Am I the crazy one?

Question

Things have gotten serious with this guy I've been dating. I really care alot about him and to me he is "The One". We have this big problem with the "little things". All he has ever asked me for is complete honesty (which I have no problem giving at all). To be fair I did hold off telling him something but it was just an attempt to push him away from me as I've been burnt so many times I didn't want to face my feelings for him. I did tell him about it a couple hours after I really should have. Now he has this habit of asking me about something that happened several days prior ie. a conversation with someone. If I can't get all the details just the way it happened right or I can't remember what it was that was said at all he gets upset and thinks I'm doing it on purpose. Is there anyway I can make him see that I'm not trying to nor want to hide anything from him? Am I just crazy for even trying? Please help me.

Answer 1

Look at the answers (including mine) to Brittney's question, "Please help me . . . " (Singles & Dating, Open Question), which is also about a very intrusive, distrusting boyfriend. Your boyfriend is splashing his major neurosis on you. He is treating you like his property. He feels terrible in his own skin when he feels that you have a separate life apart from his that he does not control (that he does not know). It may not seem like it to you, but this is terribly dangerous -- if not physically, then mentally/emotionally.

The short and un-sweet of it is -- if you cared powerfully about yourself, you wouldn't put up with ten seconds of his micro-management -- not ten seconds of it.

Answer 2

Your not crazy and I can understand the being "burnt" part. I too have had it happen to me. But anyway, I mean like just keep letting him know that you can't remember and tell him that you aren't doing it on purpose. If he really loves you, he should be able to understand.

Answer 3

bricks are little things... pardon the metaphore, but they can build a house .. as long as you have mortor to bond those little bricks into a solid structure that can stand firm in wind or rain and most importantly weather the test of time. truth is that mortor. what you share and experience (details of you both) are those bricks. 2 people cant build 1 house without sharing bricks and mortor. a solid wall is a strong wall, a half assed built wall will surely fall.... Sounds like you want him to have the kind of trust in you that he would never "question" you. thats great. but thats also a fairly high "run of brick". houses are built from the bottem up.

Answer 4

NO you are not the crazy one, but it is pretty frustrating to him I am sure when he wants to here about what ever it is and you can't give him the details, or can you? Truly ask yourself if it is that you really can't member or if you don't want to remember the details and if it is that you don't really want him to know than don't bring it up. If you know that it drives him crazy then don't bring up conversations that might include what you want him to know.

Answer 5

I don't know what you didn't tell him, but it seems like you want your life an open book. I think, somethings are better left unsaid.
Have you read any Dr. Phil books? I think you both should do a relationship quiz or check. It can't hurt your relationship, only help. Hope my words helped.

Answer 6

I dont believe that you're crazy....However I DO believe you're crazy in trying to pacify his silly ego.
If communication is a problem already, it will NEVER improve. But rather become worse, with his determination in accepting only his concise rendition of prior events.

Answer 7

there is no use in trying to change him. he is like he is and your just going to have learn to live w/him. eventually he will find out that u arent trying to hide ne thing from him. but dont try and change him cause thats not a good thing to do. leave him the way he is. u fell for him for wut he is now and not for the guy u want to change him into.