What are some dirty jokes that i could tell my boyfriend?

Answer 1

In the middle of spring, glorious spring, there were three boys late to school. One boy came in five minutes after the bell rang, and the teacher gave him a stern look. "Where have you been? You're five minutes late."

"Sorry, teach... I was on top of Cherry Hill." He shrugs and takes a seat.

Five minutes after the first boy comes in, ten minutes after the bell, another boy comes in. The teacher sighed and asked, "Where have you been? You're ten minutes late for class."

"Sorry, I was on top of Cherry Hill." He slumps over but as he walks by the first boy, they give each other a high-five, and the second boy sits down behind the first.

Five minutes after that, fifteen minutes after the bell, aNOTHER boy comes in late. The teacher is getting really impatient by now. "Where have you BEEN?!"

The third boy shrinks back and looks at the other two boys, he gives them a nod and says, "Where they were." And the three boys laugh. He walks past the first two boys and gives each of them a high-five, and they all laugh.

Finally a girl comes in, five minutes after that, shaking a leaf out of her hair. Before she could say anything the teacher says, "Let me, guess, you were on top of Cherry Hill, too?"

"No," the girl says with sass, "I AM Cherry Hill."

Answer 2

This is a popular one where I live,

Wanna hear a dirty joke?
johnny fell in mud.
Wanna hear a clean joke?
johnny took a bath with bubbles.
Wanna hear a dirty joke?
bubbles is the girl next door.

Answer 3

check this out:

Two drunks were trying to figure out how to get some alcohol for free. They only had a dollar in change between them. "I've got it, follow me." said the first man.
They went to a hot dog stand and bought a dog and threw away the bun. "We'll go into a bar and order drinks, and when the bartender asks for money, I'll unzip my fly and pull out the hot dog. You drop to your knees and pretend to suck me off."
The second man agrees to this and they start their rounds.
When they get to the bar, they sit down and have a beer. The bartender tells them, "That will be three dollars."
The first man stands up and upzips his fly. The second man drops to his knees and starts sucking on the hot-dog.
"You *******!" screams the bartender. "Get the hell out of here!"
They run out and go to another bar and order drinks and when the bartender asks for money, the first man unzips his fly, and the second man drops to his knees. The bartender throws them out.
After the sixth bar the second man complains, "Man this isn't working out so well, My knees are killing me!"
"You think you've had it bad," the first man exclaims. "I lost the hotdog four bars ago!" .

Answer 4

He's at fault for disrespecting you and your wishes, but if you keep putting up with it then you are just as at fault as he is. If he doesn't stop, then it's time to move onto someone who has a mature sense of humor.

Answer 5

Q: What did the elephant say to the man?
A: That's cute, but can you breathe through it?