I am 10 years older than my niece who lives with my mum and dad. she wants me to talk them into letting her date. I dont think she is old enough. she isnt really mature at all, i have explained this to her but can not get her to understand shes too young and theres plenty of time for boys. she wants total freedom to do what she wants and is being a brat about it. we usually get along i am like the big sister/aunt but we fight on this.
2006-07-08 01:04:47 · 24 answers · asked by burrowthroughanelephant 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
A person at this age will often times experience mental confusion as a result of hormonal influences on thier bodies. Thoughts of adulthood and the almost insatiable yearning for it are common pplace. It is very important that adolesents have an authority figure in thier lives to develop boundries for them.We have seen many examples of the chaos that can result in a childs life when left to thier own devices.
This will take a consorted effort on the parts of you and your parents. It is critical for any child who has been displaced to receive not only an extra measure of love from the people in her new surroundings but very clear boundries so that they will feel at ease with the new living space. If things begin to look like they are getting out of control for you, be kind but firm. It is imperative to this childs future that you three hold fast to what you have decided is best for this child. Gods best to all of you.
2006-07-08 01:28:25 · answer #1 · answered by Francis M 1 · 4⤊ 2⤋
I think a compromise would work for everyone involved. Let her have a date but drop her off to public places like the cinemas or cafe and pick her up at an agreed time. If you say no all together she will sneak around. Supervise without holding her hand. She will appreciate the trust and will probably behave well. She would most likely only hold hands and kiss anyway. No harm in that. Dating at 13 dose not mean having sex.....at least it didn't when i was 13.
2006-07-08 01:09:06 · answer #2 · answered by vmmc_64 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good luck!! At about that age kids seem to know everything for a few years. You are doing the right thing. 13 is way to young to "date". However, kids don't always do what they are supposed to. I would let your parents know what is going on so they can prepare for the future with her. Granted they raised children and know what to do, but they should know that she is thinking so much of boys. Some girls go really wild, you know, and do lots of stupid things at a very young age. Maybe they need to start keeping a closer eye on her for a while.
When she talks to you about this, stand firm like you have been. Good luck!!
2006-07-08 01:16:26 · answer #3 · answered by josie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is 13 - alot of kids start going out on "dates" so to speak, when they are 13 - this doesn't mean she is having sex - or wants to - she may just want to go to a movie or mcdonalds with a boy, or maybe even a group of friends. Just be careful, and make sure you know who she is with, where they are going, and what they are doing. Ask ALOT of questions. You could even go along as a chaperone. Drive them and pick them up or stay with them if you decide to. Tell her that's a compromise and if she wants to date then you'd have to be there too. May I ask where the girl's mother is?
2006-07-08 01:26:34 · answer #4 · answered by TellMeMore 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's definitely too young to be dating, but you won't be able to convince her of that sadly. Hopefully her parents will restrict her from this for a few years, or they could go along on the date with her, although she won't like that one bit either. It's all part of the horror story that is adolescence. We all come to that time in life that we have to make choices that can ultimately effect our future lives.. Hopefully she will get through it without too many mistakes, but I don't think too many ppl get through totally unscathed.
2006-07-08 01:15:17 · answer #5 · answered by Jill 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
13yrs is to early for such stuffs. Although u tried ur level best but still unable to succeed. But never lose hope n go on trying to stop her from engaging herself into these matter. Explain her that its really not good to date at such a young age. She is just a kid n tell her to enjoy her life with her pals n not engage herself in dating matters.
2006-07-08 01:43:27 · answer #6 · answered by Angel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is it a one on one date or a group date?
that's a tough one.
Hmmmm, I got it!!! Take her to the welfare office, show her the trashy skank with the 3 little kids and tell her this is what happens to 13 yr olds that date that young and tell her the skank is only 16.
2006-07-08 01:09:48 · answer #7 · answered by Munya Says: DUH! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to be eager (At 14+) to get into the dating pool. Even my mom couldn't coax me out of obstinacy; I remember how much I used to dread and hate those talks. "What a load of bullshit; You don't understand me; All my friends have a boyfriend!" are just some of the excuses your niece might've familiarized herself with.
After some nasty experiences with men, I decided to screw true love, and do what I want. Sometimes, you got to learn it the hard way.
2006-07-08 01:09:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Holding a child back at this age will only make them want it and rebel more.try what i did with my daughter,she is 14 and still not allowed to go on a date solo.So she invites her guy friend to our house,they can watch movies,or play games,while being supervised.This gives her a chance to know how to act around boys in a controlled environment.Good luck God bless:O)
2006-07-08 01:08:37 · answer #9 · answered by melissa_froggies 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you ask this question means that you know the answer already.
You should remember what it's like at that age but you know your not gonna stop her from doing what she wants. All you can do is be there to guide and watch over her, especially when things get bad.
2006-07-08 01:09:06 · answer #10 · answered by jewel_o_th_night 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋