fun there behind that wall of protection ? Isn't it kinda lonely ? What is going to happen if you say nothing ? Well, the wall will still be there, yes, but you will still be alone and won't know what's goin' on with your friend there. What will happen if you come out from behind that wall and dive right in ? Do you think you are going to die from shyness ? Nope, I guarantee you will not die. AND you at least have a chance of getting something on track with the guy (if that is what you want.)
Tell him! If you can't bring yourself to look him in the eye and tell them, then write him. (Although I suggest talking - it is always better in the long run.) Tell him EXACTLY how you feel so that there is no question....no mincing of words, no giving yourself an escape route, - dive right in. The water will either be just fine or you will climb out and be free to find some water that is just fine for you.
2006-07-10 07:40:07 · answer #2 · answered by two 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Youre both mature adults so you can talk to eachother about this. I know love is not easy whatever age you are but you should let him know how you feel straight out - be open and honest. Or you could be subtle and drop a few hints (thing is men arent that good at taking hints so u have to be direct with them!).
You seem to have a good relationship - the communication is there with the texting. Go for it and talk to him! Its better than contantly thinking about what hes feeling/what hes not feeling..etc..Get it off your chest! Good Luck and Take Care :)
2006-07-10 07:41:16 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get this off your chest by telling him how you feel if he says no then at least you know his definite answer if he says yes then bonus.
I would never advise going out with a guy friend as if you break up you have lost a boyfriend and a friend if you have been attracted to him since you first met then obviously deep inside you never considered him a friend only a guy you know and want to be with. If he does reject you then at least you will be able to move on with your life and meet another guy who will be more honest with his feelings
2006-07-10 07:41:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him, You have to tell him on how you feel. Most likely he feels the same way about you too. You are thirty five years old, you don't want to spend your whole life alone. If you don't ask him soon then you may never get a second chance.
2006-07-10 07:38:08 · answer #5 · answered by Dragonpack 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seriously, i thought this was a teenagers question.
either way, this EXACT question is asked about 40 times every day, you can search it and get awesome answers.
the best and simplest advice is, be honest. if you like him TELL HIM. and leave it at that. you're not asking him to marry you or date you, just clearing the air. no harm done.
2006-07-10 07:37:57 · answer #6 · answered by amosunknown 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're 35 but sound like an 18 year old. You have issues.
Tell him how you feel and be ready for rejection.
2006-07-10 07:35:17 · answer #7 · answered by Private Account 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I answered a similar question from a guy earlier, if its the same guy, he fancies you too. Don't be scared to be open and honest, hes your friend. Nothing will harm true friendship.
2006-07-10 07:38:46 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him before somebody else gets there before you. you think you are in a upseting position now but if you dont speak up then you will be even more upset because you will be watching the person you love, love somebody else. and that is one of the hardest things to do in life!!
2006-07-10 07:46:24 · answer #9 · answered by Jag 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to tell him what you feel. If he doesn't feel the same way then at least you know although it will hurt. Otherwise, just live and dream. That will hurt too. So what do you have to lose? Tell him, tell him, tell him that you really love him!
2006-07-10 07:36:27 · answer #10 · answered by Saudi Geoff 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
never ask a guy out , if he likes u he asks u out if he doesn't he won't and at this point if u tell him u'r in love with him let's suppose he says no ? its a big let down , or if he sayz yes it is jut becoz ov sleepin stuff so on that basis let him ask u out
2006-07-10 07:36:57 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋