Famliy Fight, any advise?

Question

Im moving to CA, and i have to stay @ my Uncles house for 3 days. Thats alright cuz my cuz lives there thats my age. but the thing is, me and my uncle hate each other. last time i came to visit, i only packed capreez, (he dosn't allow my cuz 2 wear shorts) shirts with sleavz, (that either, sucks ) and toned down my make up. And he yelled @ me for been such a bad example. but the truth is my cuz is sooo bad. and he thinks that she is perfect. he just thinks that my famliy is bad because we have a life. i mean he dosn't even le mary (my cuz) listen to the radio, and when she was little he wouldn't let her go trick or treating!!!

well any ways heres the point so last time i visated he yelled @ me and ran 2 his room, the next day he spent the whole day out side avoinding me till i left. its been about 3 months, and i don't know what to do about the whole thing, how do i avoid seen him? or @ least this been an awkward visit.. go* i can't stand him. and he feel the same way about me.

Answer 1

I know you both dont like each other but try, since its just for 3 days , to do your best to keep the peace. I know his rules are insane and over the top, but you can get through this for 3 days. Hang in there and do your best for your parents. We all have to sacrifice our feelings sometimes to keep the peace. Hang in there kiddo, youll make it through. :)

Answer 2

Even though you probably don't want to hear this, you are going into his home. He has rules and restrictions, and feels that because you are his family and you should also abide for his rules. It is only 3 days. So suck it up and have fun. Try not to think about what happened on your previous visit. If he says something tell him that you are sorry for what happened last time, (rediculous as it seems) and that you will abide by his rules to the best of your ability. You will be a better person for it.

Answer 3

I don't think you should stay there. Have you ever heard of these trite but true sayings: "A man is the king of his castle," or "When in Rome, do as the Romans do." The only way you can stay there is to apologize to him for the way YOU acted the last time you were a GUEST in HIS HOUSE and abide by his rules. Right or wrong, it's his house and your cousin's father and their lives. I'm sure you wouldn't like them coming into your home and telling your family how to live.

Answer 4

Your uncle sounds like a pharisee. I am assuming he is pentecostal. I am apostolic and faith and I would be happy to help him see the light concerning some of the "standards" you mentioned. My email address is [e-mail].

As for your visit, just try to stay away from him as much as possible. If you are staying at his home you are pretty much obliged to live by his rules. But since it is only three days, I'm sure you will survive.
Here is one thing that might help (a scripture) - "A soft answer turns away wrath". Try it, it works.

Answer 5

you truly favor to get faraway from this guy as rapidly as achievable. he's way too controlling and possessive. it receives worse, and the undeniable actuality that he's already displayed actual violence in the direction of you is scary. that still will proceed, no count how a lot he apologizes and says he did not propose it each and each and every time. that's a progression with an excellent style of abusive people. The abuse and then an apology, persistently. also, in case you split with him and he gained't leave you on my own, you may want to judge a restraining order. I had a boyfriend in extreme college who become very a lot an same way because the guy you're describing. I broke up with him, yet I later realized he beat up his spouse so undesirable that she had a miscarriage. in simple terms is going to teach you what those adult males can become.

Answer 6

hey girl do not be that worried. i had the same type of life.
the best thing to do is to go to your uncle and ask him why he behaves that way towards you. he should have a reason of doing that. i am sure you haven't discussed this with your parents tell them everything. it might be difficult but telling them i am sure you shall feel relieved.
they shall understand you and try to speak with your uncle. i am sure everything will turn out well i pray for you. communication is what lacks the most in all families having some time for communication solves everything.

Answer 7

Try to see things more from your uncle's point of view. He might have been trying to get you to be a bit more modest in your dress. I know it seems to you like it sucks, but remember, he knows more about what goes on in boys' minds than you. :o) Maybe he knows there's a reason why your dress needs to be more modest and is trying to keep you safe.

If he avoids you, try to do some little nice things for him if you can. Being nice to someone who is mean to you often brings them around and helps them to see how they are treating you. If you can't do nice things for him, you can always pray for him.

Answer 8

His house, his rules. Suck it up while you're there and try to get along. Sorry, as it sounds like your visit is going to be spent walking on egg shells around your uncle. I hope it turns out ok for you. Good luck!

Answer 9

well, i'd say step back a minute and look at what it might be. Your uncle definitely has some strong ideas, and, sounds like he is at the same time rather insecure.
so, how to respect him, as your elder relative, and love him, as your uncle, and make a positive difference?
think about it....
and i hope you do well for these 3 days

Answer 10

This man is a relative and you are staying in his house. It wouldn't kill you to live by his rules for 3 days, just suck it up.

Answer 11

You JUST answered it-- it's YOUR attitude (even though it's his, too). Start with YOUR attitude. It's HIS family, tho. I wonder what it will be like when YOU get older and raise your children ONE way, to have a 'cuz' come over and do whatever you did.

Three days isn't THAT long. I agree with Sparklingb,..