2006-07-07 14:40:58 · 41 answers · asked by johnny5loves 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Are you serious about the relationship? Do you love her? Are you willing to accept that the kid is going to come first before you? Do you like kids? Could you get used to having the kid around all the time? Would you be able to have a good relationship with someone else's kid?
Don't go into it lightly. It is hard enough on a kid having a single mother without having all kinds of drama around.
2006-07-07 14:43:57 · answer #1 · answered by I Know Nuttin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should ask yourself this question again and go with your gut feeling on this one. You are the only one that will have to be in a relationship with this woman. It's easy for you to get many opinions here, but it all boils down to what you truly feel comfortable with. Some men don't want to take on another man's kid, while others don't mind this. It's all about how you feel inside. Remember don't deny things to yourself because the truth is always underneath everything. It's all about making yourself happy. I'm sure right now you know the answer to your own question. I wish you luck either way!!!
2006-07-07 14:54:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only if you both think that it will last. There is nothing worse than having a child see every Tom, Dick, & Hairy that walks through the door. It's not good to try to establish something with that child if you are not going to stay. The child may get attached to you & feel abandoned if you leave. If you date someone that has children, be sure that if the kids are around, the both of you are in "friend" mode. When the kids are asleep then pursue intimacy.
2006-07-07 14:47:33 · answer #3 · answered by avandachi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A few questions:
1. What do you want from the relationship?
2. Does this woman meet your criteria?
3. Is there room for a child in the plan?
4. Is the woman a good balanced mom?
5. Is the child likeable?
If you answered no to any of the above, reconsider.
2006-07-07 14:46:05 · answer #4 · answered by maynerdswife 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel you are emotionally and financcially able and mature enough to deal with it. You need to make sure that you are really compatible with the lady and the child. It's awful to get close and then decide to walk away later because you don't want a relationship, because it wasn't what you were expecting. It's especially emotionally damaging on the child if things don't work out. My brother has been married four times, and with each wife, with exception to his current one, he has adopted children that weren't biologically his. He found out the hard way that you are more legally obligated financially to continue to support them than you would have been had they actually been blood related. Needless to say, he has ended up paying literally hundreds of thousands of dollars on child support to kids that don't even belong to him. He got kinda angry when I told him that he would be far better off financially if he never married again, if he just went out every four to five years, found a woman that he hated and buy her a house!lol. Just be careful.
2006-07-07 14:50:02 · answer #5 · answered by loviesteele 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To ask a question such as this, it implies doubt. Where there is doubt, there is very little chance that the relationship will work out. If you go ahead and try this relationship, please bear in mind that the child may be the one that suffers the most if the relationship ends. I would say be very careful, only because it sounds as though your heart is not in it.
2006-07-07 14:45:47 · answer #6 · answered by littleflower_57 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on how old the kid is. I say if the kid is over 4, saves a lot of mess work
2006-07-07 14:42:16 · answer #7 · answered by t79188231 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say just become friends first and see if you can stand being in that life. and make sure you are ready to accept the child into your life just as much as her because that kid will be a huge part of her life and will need much attention. But she has needs too. I'm sure that it won't be too big a hinderance if you don't let it be.
2006-07-07 14:43:09 · answer #8 · answered by whyohcruelworld 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are muture enoughand the ex...is clear and gone, you don;t mind bringing him onm the weekends to see his pops,she is devoted to you with no hang ups on the ex... You can disapline the child when needed (very important, some mothers wont let you) don't see why not. I have a friend(tow of them ) that are in those relationships...they gotton married,bought homes and no problems...
2006-07-07 14:45:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. If you are serious about this woman, then the kid shouldn't be a barrier, and if you aren't, you know that she puts out already.
Addendum: If the father is still around and in the woman's life, run, don't walk, to the exit.
2006-07-07 14:43:57 · answer #10 · answered by Jimee77 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋