guys please i need your help!?

Question

I met this amazing guy on a cruise i took in april and we both hooked up with different people, the relationships didnt last (of course) and when the cruise ended he an I stayed in touch, we talk until early morning on the phone or online! we didnt keep in touch with anyone else but each other and now i consider him one of my best friends! he's an incredible guy and i think I'm starting to like him as more than a friend... he is the only person in the world who knows more about me than i do! and the only person who i can talk to on the phone for 3+ hours! i want to go out with him, but how am i supposed to tell him that!? he lives like 20 mins away and my friend has asked if he likes me and he said that we havent seen me since the cruise so he isnt surebut that he would decide next time he saw me. we're going to boomers (mini golf batting cages arcade lazer tag etc) on tuesday and how will i know if he likes me? how can i subtly tell him i like him?! PLEASE IM ME @ (continued)

PLEASE IM ME @ [e-mail]

Answer 1

from the way you are putting your qs.. you seem to be freaked out or something... take it easy...

its highly possible that you meet the right person at the mooost unexpected place and everything... talking to him on the phone and all that is great and everything but you need to know him as well in the REAL sense ... of life that is... see you knew him on criuse when everyone is chilling and being calm.... and then over the phone... three hours.. well there is definitely some chemistry...

go out on tuesday... and trust me you ll find it in his eyes whether he likes you or not.. i believe its girl instincts.... my gf told me the same thing that she got the feeling all by herself (though we are not going out anymore) and when i asked her out... she told me that she liked me before hand. the point is you ll know.

secondly... even if you find out that he likes you arent supposed to get into the relationship like the next moment... give it some time... be best friends NOT only over phone but also in person and hanging out... get the feel of it....... i have had friends with whom i usd to talk for hours over the phone but when i used to meet them in person.... suprisingly i wasnt as comfortable as i thought i would be.... so there is a difference with the person on the phone and in reality....

if your feelings keep on growing and you feel stronger about that guy... then dont say it... just treat him specially.... he ll come to you...

A guys advise.... dont rush it... if you treat him nice and make him feel special... he is going to make the move... trust me!

and please please pleaseee... dont rush it.. thats the worrrrrrst thing you can do.

good luck buddy :)

Answer 2

You didn't mention the ages involved.

Sounds to me like he's a pretty reasonable guy, since he realized he didn't know you well enough to make a decision. He understands it takes more than phone calls and messages to really know someone. As such, it is probably going to take time for him to give you an honest answer. Obviously, he "likes" you or he wouldn't communicate with you. But, it may take more than a trip to Boomers for him to know if he likes you more than just a friend.

I would suggest setting up a series of group activities with mutual friends where it would be natural for you both to be invited to go along. I would see nothing wrong with you asking if he would like to go. At some point, you should be able to expect him to initiate asking you to go somewhere simply with him, if he's really interested. If that never happens and there's nothing else preventing him from doing it, then you have your answer.

I sense this is a guy you don't want to be pushy with, so decide now whether you're willing to give it time to actually know you. Believe me, telling someone about you and sharing your life is not the same as actually being with someone. A persons true personality and character does not come out over phone calls and messages. It's too easy to say what a person thinks the other wants to hear. It's a different ball game when you look someone in the eye and have to live up to the expectations created during your conversations.

I say that from first hand knowledge of having a close bond slip away to nothing when the relatioship was brought into the real world.

Answer 3

This is always a tricky situation, and its often feared that the friendship might be ruined if the other person doesn't feel the same way. I think that if you two are 'best friends' and really close and have a healthy relationship, then if he doesn't feel the same way, maintaining the friendship should be easy.

I think you should tell him and for all you know he could be feeling the exact same way, and having the same fears! So take the risk. If you don't then you are risking a really good chance to be with someone in a relationship that you really care for.

Plan the right way to do it for you- whether that be on the phone, face to face, through a hand written letter, email or msn...whichever is best for you, the point is that you do it and get it out in the open of your relationship.

Just remember of all the great possibilities, that's why you should do it.

Answer 4

I'd dump him asap. If he likes another girl and she him, WHAT ARE YOU DOING??? Real love doesn't play games or have wandering eyes, it's committed and hard work. You MUST see this as a red flag, a deal breaker, strike three. Your young, i'm guessing, you shouldn't even be considering a SERIOUS relationship that is going to cause you insecurity. Have fun, don't become overly invested in this, WHAT? you can't flirt? Move on, the writing is on the wall and it spells trouble. Do yourself a favor and cut the guy loose, if it is destined to be, it will run it's course and he'll be back. But why you would take him back only you can answer.

Answer 5

Look for things like eye contact, offering to do little things for you, Offering to pay for the date, playing off of your inside jokes. The truth of the matter though, if he spends three plus hours talking to you on the phone, he likes you. Take it from me, he likes you.

Now for you. The universal hair flip is one way to let him know. Make eye contact when he talks to you and no matter what he says, give him your undivided attention; make it look like you’re hanging on his every word. If he says something even mildly funny; laugh and touch his arm or hand when you do it. Make it look like he just said the funniest thing you’ve ever heard. Most of all, act like you’re having the time of your life with him.

At the end of the date, tell him what a wonderful time you had and that you appreciate everything he did.

Good luck sweetie!

Answer 6

hi,

I feel that wat u r feeling for him is something like luv or may be crush u know that better but watever it is i know one thing it is a positive and beautiful feeling....and feelings are worth only when expressed!!!like anger,hunger anythingu name it so all u need to do is when u r going out with him u cud ask him things like

>>I hope i'm not crossing limits but i wish to wat feelings i have abt our realitionship

>>there is something i wanna discuss seriously,I know it's my feeling and u as my friend wud try to understand ....it is very important for me to know if u have similar feelings before things move far ahead....

>>I wanna tell u straight from my heart that over these months/yrs i've felt more than friendship in our relationship do u feel similar or not????

U know sometimes it's better if we make the move...u never know someone's is waiting for u to talk....

All the best

Answer 7

dont try to tell him you like him. Get to know him more in person, then decide. Then if you think you really like him then you should just tell him

Answer 8

Love is not a decision based your heart should understand everything and if he is in love you both love the love

Answer 9

No need to worry, these things tend to work themselves out with both of you naked. And, then you end up with her/him for the rest of your life. It happened to me...

Don't fret it.

Answer 10

Life is about taking risks. At least you'll know you tried. It would be brave of you if you tell him.