Help Please, Lawyers, Judges, Anyone.....?

Question

I am married to a wonderful man and he has 2 great kids from a previous marriage, a boy and girl. His ex-wife isthe worst parent in the world. The kids are always getting "hurt" and she has a revloving door for the men that comes through her house. 3 years ago the boy got hit by a car and almost died. (I came into the picture shortly before this) The rumors are that she pushed him away from her while she was talking to a neighbor and he went into the road. The girl is SEVERELY autistic (which is what the doctors diagnoses her anyway. (when she was a baby her older sister (not my hubby's kid) would try and suffocate her and she even pulled a dresser ontop of her) Anway the autistic girls mother, keeps losing her. the girl runs out of the house and no one even realizes for like an hour, at which point they look for her. They don't even call my hubby to him him know what is going on unless they haven't found her after 2 hours of looking. The last time this happened it was 10 PM and

she was lost in the woods. They finallly called my hubby around 11:30PM and didn't find her until 12 AM she was buck *** naked (she's 8) playing in sewage. This is the 4 time this has happened in a month. We don't have the funds to go through a lawyer to seek custody and when ever we contact of children services they don't even investigate the ex because she turns on the tears and gets her way. The ex wants to put her in a ful time home but won't, because she is afraid of losing the child support money and SSI the kid gets. And they won't put her in a temp home because she is there for a week and the people send her home because she is really "not that bad" I guess I am looking for advice on what to do about this situation because it is really hurting both of us to see these kids being "cared" for by such a horrible person. Any advice?

we don't have the funds to hire and attorney and we have contacted the child protection people OVER AND OVER, but nothing ever gets done....

We currently live in PA

Answer 1

For starters, if you are calling children and youth with "we heard that..." you are going about it all wrong..... they can't base an investigation on hearsay. You need to make sure you have police reports and the such from every time the girl runs off.

Second, if all accuations of neglect and abuse are comming from the divorced parent and no one else, CPS tends to not take the charges seriously....... bitter parents try to get back at x's in this way frequently.

I reccomend you and your husband get visitation of the childrens as often as possible and try to give them a normal existance when you have them. Caring for children as a single mother is tough, and I couldn't imagine doing it with an autistic child. The mother could probably use as much help from the two of you as possible. Showing her indirectly how to parent would set a wonderful example.

Finally, If you and your husband are unable to afford an attorney or want to care for the children full time yourselves.. the LAST thing you want to do is continue calling CPS.... you run a signifigant chance of losing the children in the system.

Answer 2

there are a lot of lawyers that take probono cases. I will keep these kids in my prayers. It is a terrible thing that the mom doesn't take care of her kids. She should be grateful because some people can't even have children. If your hubby pays child support then that means in most states by law that the dad is entitled to visitation. So technically you all could rescue them that way if that is what you want to do. Also call child protective service and have them do a random check at the home or tell the hubby to talk to there doctor and request all of there health records from the various places. Good Luck!!!!

Answer 3

Sorry you both are going through this. Keep all of the proof you can. You can get court appointed attorneys if you can get charges pressed on the mother for negligence, child endangerment or both. If you can't do that in your state, then try contacting your attorney general . He/She may be able to pull some strings and get you some help. Persistence is key! The father of this child does have rights! Keep insisting with the child protection services until they help you. If you could scrounge up a little money, you could hire a private investigator to take pictures and have evidence of the abuse. I wish you both the best of luck with this. Hope I helped you out some.

Answer 4

well first of all tell the ex that she will actully more than likely get more money by putting the child in a home and she oviously has no idea about looking after a child with a interlectual disabiltly which is fine not all parents no how to do it, and second you and ur hubby should look into legal aid if you wish to speak to a lawyer you may be able to claim that, which is where you don't have to pay a cent for a lawyer the legal aid company pays. you both really need to sit down with this woman and talk to her and make her do something about it. speak to a few children group homes and get some infomation and go thro her choices.

Answer 5

If your husband wants custody, he should go see an attorney. This could be VERY VERY expensive if mom is not agreeable. If you are concerned for the childrens' welfare, in Indiana you could make a report to CPS (child protective services). It's possible that she has already been reported and is already part of the system.

Have you talked to your husband? What does he want to do? I'm not sure how old his daughter is, but surely there are day programs or live-in programs that could be helpful for her. Perhaps her mother recieves SSI benefits and hasn't pursued these avenues.

As for his children, since you suspect they are being abused, it is your moral responsibility to act. In Indiana, you would be legally required to act.

But your husband has rights too, so I believe your first step should be to contact an attorney.

My heart goes out to you. You seem very concerend for children who aren't even your own. Can you image the lifetime of hope and peace you would provide to them if you are able to get them some help? They are lucky you care and that's pretty neat.

Answer 6

well the idiot her is your husband. With all this documentation of neglect why hasn't he hired an attorney and gone back into court to sue for full custody? If the mother is not taking care of the kids and he can prove it, then no court will hesitate to give custody to the kids.

but instead of going to an attorney, you decided the best route is to go to Yahoo Answers. Maybe these kids should go into foster care because not sure if common sense is in play with either side.

Answer 7

He needs to get proof of all this, find a lawyer and take custody of his kids. I know a man who had three children with a woman. He had gotten a divorce from her and she got the kids. She was an OK mother, but a bad judge of character. Her boyfriend beat her two year old to death and dad still to this day blames himself. Mom had called him and said she needed him to come for the kids because she was fighting with her boyfriend. He basically told her to deal with it, because she was always fighting with her boyfriend. The mom left the house with her kids staying behind with the boyfriend. The 2 y/o started crying and the boyfriend beat him to death.

Tell him to take his kids!

Answer 8

Hi.
It sounds to me that this woman has a big problem
being a mother.
Take a good look at the
whole picture before you judge her.
A lot of her troubles
happen because there is no responsible spouse in the house.
That's where you come in.
Ever stop to think that maybe if "your" man wasn't so into you, he would dedicate that time to his troubled children?

Answer 9

You need to keep calling the child protection services on her. If they see they are being mistreated and such, they will have no problem with giving them to the father. And it is a good thing to use in the court room.

Answer 10

I believe that you on your own cannot do anything legally. However, in light of the events you mentioned, if you can prove them, your HUSBAND might be able to sue for custody.

I'm no lawyer, though I work in a law office. Good luck...save these poor kids from what sounds like a malicious mother.