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Just a little while ago my friend and I had a serious arguement, I thought things were cool but they were not, she has been going through some changes and I can understand that. I wanted to make things right with me and her but she doesn't want to talk about anything. She doesn't want to listen to reason as well as try to understand where another person is coming from.
I am getting tired of her tirades, her judgemental attitude and as well as her don't care attitude. I have washed my hands of it because it is not worth all of the problems that she is going through for me to go through it with her. So the question is what should I do when she doesn't want to listen to anybody and try to understand? Because I have tried to make my peace with it and to move on, The second thing should I stop being friends with her knowing how I feel about her as well? Please give me some good answers and nothing negitive please Thanks!

2006-07-08 04:06:35 · 17 answers · asked by beagirl40 4 in Society & Culture Religion & Spirituality

17 answers

Your heart is so beautiful. Even now hearing your pain all you truly want is to find away to make it work. You asked, "The second thing should I stop being friends with her knowing....?" If you can stop being friends with her, you were never her friend to start with. Listen to me carefully, friendship is no different than any other great relationship... marriage, courtship, etc., you have to be vested! Yes, it hurts when it's bad, but it's great when it's good.

You stated she is going through some things. It could be that all she needs from you is simply to be there. If you have done all you can, verbally, than now is the time to be there for her silently.

And above all things, take it to Christ Jesus, pour out your heart at His feet. Then trust He will do that good and holy thing. Then, be patient. But never, never, nerver give up on a true friend. Rather, pray, pray, and pray, then be faithful to the friendship, and be still, the Lord is at work.

2006-07-08 04:28:39 · answer #1 · answered by LionOfJuda 1 · 1 0

This is a tough situation to go through, and unfortunately I went through it myself last year with a close friend of mine. I had to end the friendship in order to keep my own life from falling into chaos. You need to sit back from the situation and ask yourself "is this a friendship that is helping me to grow as a person?" A healthy friendship is all about give and take, both parties involved gain from the experience and any arguments that do occur are resolved and not held over each other's head to be brought up again and again in guilt trips. If this friend is making you feel badly about yourself, or you find that you can't even think of her without getting angry, then it's time to end the friendship and move on. It's a difficult thing to do, but sometimes it has to be done. The sad thing about life is that sometimes you just out-grow a friendship.

Just make sure that you stay true to yourself, and you can't go wrong. Good luck.

2006-07-08 04:17:49 · answer #2 · answered by moonwatermuskoka 2 · 1 0

Buy two bunches of Flowers. Say a little prayer with the intention of healing this situation. Attach a note to your friend of love and care for your friendship. Leave the flowers where they will be found. Put the second bunch in a vase for yourself. Attach a note thanking your Angels for seeing you through your concerns. Then, LET GO & Let God. Your problem will be resolved with speed and satisfaction.

2006-07-08 04:22:15 · answer #3 · answered by Aunt Susan 4 · 1 0

You didn't say what you were arguing about which may or may not have a bearing on the situation.

Non the less you can not force anyone to listen who is not going to listen - and if the shoe was on the other foot (it may very well be) perhaps your friend feels you are not seeing where she is coming from.

Again - subject matter makes a big difference. Was the argument about a religious view point and if so what religion are you and what is her religion?

or was the argument about donut variety? See what I mean.

2006-07-08 04:14:07 · answer #4 · answered by Victor ious 6 · 0 0

Your friend right now is "hearing" you . She is not listening. Wait till she comes to you and when she does, if she does, after she states the problem, ask her if she is willing to "listen" to your side because if not, you will get up and go. She may be going through some things but it does not mean she has to abuse you in the meantime.

2006-07-08 04:13:27 · answer #5 · answered by proud of it 4 · 0 0

If you dont want to go through the problems with her...then you are not a true friend. That's what true friends do. YOu talk like you want to be her friend..so just give her some time. If you were meant to be freinds...forgive each other and give her some time. She will come around.

2006-07-08 04:12:09 · answer #6 · answered by classick_magick 2 · 0 0

Maybe give her some time. It is virtually impossble to reach people when they are not willing to listen. Friends are important and can be very hard to come by. Saving a true friendship is worth the effort.

2006-07-08 04:12:54 · answer #7 · answered by Paul H 2 · 0 0

In your question you keep saying that our friend "doesn't want to listen", "doesn't want to talk about anything", "doesn't want to listen to reason", "doesn't want to understand where another person is coming from". You say that she is judgmental and doesn't care.

What I don't hear you saying is anything about listening to her, and asking her earnestly why she feels the way she does.

I don't know the whole context, but I think you need to stop talking and start listening.

2006-07-08 04:12:12 · answer #8 · answered by Don M 7 · 0 0

There is a difference between agreeing to disagree and being emotionally battered with the expectation that discussion is off-limits to resolve it everytime you turn around. I would never tolerate the latter.

2006-07-08 04:12:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Sometimes it is best just not to say anything... just listen... let your friend know that your concern for her situation is only out of your concern for her as a friend. It might be hard... but sometimes you just have a say a prayer and wait until she work thing out for herself. But as long as she knows that you will be there for her... unconditional, she just might surprise you. That is my prayer for the both of you.

Life is too short... true friends are too few!!

2006-07-08 04:19:53 · answer #10 · answered by TheBookLady 1 · 0 0

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