Is this a correct saying and good advice, "In Rome do as the Romans do"?

Question

Should you try to fit into the customs of another place, another family, or another country if you are staying there for a while? Or should you try to impose your own cultural ways on your hosts?

Answer 1

You should try and fit in whereever you go. Imposing your own cultural values on other people is rude. Just because you've now arrived on the scene doesn't mean people have to change for YOU. THEY were there FIRST. THEY did not ask YOU to come there. If you are talking about visiting a FAMILY, then you are a GUEST in their home..either invited or uninvited and it is presumptuous of you to decide they have to re-arrange their environment for YOU. They should try and accommodate you if there is something special you need, but if they cannot do so, you have no right to demand anything and you should leave. It's the same thing when you walk into a party and decide everyone should acknowledge YOU first. That's not the way it works. When you walk into a room it is up to YOU to acknowledge the ROOM. The ROOM does NOT acknowledge YOU.

Answer 2

You should respect the culture and customs of the place you're in, YOU'RE visiting them, not the other way around. It should be a wonderful learning experience about another culture.

This does not mean participating in their religions necessarily, as this may go against some of their, or your, beliefs.

By being curious, open, loving and kind, you will find that they will express more curiousity regarding your culture and customs. This creates open doors, whereas imposing beliefs on people without respecting them closes them firmly shut.

Plus, in some places they can kill you for imposing cultural beliefs on people, so caution is always best.

Answer 3

You should try to fit in to an extent that is sensible. For example - You are a vegetarian, they are not. Do you start eating meat? Of course you wouldn't, like wise you wouldn't take over their kitchen and throw out the turkey twizzlers would you?
It's good manners, common sense and a sense of humour that are important in these situations.
Though there is a huge difference between visiting Belgium and Saudi Arabia if you are a westerner. Some places need research and planning. I think I'm getting off the point here, so I'll shut up.

Answer 4

The word "impose" is harsh and irks me completely - it reminds me of colonization which is merely arrogance in my book.

I took a class a few years ago in preparation for studying abroad. One lesson was about the topic you are asking about. The conclusion we came to in the class was this:

When in another culture, try to remove your natural tendency to judge their culture by comparing it to yours. Just accept it and embrace it.

That's too idealistic for me - so I have my own little "theory," if you will, for when I travel...enjoy the other culture and pay attention to their customs. Some customs will be different than what you are used to, i.e. the way they greet someone.

To be polite, and get the most out of your visit, a person should try and exercise these little customs - it enhances the experience by giving it all a try first-hand. If they ask about YOUR customs, answer them. But don't arrogantly "impose" your own of course!!

So yes, "when in Rome..." is a great little phrase that helps travelers to be polite and gracious when in a foreign culture, which is most important!

Answer 5

Hi -- I believe the proverb is "when in rome, do as the romans do." I think it's good advice to at least try -- pick up some phrases in a foreign language and be comfortable that you may sound rediculous. Otherwise you're making everyone else -- in the country, place, or other family work extra hard because you're not making the effort.

Answer 6

The quote is "When in Rome, do as the Romans do."

Stories behind Famous Sayings


The Saying: WHEN IN ROME, DO AS THE ROMANS DO.

Who Said It: St. Ambrose

When: 387 A.D.

The Story behind It: When St. Augustine arrived in Milan, he observed that the Church did not fast on Saturday as did the Church at Rome. He consulted St. Ambrose, bishop of Milan, who replied: "When I am at Rome, I fast on a Saturday; when I am at Milan, I do not. Follow the custom of the Church where you are." The comment was changed to "When they are at Rome, they do there as they see done" by Robert Burton in his Anatomy of Melancholy. Eventually it became "When in Rome, do as the Romans do."


As you can see, this is a church and hollywood saying.

In my opinion, one should respect the systems and beliefs of others and never impose your own on them. Although, it is best to do as you see fit as long as it hurts no one.

Answer 7

for sure they ought to. yet they gained't. and for this reason they decrease the British way of existence with their presence, primitive habit and coarser customs. In time, Britain and ecu international places with important immigrant (third international moslem Asia, Africa) inhabitants will be a lot less sophisticated places to stay. The Romans ought to serve Romans first and pay a lot less interest to political correctness. they are in fee are they not?

Answer 8

It would be best to let your hosts know what you absolutely cannot do/eat, eg: Muslims cannot eat pork. That would be the best way to avoid awkward situations.

Blindly following other cultural customs may not be all that good.

Answer 9

You should fit in. The Romans civilized the world with that saying.

Answer 10

It depends on the custom in question. You should try to adapt to customs that violate your sense of squeamishness. You have no obligation to adapt to customs that violate your ethical sensibilities.