I was put in a group with a guy at uni and we had to swap numbers. He immediatly started texting me and putting lots of kisses on the end even though I didn't know him. I answered a few to be polite. After our group presentation I assumed he'd stop but he started asking me to send him pictures and if I didn't text back he would send panicky messages asking why I wasn't talking to him. I got a boyfriend and told him when I next saw him but he still sends me messages. He has sent me about 6 in the last couple of months which I have ignored but he sent me another a couple of days ago in the middle of the night asking how I was with loads of kisses on the end and asking me to text back. I thought he would have got the picture my now. My boyfriend wants to have a word with him but I don't want it to be awquard if I'm put in a group with him next year. What shal I do?
2006-07-08 01:25:10 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Something similar happened to me once not so long ago. I exchanged numbers with a guy I didn't know very well but liked. He texted me once to wish me a nice time on holiday, but then kept asking me when I would be back, when I would go out with him and when he was going to get a snog. It just became really irritating. To make it worse he started calling me Babe, which I hate (I told him I was not an animated pig and did not appreciate being compared to one so he stopped) The list of frustrating things goes on. In addition, like you, he kept asking me why I wasn't talking to him.
You have three options in my humble opinion.
1)You continue as you have done, and ignore all his texts. He will give up eventually.
2) You specifically ask him to stop texting you and to leave you alone. This worked for me, with the comment that "Well at least I know now" I haven't heard from Matt the Muppet (as I started calling him amongst my friends) since then.
3) You change your number and tell everybody except him.
If this doesn't work, talk to your tutors and see can they have a word with him. Failing that you could talk to the police and see can they do him for harassment. You would need to keep the texts or some sort of documentary evidence though for them to act on this.
Good luck
2006-07-08 01:35:38 · answer #1 · answered by Eleanora 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Christina, I had some similar problem where someone was sending me lots of messages which started off very complimentary and sweet, but changed to become threatening and abusive, then they stopped completely. After a break of a few months they reappeared and as I was reluctant to change my contact details just because I was being intimidated, I simply sent a very sweet message saying that I felt very sorry for them because obviously they needed some psychological help, and also that I had informed the police of the problem, although in reality I hadn't. The mere threat of possible police intervention was enough to frighten the person, and it all stopped immediately, and I've heard nothing since. The funny thing is I've never been completely certain who it was in fact, although I had a couple of ideas I was never sure enough to be able to go and confront the person face-to-face, which made it all the more frustrating. It's a pity to threaten, but sometimes it's the only way to make the person sit up and see what a nuisance they are. I wish you luck, but don't be intimidated into changing your number or contact details to solve the problem, in these cases I find words can speak louder than actions :) Anna V
2006-07-08 08:41:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anna V 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a text stalker who was a girl from my old Literature Class in High school last year who claimed she was in love with me. At the peak of it, she sent me around 45 messages a day, many of them saying if I didn't reply she would slit her wrists and other terribly traumatic things of the like. I ended up calling my mobile provider and requesting a number change. Surprisingly it was really easy and it didn't cost anything extra. The person also told me that there was a way to block incoming calls and texts from numbers, but i changed my whole numer just to be sure. It's a very scary experience.
2006-07-08 08:34:42 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not answer another text. Tell your uni you are having this problem and you want to change groups. Explain the problem to them. If they don't take action against this person, inform the police. You have to make them stop. If not it may esculate into something more serious. This person obviously has a troubled mind. Take action for yourself. Do not think that they will stop of their own accord. Be responsible for your own safety.
2006-07-08 08:33:24 · answer #4 · answered by chrchrbrt 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that seems wrong that you had to give out your number to someone you didn't necessarily want to - your university shouldn't really be doing that i don't think. you could tell your tutor about it, or mention it at your student welfare office, or tell someone in your student union. there should an unembarrassing alternative to giving out your number.
but that still leaves you with a problem.
you could change your card, but that might be a real pain - i know i wouldn't like to do it.
you could talk to him again. ask him to stop texting you. talk to him with a friend of yours (maybe not your boyfriend though if you're worried he might get angry), and just make it short and sweet.
then talk to your tutor and ask that you not be put in a group with him to avoid any awkwardness for you.
if you're scared at all, you should talk to your student welfare office, or student union. i bet they will have met this kind of situation before, and will have useful advice.
2006-07-08 08:37:10 · answer #5 · answered by jessica 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people cant understand when hints are being dropped. This guy doesnt understand why you are not replying to his texts in then way he wants you to. Next time he sends a text, jus text him back saying that you dont want to be friends with him. Sometimes it is better to be straightforward than aversive.
2006-07-08 08:34:15 · answer #6 · answered by freeandyoung786 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep ignoring him. He will go away.I had this problem and it took ages. If he start's being a real pain again you could save the texts and go to the police. In the past few years they've introduced laws to deal with stalkers and they will be able to aid you.
Good luck and remember he's probably very lonely.
2006-07-08 15:34:44 · answer #7 · answered by samanthajanecaroline 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Block the number if your phone allows it. If not, get a new phone.
If he goes on being a pest, report him to your tutor, you don't have to put up with this sh*t. I know you are obviously a nice person and want to be polite and not rock the boat but don't feel you have to be nice to him - he isn'e being respectful to you.
Equally don't get into a position where your boyfriend could get into trouble by getting into a fight, he's not worth it.
2006-07-08 08:30:30 · answer #8 · answered by charleymac 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just ignore him. He will soon tire and u should allow ur boyfriend to have a word. He might end up beating him up though depending what sort of man he is
2006-07-10 13:16:52 · answer #9 · answered by spaced-out 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Report it to your phone company. They should be able to ban the number from texting ur phone. Your handset may be able to ban the number. Call customer services for advice.
2006-07-08 08:32:11 · answer #10 · answered by vic 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋