Do you think the cry it out method is a good way to get your child to go to sleep?

Question

My son is 2 and i am looking for methods to help him to go to sleep on his own what is everyones opinin on the let them cry them selves to sleep method im not sure about this meathod and not really sure if its the best route to go

Answer 1

~~let him cry it out. (it won't kill him to cry it out) the only way he will get used to going to bed on his own is if he is forced into learning that behavior. he didn't learn to stay up and be sat with every night in an over night process, so it will take time for him to learn that he's the child and you are the mommy.... right now he thinks he is in charge, and he's right, he is in charge as long as you allow him to be in charge he will remain in charge. consistancy in the bedtime routine is also important~~Bj

Answer 2

I refuse to do the cry it out method. I will not subject my son to that.

The following method was very successful for us.

For three or four nights, I stayed with him comforting him with my touch and voice. I didn't pick him up unless he really started crying. (I would let him fuss some, but not cry)

Then for another three or four nights, I soothed him with just my voice from the door (If you have a big room, you might do half way to the door) - again, not picking him up or touching him unless he was really crying - not just fussing.

After that, I stood on the other side of the closed door and soothed him from there.

After just three nights of that, I could complete our bedtime routine, sing him two songs and tell him "Go to sleep. Mommy will be back to check on you in a few minutes." No crying, fussing or anything.

There are better ways than letting your sweet little boy cry and freak out until he falls into an exhausted sleep.

Answer 3

Unfortunately for you....you have waiting until he is two. I have three kids and my first two I was not so good at the bed time routine so with the third----I let him cry it out when he was 7 months old and it was THE best thing I ever did. He goes down without ANY problems now that he is 20 months and has slept through the night since then too.

So, that is not much help to you now......
I would begin by establishing a night time routine. I would begin it about an hour before bed time! This means things like: Bath, watch 1/2 hour of TV, read a few stories, prayers, brush teeth etc. Whatever YOU want the routine to be---but it should be consistant EVERY night. Kids like routine.

BIG SUGGESTION: You might want to start this **LATE** the first night----and move it back by 15 minutes every night until he is in bed at a reasonable time.

When you finally have him tucked in bed. Explain to him that it is now time to go to sleep. Is he still in a crib? That actually helps! Hugs and Kisses and goodnight. We have a fan running in the room for white noise......Then lights out and leave.

I see no problem with letting him cry for five minutes. Go back in, no picking him up......love, kisses, time for bed....lay him back down.....leave-----this time I would extend it by a few minutes. When he gets the hint that this is not going to get him what he wants, he will go to sleep. It is hard and it is TOUGH to do. I will promise you that it will ONLY be for a few nights and then your routine will be in place and life will be MUCH more peaceful.

Answer 4

As long as he's not crying because he's hungry and it's just a temper tantrum, I don't see anything wrong with this. Some parents tend to spoil their children by running to their crib to hold them and try to rock them to sleep. The problem with this is the child becomes dependent on you and will then keep crying until you run to the rescue once again. Also, you lose a lot of sleep and become stressed and that's never a good thing. You have to teach your child that they don't need you there to go to sleep. Eventually, they'll learn and go to sleep on their own.

Answer 5

I too had a hard time with my child at bedtime. I rocked her every night almost until she was 2. Now when it's bedtime, I tell her to kiss her Daddy night-night and she goes upstairs and she lays in her bed and watches a movie(she's asleep within 10 minutes.) She's not screaming, I no longer have to rock and rock until she's asleep and the TV shuts itself off or I go in there to turn the movie off long before it's half through. I also play soothing music in the background. This method isn't for everybody, and I'm sure I've got lots of people frowning right now, I don't care. You have to do what works best for you. Try also, putting him in the bed and you sitting next to it for a couple of nights, and when he's starting to drift off, leave the room. Just try not to pick him up when he starts to cry. I am a firm believer to never let your child cry till he/she falls asleep. DO what your Motherly instinct tells you to. Too soon, he'll be older and no longer wanting Mommy to cuddle and kiss him. Embrace this, it shall pass.

Answer 6

you should try to tell him a story or sing-put him at ease and try and make it a pleasant experience. Let him know you will see him at "wake up time" or when "the sun wakes up". Talk to him in terms he will understand. The crying is more for attention and to get you to do what he wants. But you need to show him that you are the boss. If after five minutes he's still crying, go in calm him down and tell him he has to go to sleep. Be firm in this. It takes approx. 2 weeks for a child to change their behavior, so don't despair if it doesn't work right away

Answer 7

If the baby's crying it doesnt always mean somethings wrong. Sometimes they are so tired but fighting the sleep. Yes I let mine cry themselves to sleep all the time. I also didnt rush for bottles at the first cry either.I allowed them to cry a few minutes. It may sound like abuse but its advised by experts and Pediatricians. By doing that my kids are all happy go lucky and secure. I had a much easier time returning to work as well because I didnt overwhelm them with affection and give into every whimper.

Answer 8

No. Please don't do that. A baby who falls asleep having exhausted himself with all the crying will never get a good night's sleep and will wake up cranky too. He will then want to cling to you all of the next day. Just like we adults cannot get a good night's rest if we have something on our mind the child too will subconsciously be thinking"why is momma doing this to me" .

What I do with my son (16 mths) is I give him a good snack at 4 pm we go down to play, return at 7.00pm have a bath and a small supper. We take him to his room, dim the lights and put on some soft music(nursery rhymes) and let him fiddle around with his toys for a while and then we read him a book while we cuddle him. He falls asleep with a smile and woke refreshed in the morning "Ready for action"

Our routine may not be best for you but please, please do not let the baby cry himself to sleep.

Answer 9

Well, my mom didn't do that even though some of her friends did it and when I have a child I will not do it either. If you're not comfortable with doing that then don't. There are other methods, try some out until you find something that brings both you and your baby joy.

I think one way is to make a routine bedtime thing. It will take awhile before your baby realizes its a routine thing so you'll need some patience. But have fun with it, he/she 'll only be a baby once :)

Answer 10

You're going to have to be really strong for this. In fact, I recommend having the child's father or a really good friend there when you attempt this. Put the child down and let him cry for 5 minutes. If he's still crying, go into his room and talk to him. DO NOT PICK HIM UP!!! Just sooth him verbally, tell him everything is OK and that you love him and he needs to go to sleep. Then leave the room. This time let him cry for 10 minutes. Repeat the above. Next time let him cry for 15 minutes. NEVER LET HIM CRY FOR MORE THAN 15 MINUTES!! Keep telling yourself he's safe, he's not in pain, he just is in a learning stage. It will be OK, I promise. You won't have to do this more than a few times, I promise. Be tuff, Mom! This is as much for him as for you! Good luck, sweetheart, and hang in there!!!!

Answer 11

we let our daughter cry it out when she was about a year old at 2 1/2 she has been a great sleeper for a long time now and we all including her are much happier for it

as long as he is fed and dry and not scared and you arent horrified by the thought then it is a very workable method but like everything else dont do it unless you are comfortable with it if you arent there are many other methods out there but i found this one to be the quickest and most effective one and it is far from child abuse