2006-07-07 14:35:44 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
My favorite, as stolen from This Wedsite Stinks! the Tony Kornheiser fan site:
Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he never cries.
2006-07-07 14:41:59 · answer #1 · answered by lucyanddesi 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
ChuckNorris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity ¦ twice.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris¦ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn¦t lifting himself up, he¦s pushing the Earth down.
2006-07-07 14:43:27 · answer #2 · answered by His 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when chuck jumps into the water he dosnt get wet the water gets chuck norrised
what is the best way to get to a mans heart
a round house kick to the chest by chuck norris
why was earth created
because chuck norris got bored
chuck norris watched broke back mountain not because hes gay its because it you ever judge his straightness hell give you a roundhouse kick to the face
2006-07-07 15:24:51 · answer #3 · answered by Mickey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you know that Chuck Norris is suing the TV show Law & Order because those are the patented names for his right and left hook?
2006-07-07 14:39:01 · answer #4 · answered by marimbaman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chuck Norris is driving his five year old to a friend’s house when another car races in front and cuts them off, nearly causing an accident. "Douchebag!" the father yells. A moment later he realizes the indiscretion, pulls over, and turns to face his son. "Your father just said a bad word," he says. "I was angry at that driver, but that was no excuse for what I said. It was wrong. But just because I said it, it doesn’t make it right, and I don’t ever want to hear you saying it. Is that clear?" His son looks at him and says: "Too late, douchebag."
2006-07-09 01:30:16 · answer #5 · answered by Wolfie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When God has an orgasm, he screams "Oh my Chuck Norris!"
Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
2006-07-07 16:14:14 · answer #6 · answered by kayc 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not sure if they're good, but here's some:
Chuch Norris does not sleep; He waits.
Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
For more, go here: http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
2006-07-07 14:39:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, watch Walker Texas Ranger- it is the longest-running joke on TV
2006-07-07 14:52:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck norris?
2006-07-07 14:44:43 · answer #9 · answered by jennitelya 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
chuck norris is a redneck.
p.s. - i wish bruce lee's corpse would rise from the dead to kick his @ss one last time.
2006-07-07 14:40:35 · answer #10 · answered by Friendly Neighbor 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋