do you know a good limerick poem?

Question

i wanna laugh... so i would like to hear a good, creative, funny limerick from some peoplez. the person who makes the funniest limerick gets the best answer.

Answer 1

Once upon a time
the goose drank wine
the monkey chewed tobacco on the street car line
the street car broke
the monkey choked
and they all went to heaven on a billy goat!
I win!!!! yippeeeeee thank you thank you!!!

Answer 2

Limerick

There was a young lady named Kitty
Whose limerick came out so pretty
All the gents dressed in green
Were unusually keen
To admire her outstanding ditty

Limerick from Limerick

There was a young poet called Limerick
and Limerick from Limerick came
but he often got lost in the thing of it
when Limerick wrote Limericks from Limerick.

Have a laugh.

Charles M. Moore

May

There once was a poet named May
Whose meter was running all day
We rhymed up in bed
I fearfully dread
A Limerick is on its way

Rusty Daily

The Art Of Writing Limericks

A limerick can be rather funny
when the syllables are on the money.
But when none of it fits
it can give you the shits
Would you stop writing limericks, sonny?

Herbert Nehrlich


The Turtle's Girdle

There once lived a turtle
Who was the best at jumping a hurdle
But on day somethign terrible came
He fell and became lame
Even worse, to help his legs, he had to wear a girdle!


Cooling Off

The weather's cool, I can focus on school
But my heart still burns for thee, at degrees Fahrenheit,453
These nights are more comfortable, but they would be more enjoyable
Spending them next to you.

** A quick little limerick to get back into the game.

Mark Starr


Happy Birthday Mahnaz!

Well today is the day, as they say
not in March or September or May
that you party it up
at your poet fan club
I was going to write you a play.

But the gremlin that lives in my mind
who is tugging my ear from behind
he made sure I would lose
all the help from my muse
thus it follows I am in a bind.

So a limerick will have to do
it is nothing earthshaking or new
all the best to this girl
so, I'll give it a whirl
I'm sending my love to you.

************************************
Did the chicken precede the egg,
your careful attention I beg
since no hen was around
to dropp eggs on the ground..?
(and I wouldn't be pulling your leg) .

Where the egg comes from is a big riddle,
so I asked the wise man with the fiddle,
and he said that each rabbit
makes egg-laying a habit
They come out of the hole in the middle.

Now you know that those chickens don't lay.
On the farm they go search in the hay
for the eggs left by hares,
in the end though, who cares
I will have my egg poached if I may.

Answer 3

There are millions, but most of the ones I know probably shouldn't be posted on this space. Here's a clean one.

There once was a girl from Madras
Who had a magnificent ***.
It wasn't rosy and pink
As you probably think
But gray, had long ears and ate grass.

Answer 4

There was a young lady from Bude
Who went for a swim in a lake
a man in a punt
Stuck a pole up her nose
And said 'You can't swim here it's private!'

Answer 5

A hooker from Kalamazoo
Filled her vagina with glue
She said with a grin,
"If they pay to get in,
They'll pay to get out of it, too!"

A beautiful lass from St. Kitts
Had a remarkably huge pair of titts
But when she stuck my head 'tween them
hmmm hmmmmm hmm hmmmm hmm hmmm
hmmm hmmmm hm hmmmm hmmm hmmm hmmmmm hmm!

Answer 6

when the nazis landed in crete
all the whores were forced to compete
with the many storm troopers
who were using their poopers
for things other than to excrete

Answer 7

There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose d*ck was so long, he could suck it.
He said - with a grin
as he wiped off his chin,
"If my ear was a c*nt, I could f*ck it!"