My 20 mo old has been biting, scratching, pinching, slapping, you name it! People have told me to do it back to him (i.e. bite him if he bites me) but I tried that and only felt like an abusive redneck! Help!!!!!!!!
2006-07-10 06:15:21 · 12 answers · asked by Vol_Fan 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
look him right in the eyes and say "No biting. Biting Hurts!"
this is a phase and he will grow out of it but you need to lay down the law as well. Biting him back won't help. You need to show him that is not how you handle anger.
I got these 2 books for my daughter:
"Teeth are not for Biting"
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1575421283/104-3428385-4699927?v=glance&n=283155
and
"No Biting"
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/044842584X/qid=1152552087/sr=1-12/ref=sr_1_12/104-3428385-4699927?v=glance&s=books
She loved these books and even wanted to take them to daycare to share.
good luck
2006-07-10 06:22:37 · answer #1 · answered by Brandie C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never take anyones advice on "biting back." It just teaches that it is okay to bite. Never use spanking, hitting as a form of discipline. These behaviors are happening because they are learned. Children have a tough time expressing frustration and will use physical ways to deal. Just redirect and distract. When he misbehaves, go down to his level and firmly say "NO biting, or no hitting etc." He is testing his world and likes reactions even negative ones. Give him no audience when he does this. Make sure you catch him behaving nicely and use praise all the time. I am studying child development and have 3 children. Check out this site below.
2006-07-10 17:09:15 · answer #2 · answered by sally 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen to your friends because they're right! When my son bit me the first time it hurt so bad that I bit him back hard enough to make him know how much it hurt, and he never bit me or anyone ever again...and I am not an abusive redneck! And the same goes for when he slaps or pinches...the key being to return the bite, slap or pinch in the same place he did it to you (or whomever).
2006-07-10 13:30:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well most infants go through this stage, and most outgrow it, whether they are bitten back, punished, or taught in gentler ways, since they all grow out of a normal phase anyways, its obvious that harsh tactics are unnecessary.
They are little scientists at this age, they try things over and over and watch reactions cause/effect over and over too, it's not intentional, but if you overreact then it gives them reasons to keep trying it, if you hurt them, it teaches them that hurting is ok, but that sometiems they'll be hurt back.
My daughter is now almost 3, and does not hit, bite, pinch,. push or kick or otherwise physicaly assualt anyone, other kids included, though she did experiment with all those things as an infant. I didn't assualt her or punish her for it, I repeatedly gently intercepted her and prevented her from making contact while in a low, serious quiet voice said "no hit" or "no bite" etc. So if she was trying to pinch, I'd gently intercept her hand before it made contact with me, in that low, serious quiet voice I'd say "no pinch" and do that repeatedly, she got no success or exciting response from this experiment and so it stopped quickly, without my having to hurt her at all. Often babies do these things while nursing, so one consequence if she kept doing it was that I'd put her down and end the nursing sesssion for a few minutes, which she definitely didn't like.
But like I said, they grow out of this anyways, so hurting them to teach them something that they can learn with gentler methods is barbaric and unnecesary.
2006-07-10 13:43:44 · answer #4 · answered by Frisbee K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him No, its bad. I think all kids go throw the biting stage. As for pinching, slapping. Maybe he is craving attention or something trying spending more time sitting on the floor and playing with him.
2006-07-10 13:19:16 · answer #5 · answered by Andrea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when my 16 month old started hitting me, I would say "No" firmly and then immediately take her hand and very gently pat or touch my face and say "love mummy, love mummy".
After few times she got the hang of it and doesn't hit me anymore.
I would say children learn by experience. If we hit them back or bite them back, we are only telling them that this behaviour is OK. They may not do it in fear of being bitten back but they don't learn that biting is wrong in itself.
When you are explaining them by saying No, the No must be kept short and quick. Children that age do not have a long memory span and do not even remember what they did few minutes ago. Hence, you can say a quick firm "no" and then immediately show them what is the expected norm of behaviour. It is ok to love someone but not ok to hit someone. Hope this helps.
2006-07-10 16:29:16 · answer #6 · answered by brc0102 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bite him back harder, I know it sounds mean but its not. It works. And no all parents do it. I did it and felt bad but sht he hasnt bite or hit or anything back to me. All it took was one time for him to do it to me and I did it 3 times as hard back and he stopped. Try it girl. It doesnt hurt to try.
2006-07-10 14:44:45 · answer #7 · answered by Kim 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know this sound silly but it works! let the little one watch a national geographic show about alligators (not too violent though). Then get a little squeaky alligator (bath toy) that they can squeak instead of bite.
2006-07-10 14:21:03 · answer #8 · answered by maeknits 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time out in a corner by themselves..Out of the room you are in
violence begats violence,and most children have to be close to you even when punished,but you cannot allow that. When you put him in a spot or take him out reinforce why you put him there
2006-07-10 13:22:50 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u really have to bite him back. it really really really works. not hard, just a lil pinch or something. u arent abusive ur a good parent!
2006-07-10 21:44:55 · answer #10 · answered by horseluvr215 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋