Im getting married at the end of 2007 and I have my 3 best girlfriends as my bridesmaids. I want to ask one of my male friends to be my bridesmate. He's been one of my best friends for ages and is a very gay young man, since I'll not be having a church oriented wedding anyway I have no worry of the church approving or not, What Im afraid of though is that he may be offended at the prospect of being put in a women's place or am I being overconcientous? Some people have told me just to have him stand in as one of my fiance's groomsmen but they've not met yet and I want him on my side. I've gotten mixed answers from our mutual friends as to what his reaction may be, can I get some opinions?
*note* I am aware that a huge number of people will have an issue at the prospect of a gay man in my wedding, please don't drop your opinion in if it is simply to condem my friend and I to hell. This is not meant to offend anybody, please offer the same respect to me.
2006-07-09 14:56:15 · 5 answers · asked by the blue olive 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I would definately have him as a brides-mate. I think he'd love that! Technically groomsmen are the grooms friends, and wouldn't it mean more to you and him if he was standing up there on your side? I think he'd love it. Don't worry about what other people think about having a guy standing up there with the girls. He's your friend, and if its important that he's a part of the good day, then go for it!
Congratulations on getting married!
2006-07-09 15:33:19 · answer #1 · answered by The Girl Next Door 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I think that your friend will take it as a compliment that you care about him enough to ask him! I would say that as long as you specify in your wedding program or whatever, that he is the bridesmate or the bridesman and don't refer to him as a bridesmaid that is fine.
If he's not your fiance's friend, it doesn't make sense to ask him to be a groomsman. I think that where he should be is over by you. I'm sure he won't get mad and that he'll understand you're coming from a place of wanting him to be there with you on your special day.
2006-07-10 12:55:31 · answer #2 · answered by ykokorocks 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's actually more common than you think, for a woman to choose a man to be at her side during her wedding.
Only way to find out his reaction, is to ask him. Maybe see how he feels on the concept of a bride having a male on her side, and if he's fine with it, tell him why you asked. He'll probably agree to do it.
2006-07-09 22:01:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my best friend married her (now ex-) husband, I was asked by each of them, seperately of course, to be their person-of-honor since I was the one to introduce them. It was an honor, but I chose to be hers since her grandmother was helping to pay for the wedding and would most likely frown upon a female "bestman".
As long as your fiancee is okay with a man being one of your attendants, then I don't see where the problem would be.
Good luck!
2006-07-09 22:09:38 · answer #4 · answered by Angie P. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think its sweet to have him as a Brides-mate. I don't think he ill be offended in the least. Talk to him see if he wants to be a brides-mate. I don' think it will be a problem for your friend or the church.
2006-07-09 22:20:38 · answer #5 · answered by bluechick 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋