How do we make grandma understand why her granddaughter isn't being baptized as a Christian?

Question

She asks why, and we told her that we are not Christian. She keeps asking "But aren't you going to raise your daughter as a Christian?". She doesn't seem to understand that since we are not Christian, we would prefer not to raise out daughter as one. We live in fly-over land where people are pretty much just considered Christian by default.

We are agnostic.

Answer 1

Baptism does not make you a Christian, a profession of faith does. Baptism is a testimony to others of your faith. Perhaps your daughter will become a Christian when she is older and then be baptized, and it will be her decision.

Answer 2

Gently and repeatedly remind her that you aren't christian and your preferences about raising your daughter not as a christian. (I'm wiccan and my husband is buddhist, my children have had the freedom to choose which path they would walk since they were old enough to understand.) Or, you could compromise and allow grandma join in with your daughters religious raising. Kind of giving grandma some peace because she will probably feel like she is being an active part in the little one's spiritual life, but just make sure grandma knows that your daughter will also be taught the way you want her to be also. Encourage open talks. I understand how hard it is and it is an on-going battle sometimes. But hopefully grandma will see the good in your decision and be supportive. Blessed be!

Answer 3

Her generation probably doesn't understand "agnostic", she would probably be more receptive if you were from "another religion". Now, if you love this lady and for the family peace I would let her do it, what does it hurt? Another idea is since she must be catholic and even though they have the new testament they believe in baby water baptism as the door to salvation and it's not Biblical.Maybe you want to take that route, telling her to read her Bible, giving her scriptures about salvation like Romans 10:9-10, and ones that explain what water baptism represents, and show you have to be an adult or at least old enough to make this "public statement of your faith in Christ: It represents being buried to your old ways and sin and risen up with Him to a new life where you commit yourself to obey His Word.That way you could suggest you want her to make her own desicion when she grows up. If you like this option I'll e-mail you the scriptures about water baptism that I don't have on the top of my head right now. I know you probably want to have a good relationship with her since she's family and you'll have to interact with her all her life, and this type of things can get so stupidly complicated and end up in broken fellowship with other members of the family, it's not worth having this thorn the rest of your lives.

Answer 4

There is no Biblical justification for baptizing an infant any way. It is not the business of anyone else to tell you that you must perform such a rite.... No one of the Christian Faith would do so... even those few who seem to think it is still ok to baptize infants...No Christian, if they are truly of The Faith, would "push" any rite on any one

I am sad for you all that you have been so treated by those you think , and who probaably think themselves, are christians, that you have rejected God... I am not pushing... just sad... I wish you a good and meaningful life. For both you and your husband.. and for the little one

Answer 5

Honestly, I believe baptism is symbolic and only really for the family. Rituals are of no real value.

Therefore, in your shoes, I'd probably baptize the child just to please its close relatives and avoid strife. That's really the most important thing here. . .it will be years before your child can digest spiritual matters. It makes no difference to your child at all.

Best to be vague as possible and compromise when it comes to these things, and avoid getting into debates with people who are incapable of seeing things in a way other than their own.

Arguing with some people is like trying to churn water.

Answer 6

It's just water on a kid's head, for Pete's sake! If it's gonna be an issue, just make Grandma happy and let her have her church party and bring cake.

Besides, your kid could want to become active in the church, ever thought of that? Your child should have the same religious freedom you enjoy.

There are far more disappointing things a child could grow up to be!

Have an open mind.

Answer 7

tell her that no where in the bible does it say the word Christian., it says in Christ be Christ like. Christ .means a state of being, and that .being is a spiritual state of being even if you do not believe in the spirit or the bible or god, .will will help her to understand, with out telling her your direction. nor is it written that Jesus was a Christian in the church definition today. it is written that Christ or Jesus follow god, or his ideas. and is that not what you are doing following your way , your light your being Christ like is a state of being, not a person or a religious faith, ask her where in the bible does it say Jesus was a christian, or any faith, only that he did the will of the father, do we or any one or faith know what faith god is, no where does it say god is a Christian, or jesus ....so why should you or anyone be any more then the god or the father of this created all .... and that is a none faith ,, or simply just being...

Answer 8

I feel sure that you are kind people, who have no wish to distress an old lady, or upset the whole family.

You might try this: "We haven't decided, yet." No matter what grandmother says ("Aren't you going to Baptize Suzy Q?" "What are you going to teach her about God?" "Aren't you going to give her a Christian education?"), answer with "We haven't decided, yet."

This is courteous, but completely thwarts the question.

I wish you good luck, and I hope you can keep the goodwill of the family!

Answer 9

There are some people who are incapable of seeing things from any perspective other than their own. It sounds like she just can't conceive of anyone being non-Christian. I'm afraid that there isn't much you can do with someone like that. Her experience is apparently very limited, and she lacks the imagination to consider people who are not like her.

Answer 10

Unless she has Alzheimer's she already understands, she just doesn't want to believe. Ask your parents to make it plain to her what your wishes are on this subject. Let them know if they can't you will have to be "a little more honest" on the subject and would rather not be to someone you love of your grandmothers age, but that question is wearing on your nerves.