My 5yr old son was caught behind playground equipment with a girl and they both were exploring their private parts , i'm not ready for this yet he is to young.The teacher called me to let me know that the girls mom is mad at my son, but aren't they both at fault ?
2006-07-10 02:01:13 · 22 answers · asked by sherri c 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
they're children . they probably just realized that they are different as in boys have a penis and girls have a vagina . they must have been shocked themselves at their new discovery . but that's it .
i don't think you need to panic. you just need to make him understand that girls are unlike boys , but they are also humans who have feelings just like he does.
2006-07-10 02:05:44 · answer #1 · answered by dxb 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a mother of a 5 year old son, I do sympathize with you. This was not your child's fault or the other child's fault. Many children at this age begin exploring the differences in other children. My niece was caught with a little boy doing the same thing and my sister sat her down and talked about the different parts of the body. She also spoke with her about how no one is suppose to touch her "private parts" and let her know that if she had any questions or if anyone touched her she could speak with her about it. The key is to stay calm. This is natural!
2006-07-10 04:18:19 · answer #2 · answered by KITTY 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes,they are both at fault.I've got a 5yr old boy too.And a 13yr old,11yr old,and a 4yr old.3boys and a girl.
It's not as hard as you think.Did you ask your son what they were doing?Maybe he'll help you out some.Explain to him that god made boys and girls differently.Use whatever terminology you wish.I used we-wes for boys and poo-poos for girls.Tell him thats why a boy is a boy and girls are girls.But don't freak out and make a big deal of it.That just leads to more questions.It sounds like the little girls mom did just that.
Maybe you should also tell him those are private parts and it's okay to be curious,but not to go around showing anybody else:-)
2006-07-10 02:19:22 · answer #3 · answered by Fluttery 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Little kids naturally will explore their bodies and they were both probably wondering why they had different body parts. I would explain to them the difference, but never would I be mad...... it is a totally natural thing and to be angry would send them the message they were doing something wrong. Just explain that he is a boy and he has what he has, and she a girl, and so on. Simple as that. this is the age when they are realizing the difference. Were they exploring each others parts? Now that's a different story, lol.
2006-07-10 02:10:35 · answer #4 · answered by romanov1918 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why the teacher would call you that is beyond me, it was his/her responsibility to look after your child. As for what to say about it, it kind of depends on your child but at 5 it was very likely there was no sexual reason for them to show body parts just curiosity. I am a father of two boys and a girl and the have ran into this same issue with one of my boys. I just sat him down and told him that nobody should be looking at anybody elses private parts and looking at anything that normally would have clothes covering it should not be shown. This is not a question of fault I don't think either child was at fault its a normal thing.
2006-07-10 04:43:06 · answer #5 · answered by Buddy E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This was an instance of the inquisitiveness and discovery of little kids. I really really doubt that anything of a sexual nature was said, done, or even thought.
If they'd been 10 or 12, I'd be pretty concerned.
A good talk about modesty might be in order, though.
Discourage him from doing it anymore, but don't treat it like the end of the world, or you'll be paying for therapy sessions down the road.
BTW, girl's mom should lighten up.
2006-07-10 02:11:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes of course they are both at fault, just goes to show you how much bias there is when it comes to sex, and it doesn't just happen with adults! I had a similar situation with my own son, and basically told him its very natural to be curious about things that are different, including girls, but that it is inappropriate to ask to see or touch someones privates, show someone else your privates or ask them to touch yours. My attitude was that this behavior is never acceptable (we will obviously revisit this when he gets much older), and also that it is part of the foundation for stranger safety. If he thinks its OK to show a peer his privates, of course its OK to show an adult whom you should listen to and respect, right? Frankly I am more concerned about the latter, and therefore decided to put it all in the same category in his mind. I have not had a problem since. Good luck.
2006-07-10 02:12:35 · answer #7 · answered by m r 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes they are both at fault, and no I don't think you need to scare him with going to jail. I have 4 boys and I think it is a matter of enforcing that your privates are your privates and noone needs to see or touch them, as well as you (child) need to remember that you never touch another persons privates. Explain why and that you can get in trouble and that if he has questions he can come talk to you to get the answer instead of exploring on his own
2006-07-10 02:43:21 · answer #8 · answered by - 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
5 yrs old? What are these children seeing that would make them do this? I would be curious why they were doing it.
Both children are at fault. They both should be sat down and talked to about what is right and wrong when it comes to this kind of situation.
Is there stuff that both of the children are seeing to make them think that this is right? Research it some.
Good luck!!
2006-07-10 02:06:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the consensus that there is nothing sexual in this. It is completely natural at this age to explore your body. The other mother should lighten up.
You may want to take this opportunity to explain boundries. Letting him know it's not ok to touch other's private parts and it's not ok for others to touch his.
A note to the person who suggested that he "screw" a girl. That comment is completely unacceptable and very offensive. Get off the site!
2006-07-10 02:23:21 · answer #10 · answered by littlemamajo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that he needs to respect girls' (and everyone's) personal privacy. Tell him that private parts are private and shouldn't be shared with anyone except doctors when needed. (Be sure to add the part about the doctor, because when i was a preteen, I was terrified of my first physical and thought it was wrong.) Anyway, just explain to him that he should never touch any girl and always be a gentleman. Hope that helps.
2006-07-15 22:34:59 · answer #11 · answered by Melody 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋