Girlfreinds first son was raped by her boyfreind at the time, last year. Month before that, his leg got broken at daycare, but no report was made by daycare. She took him to doctor, and had it fixed, but, never reported the daycare, which was her mistake. Her ex is serving 30 years. she was charged with childabuse for the leg incident, even though she told the cops that the daycare was responsible. Daycare was never investigated(daycare's director is a deputy sherriff). We got together and conceived our baby, and when she had him, DSS came in the hospital and took him from us, on grounds of neglect. In court they claimed that she failed a drug test, that I have ADHD and am not on meds, and that my mother was a morphine abuser. Neither I nor my girlfreind use drugs. I have audio proof that she has never failed a drugtest from the social worker. I'm looking for anyone that can help with our case, that knows how DSS really works. DSS is corrupt in this county and they abuse their power.
2006-07-09 19:24:54 · 13 answers · asked by Jeremy A 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I have a lawyer that seems to be a good one, but her lawyer isnt trying to do anything to help her. I am doing my own research to try and help my lawyer help me in this case. I am also doing research to help my girlfreind in her cases. she finally reported the daycare, after days of researching tryingto find the right channels to talk to. We are awaiting word of what comes of it.
2006-07-09 19:36:55 · update #1
I live in Yadkinville North Carolina. It's a small hick town where almost everyone knows everyone. I was in the daycare where the leg incident took place when i was a child and i know the director personally. I remember how she is and all the mean **** she would say to the kids including myself. There has been alot of abuse and neglect in the daycare but no one has ever reported it; except for a few cases, but nothing came of them, to my knowledge.
2006-07-09 19:40:14 · update #2
I have known my girlfreind for 17 years. THey guy she was with Raped and beat her son; that is why he is in prison. She doesnt use drugs and I have proof that she has never failed a drug test. I record every conversation that we have with DSS over the phone. I have contacted my lawyer about this and it is 100 percent legal in this state. As long as one person on the phone is aware of the recording it is legal; i.e.:me or my girlfreind. LIke i said before I was enrolled in that daycare as a child and I remember the things the director would say and i know she is coniving. She has hidden previous incidents and never reported them. SHe has illegal immigrants working for her or was at the time of the leg incident. She has denied work to many people that have applied there due to race. She would rather have mexicans working for her so she doenst have to pay them much... I am not a racist, so please dont take me for one.
I was diagnosed with ADHD in fourth grade; I am 24 now.
2006-07-09 19:56:12 · update #3
I have been off all medications for ADHD since I was 16, and I have led a pretty productive life since. I am a shift manager at a restaraunt. I needed meds in school to help me concentrate on school work. My adhd isnt as severe as most are, and never was. I was acedemicallly gifted in school and I succeeded well, until I was in High School, I was a goth during the time of the Columbine shootings, and wore a trench coat. which made the school leary of me; in which they kept a good watch on me and kicked me out for drawing pictures that were questionable in the fact that I might try to hurt others or myself. I had no intentions of the sort, so I went and took the GED test and passed without having to take any classes. I passed in the top 20 of my class; without medication.
2006-07-09 20:02:46 · update #4
when they took custody of my son, a few days later they came into my home and took pictures. I have a 2 foot Savannah monitor lizard that eats the rats that I breed. THey have their own room. And anyone that has bred or had any type of rodent as a pet knows of the smell they can produce. THey had thrown their bedding into the floor like they usually do. They took a picture of my clock that is on the wall, that depicts my religion; it has mystic symbols on it. It is a rented property and the front porch has water damage to the point that there is a few holes in it; which the landlord has told me that he will fix it but has yet to do it. They used all of this against me in the first hearing. They violated my freedoms by discriminating against my religion, and the choice of having an exotic animal. They claimed that my lizard would eventually become over 300 pounds..... and that the rats would breed disease; or that a cockroach would get a disease, and transfer it to my child.
2006-07-09 20:11:32 · update #5
I have yet to read anywhere that a domesticated rodent can cause disease. I know that sewer rats can, but my rodent freinds dont travel through sewage. They are using everything they can against me. I spoke my mind, and asked all the right questions and they want me to take anger management. I never got answers to my questions. all I got was questions, or they beat around the bush. I asked them why they lied on the stand about my girlfreind failing a drug test and they said that it would be cleared up in the next court hearing. They said that the social worker would "recant" what she said.
2006-07-09 20:16:22 · update #6
My mom isnt a drug user either. She is on pain meds due to degenerative disk disease. She doesnt take the dosage or the style of dose that DSS has claimed under oath in court. Her husband has the disease as well and also has diabetes. THey used that against them in court to persuade the judge not to allow them to take temporary custody of my child.
They family that has my child, is my girlfriends mom's adopted sister and her husband. THe woman lost custody of her child when she was young, and her husband has severe diabetis but doesnt take care of himself.
We went to visit our son, who was born a month premature, in their home and seen that the man was smoking not even 5 feet from him. They were hatching chickens in the house, (bird flu is out again); which is why i was concerned.
The next week, my girlfreind went and witnessed when she walked through the door that our son was left unattended on a changing table with a wet diaper and asleep. The man was in the kitchen.
2006-07-09 20:26:45 · update #7
He wasnt paying him any attention. When we reported this to DSS, they stripped our rights of visitations, on grounds that the family was investigated by "professionals" and were approved. WE dont know if our child is being neglected nowand will never know for a fact
....
2006-07-09 20:28:46 · update #8
We went online and checked records to see if the daycare was investigated by the police when my girlfriend first told them of it and they were not. They have since been investigated because of the report made by my girlfreind to the daycare hotline of this state.
2006-07-09 20:31:20 · update #9
And another thing, after she picked him up from daycare she went directly to her moms work, which is a mile up the road. once there she noticed his leg was hurt. From there she went directly to the ER. She didnt have time to do it between daycare and her moms work or he would have been screaming all the way there. She couldnt have done it before taking him to daycare or the workers at daycare would have noticed it and reported it; or at least thats supposed to be their job and it would have covered their asses. The daycare is notorious for covering up ****. I know because I was in there when I was a child. I never said anything because I was young and didnt know any better. The day that his leg was broken a mexican lady that spoke no english carried him out to my girlfreind, didnt walk him out there, but, carried. The person that was usually watching him there was out "sick" that day. When that person was asked about her not being there, she lied and said that she was there.
2006-07-09 21:02:40 · update #10
And said that he was fine when he left. She was asked to resign shortly thereafter for the sake of publicity( media coverage) by the director. Her sister and my sister are close friends.
2006-07-09 21:06:29 · update #11
Thank god my family have freinds in the government of NC. They have gotten in touch with the Main office of DSS in the state capitol, and they are pissed. There is an investigation going on and the DSS of this county may end up with a few less employees.
They have also got a freind that was once employed by this county's DSS but has retired, and is giving my family all kinds of good information on how to beat them.
The only problem is the legal representation of my girlfreind. He doesnt have a very good win record. We are hoping when we can get the local news channel to investigate and some law firm be willing to either take payments or take the case pro bono. Either way, we are in an up hill battle until we can get the representation she needs. A court appointed lawyer can only do so much, and the one she has isnt willing to do anything at all for her. He recomended her to plead "NO CONTEST". But she is inocent and she would be stupid not to fight.
2006-07-09 21:15:24 · update #12
Well, on Wednesday I had to take a paternity test for DSS; even though my name is on the birth certificate and i dont contest that he is my son. I even had to take a drug test, which I know I have passed. Mom's house was finally inspected, and they passed, now we are awaiting the national background check. And since neither her nor my step father has ever been convicted of anything; we get to see how long DSS will try to drag it out. Tomorrow I get to go take that nice Psychological evaluation; so I get to prove that I am fine without medication and to show that I dont need therapy. I have been through these evaluations before; I know what to expect. In fact I think i may have seen the same doctor when I was younger. Anyways, I am about to finish my training at work, so here in a few more weeks I will officially be a shift manager and this fall I will be moving to another store. With that said, I will be getting off of here.
2006-07-23 17:14:59 · update #13
Let me give you a little review, I previously years ago had DSS (DHS in my state) "problems" and my four children where in jepordy of being removed from my home. I went from that situation to working for DHS and I now am a Foster Parent Partner (we take in foster kids). You want to know how to get your son back....PLAY THEIR GAME, STOP fighting them. You'll never win. You will only suceed in making them mad and they hold the ball in this game. Never forget that. Don't let it be about the principle of things let it be about your boy.
1st Get rid of the mointor, I agree that Sav. mointor is not as bad a Nile or anything but all have the same reputation. Judges are not employees at the local repti. store. Don't know anything about them except what the case worker says. More than not doesn't care about anything except for case worker says. When you defend your Sav. Mon. the ONLY THING he sees is you care more about the pet than the child.
2nd Rats gotta go. To the courts a rat is a rat is a rat. They see in their minds nasty sewer rats only. You WILL NOT be able to convince ANY judge that it is domesticated once again it will apear to the judge that the animals prevail over your own child.
3rd Rent an apartment. They have no maintance and are centaly heated with airconditioning.
4th Go get your own folic drug test (hair) it can test back for months. Your hair growns in spurts so every cm, or so represents a period of time (few weeks). They segment it out and can tell when what drugs were used. If you were hospitalized or have a perscription your good to go.( If you did dope skip the folic test.)
5th Take all the parenting classes avalible in your area. Here through the women center, health dept all those goverment funded agency have free parenting classes. Take them, take as many as you can repeat some if they will let you. Looks good the the judge. Besides you will be required to take classes before he is returned to you.
6th Change that aditude! No longer is it about what they are doing to your life.....put that aside. Harder to say than do I know, but trust me I've been in your shoes and I beat this game.
Everything is yes mam no mam. You want me to jump how high? Kiss you know what. Say to them "I'll do what ever you want to get my son back" "What can we do to improve our situation" "How can we help ourselves to get him back...what do we need to do to become better parents?"
2006-07-15 18:12:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
OMG!! My husband and I went through this. Last september, a social worker and ac op showed up at my house and told me that they had gottena call about possible abuse going on with my 3 year old daughter. The social worker said very little. The crooked cop did all the talking and cussing in my face. They didn't want me to call my husband. My children had their own rooms and their owns beds whjile my husband and I slept on a mattress onthe floor in the living room. Anyway. We are ina small town in Kentucky and its is the same here as it is where you are. If people here don't know the whole story, they will make up what they want. it went so far as we were both arrested for endangerment of trhe welfare of a minor and I also got assult in the 4th. Social services rushed it to court in a different county in order to get a particular judge that just believed everything they said and nothing that we said. We had no choice but to take a public deffender and were totally screwed. My husband's employer hired a lawyer for him. He was for the criminal charges but ended up helping out in family court too. I ended up having to plead guilt for the charges in order to keep it from going to trial. To make a long story short, social services will do and say what ever they feel they need to in order to not looki like they made a mistake. And they will never admit to it either.
Talk to your lawyer about representing the both of you. She needs a different lawyer. Make social services come up with the evidence against her and never give up. Our case has now been closed and so far they are levaing us alone but I am sure that something will happen again. Just keep your head up and keep doing your research. It will pay off.
2006-07-10 13:12:59 · answer #2 · answered by heather_ac_2000 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dss it getting really more into their job especially now all these case...about child abuse...i believe what you say they abuse their power. Big they would ask why was the baby not reported in the first place....that was the 1st error...this society believe in paper and black ink....meaning have every detail like who, when, where,at what time the baby ..was hurt...how long it took to take to the hospital...I'm just letting you know that if you don't a paper stating your child was hurt in school...they are going to give case to dss...right everything....any falls ...any thing that has to do into the baby not getting hurt and always report it...ask the daycare if they made a report usually they do..but remember always look and write anything truthful that chose he is not being abuse ...you don't have to worry....just keep everything in written and whom you spoke to this you have your back cover....good luck..
2006-07-10 02:42:27 · answer #3 · answered by gengen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a corrupt system if this ever happens again you need to leave the county that you have an open case in. You should seperate yourself from your girl and get your own crib and transpo.......... then apply for customdy of your child. Lastly get a lawyer. Do not attempt to get involved with the DSS not at all they are a racket and will do and say whatever they have to in order to get and keep children.
2006-07-21 10:55:05 · answer #4 · answered by Michael H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My girlfriend and I have both been through this same system, there is not much you as an Individual can do,
but there is much that we all can do as a collective.
we need to all get together right here and now as I speak
on Yahoo answers And start Planning, we cannot count on the Gvnt, because they are in on it.do you want to beat them? We must hit them ware it hurts ( in the pockit book) Together we can force them into bankruptsy and eventualy into nonexistance, we need all the families that this has ever been done to uniting with us( remember united we stand) And By the way they are using our Tax Dollars To fund there wicked scheme. I would like to talk with any one who wants to join in the fight. My girlfriend's son was beaten in the foster home these people placed him in. my feeling is not only should the fosterparent go to jail, but the social worker should be tried, convicted, sent to prison, and have a permanent criminal record, which would disqualifi themfrom working for the gvnt permanently, we need to turn them into the criminals that they are. i just want to reiterate that,We can't do it as individuals, but we can as a collective.click on my profile and contact me if you are interested(lets all do it together)
2006-07-23 01:42:18 · answer #5 · answered by cafe_blue_note 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, my family has had to put up with those people for a good long while. One, take your meds. They won't kill you. In fact, there are alot of people in college trying to get their hands on that stuff, just so they can focus even more. Two, get a lawyer, and sue the department for the expense later. If they really have no grounds, then you will win the fight. But act fast, babies get adopted quick.
2006-07-10 02:41:11 · answer #6 · answered by kerbourchardalan 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry for saying this. But your gf or wife whoever she is should have filled papers with the childcare. Filling out an accident report. Sure the county can go back to the day care but there is no proof it happened there. I know a day care in town beats the kids and does not feed them, but when the social worker shows up everything is fine. The social workers believe the child care providors. Call legal services and get a free attorney. Or file a complaint against the coutny Take the day care provider to court she is sworn under oath to tell the truth.Maybe she used drugs behind your back and having an ex who is in jail for 30 years is not going to give her a big record. They have to do what is best for the child. Dont argue with them. Agree to parenting classes and weekly drug tests. Hell go to AA meeting even if your not a drug user, it will look good on your record and help you get your child back. You may have to put a restraining order on your mother if she is a drug user. In all honesty I do not think they had a right to take your child. Call legal services. Maybe your gf did fail a drug test that she was not honest with you about. You seem to be a strong man who has your head on straight. I am sorry but I think your gf is lieing to you. Maybe she was the one who abused the child and broke the childs leg. In all honesty any child care provider would right away report to her county worker for childcare that this child broke its leg in her care and a worker would come out and invesitgate. I am sorry but I think your gf is lieing and is responsible for the broken leg. If her ex is in jail for 30 years then he must have done something really bad, so she was in a bad relationship. Maybe your gf was frustrated and did not mean to break the childs leg. As much as I hate to say this, I do not want to hurt you. I think your gf is lieing to you and keeping something from you. They just do not remove a child from a home without good reason or come to the hospital and take a child without talking to you first. It think your gf has a secret past she is hiding from you. Your best bet is to leave her. Take parenting classes agree to drug testing and AA classes even if you dont have a problem. File for custady of the child. You gf already has a bad record with the child of a broken leg. And no social worker would risk loosing her liscense and not report an injury to her county childcare worker. You have to decide do you want to stay with this women who has lied and deceived you and be without your child. Or do you want to leave this women, take parenting classes and file for custady. If your gf mom is using drugs what is to say her daughter is not. please do not be angry with me. But I have worked with the system before. Any mother is going to lie to save her own *** and it always easier to blame it on someone else then take responsibility. I can gurantee the child care provider was investigated fully. Wake your gf is decieving you. FIght for your child and end the relationship with your gf before your child is put up for adoption.
2006-07-10 02:45:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where do you live? There are higher authorities than your local/county officials. Try to contact your state services if possible. You definitely need a good lawyer. I don't know what they would gain by making up complete lies. Maybe there is more to the previous story than your girlfriend told you.
2006-07-10 02:33:43 · answer #8 · answered by Miss D 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Really sad and i'm sorry.
Bro what i recon is that you approach nearest FBI office and Put a special request and explain all this to the FBI Officer.
I'm Dam sure they gona help you out.
(2) If you are not satisfied or confident enough on this you can contact CARE ( its an organization which helps the people which no money and power )
All da best
2006-07-10 02:35:03 · answer #9 · answered by Fishi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The worse thing you can do is not get an attorney. This is your son, it does not matter how much it costs, if you want him, you will do what it takes. Let your son know that you want to be there for him...through your actions.
2006-07-10 02:31:55 · answer #10 · answered by Kari F 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋