i have a babie on the way that i know is mine with my current girlfriend but my ex is 8 monthes pregnant?

Question

my ex cheated on me after 3 years and thats when she got pregnant i am not sure if it is mine and neither is she should i be there for the baby to be born or wait for a dna test to go see the baby if it is my kid i would like to see him right when he is born bot my current girlfriend says she will leav me if i go to see him in the hospita what should i do what would be concedered right
?

Answer 1

If the baby with the ex is yours, you will have to be responsible to financially support that child and you will have a moral responsibility to be part of that child's life. You current girlfriend must understand this. You will also be there for her child. Do not be there for the child's birth, that would be a bit much, but do go see the baby in the hospital and arrange for an immediate DNA test so you will know what your obligation is. Explain to your girlfriend this is not about you and your ex, only about you and a baby that is potentially yours. Help her to see that the fact that you want to take responsibility for this baby, if it is yours, is actually a good thing for her and her baby, because it shows that you are a responsible person. Be reassuring, but do what you know is right.

Answer 2

The right thing to do would be to support the ex from a distance. There is after all a 50/50 chance the child is yours. Yes you should see the child in the hospital. It will be a struggle but no one has ever been berated for acting too much like an adult.
I see youve picked a couple of real winners here, one cheats and one is so insecure she wont let you see what may very well be your child. I'm suggesting you chose your women more carefully in the future and you take control of birth control by using condoms.

Answer 3

Wow! First of all consider the fact that your ex cheated on you and this may not be your baby.On the other hand it appears you are in a good relationship with your present g/f.Why take a chance on messing that up? And if you want to see the new born.Take your present g/f with you.Excluding her will only bring on more problems and ruin your relationship! If the baby your ex is carrying is your baby.Under no circumstance should you let your ex start controlling your life. If you love your present g/f and want a lasting relationship with her,include her on everything concerning the other child.Including any phone calls,if she isn't present,tell her about the call.Then she won't be jealous or left wondering if you're going to leave her and return to the ex!

Answer 4

Hard question. Your current girlfriend says she will leave you? Thats not a good sign. If a DNA test confirms the baby IS yours then what will she say next, tell you never to see your own offspring? On the other hand if its NOT your child do you realy want to see someone elses child being born out of your ex and carry the memory of that forever? phew...hard question.

Answer 5

I would request a DNA test for sure, but you won't know if he's yours for some time after the test is done, so I'd go to the hospital regardless if you'll regret not going if you find out the baby is yours. Your girlfriend needs to realize that you don't have any feelings for your ex (hopefully you don't anyway) and going to the hospital doesn't mean anything other than you're going to see the baby. You need to discuss with her why she doesn't want you going to the hospital and you need to reassure her that it doesn't mean anything. Maybe ask her if it'd help reassure her if she went with you (assuming that'd be okay with you)?

Answer 6

i'm sure you love your gf. but heres the deal you are a father first. If she can't except that tell her too bad b/c if she really loved you she wouldn't make you choose between her and your baby. Your children always come first. Looks like she needs to grow up and you should be there when the child is born but demand a dna test as soon as possible. i had the same problem with my exs gf. she was young and insecure and wasn't mature enough to deal with the fact that he had a child with another women, so be careful.

Answer 7

I don't think you want to know 'what would be considered right' because it's too late to undo what is already done.

However, you should certainly wait for the DNA test and then deal with the problem from there. It may be best for everyone, in the end, to 'write off' your biological fatherhood of your ex's child (if it turns out that you are the father) and to concentrate on getting things right for you and your current girlfriend and your child.

Answer 8

Your first obligation is to the child. How would you feel if it was yours and you missed out on those first few minutes of life. They are the most precious. It will hurt you later find out it is not yours, but a little hurt is better then regret that you was not there for your child.

As for the girlfriend if she is not supporting your decision to see the baby now how is she gonna feel if the baby is yours. I say leave her now they are plenty of good women that will not make you choose between your kids and them, that is selfish on her part.

Answer 9

your girlfriend is nasty for not wanting you to see your own child. You should do it behind her back. You should definately get the DNA results, and most likely, it is probably going to be yours anyway. You want to see a kid that is probably yours birth, don't you? Your girlfriend will NOT leave you if she is pregnant, you should call her bluff. If she does, she has got some major issues and needs to grow the fk up.

Answer 10

Do what you feel is right. You have a right to go to the hospital and see the child. If it is your baby this is time you can't get back.