Ive fallen for a guy ive been seeing the last 4 mths, he didnt bother getting me a card or a present for my birthday yesterday. He said he had forgotten his own sisters birthday and will get me a present and his handwritting is terrible to give me a card. I would never do that and now think he couldnt careless about me. He knew i was upset today but ive just phoned him and hes in bournemouth with his work mates which is miles away, am i expecting too much????? I dont know what to do im falling for him and i think he cares by what he says to me but i dont know now.
2006-07-07 11:28:43 · 33 answers · asked by ? 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
move on girl
2006-07-07 11:32:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Definitely communicate your feelings. Never keep things festering because that will really kill a relationship. Find out if he has the same feelings for you or if he is just thinking of you in the short-term.
Warning! Guys CANNOT READ MINDS. Some can be very good at thinking ahead and remembering when they scored brownie points for doing things they know have pleased other women in their lives and some are really organized about birthdays and anniversaries and special events or that song that was on the radio when you first... kissed.
Consider all the things you like about this guy and all the things that bug you. Imagine living with them for the next 40 years. You have to decide if you want to invest the only life you know about with him or not.
Incidentally, he should have put you first over his mates on your birthday. His mates should have understood. If they can't, the whole lot of them are insensitive and should get 100 lashes with a wet noodle! Birthdays are a special time that should be shared if there are the makings of a relationship. This may be a sign of his feelings or he may be genuinely forgetful.
By the way, HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!!!!!
P. S. About the handwriting. My Father sent my Mother a hand written love letter many many years ago. To this day, neither of them can actually read what it says. But they still have it, and the feelings it was written with.
2006-07-07 11:50:17 · answer #2 · answered by NotsoaNonymous 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are two parts to how a man lets you know he really likes you, by what he says and by what he does.
If he tells you that he likes you but doesn't remember even a "happy birthday" kiss or phone call. Then something is a little off. Im also a little worried that you were the one to do the phoning when he knew you were upset about it. This all sounds a little one-sided. You deserve more than excuses about lousy handwriting or bad memory. Ive seen men pull off miracles when they really loved a woman ( fly to an entirely different country for example ), remembering a day thats important to you should be at the top of his list.
2006-07-07 11:52:45 · answer #3 · answered by luckybluebunny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some guys are terrible with remembering important dates, so don't feel bad about that. Don't worry about the handwriting, if he gives you a card, that's great. If he's with his work buddies, let him have some guy time, just like you need girl time.
Just calmly let him know how you felt about not getting anything on your birthday, say "that's ok, I understand that it might have slipped your mind". "Hey, no one's perfect". "At least you got me this card". (when and if)
My birthday, my boyfriend was supposed to come over and didn't, didn't even call until hours later. When he did, he was like, "sorry", but I had had enough. I said that his words were meaningless because he didn't back them up.
Don't let one mistake ruin this good thing, and don't expect him to change overnight. If you really want to be with him, learn to grow with him. Place a calendar on the fridge and circle important dates with a big red marker, put a smile next to them though, so it doesn't seem overbearing.
2006-07-07 11:43:04 · answer #4 · answered by AutumnGirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am going to say this from painful experience, Cut your losses now, even though you are falling for him it will be harder to go through months, even years of let down and heartace. I can promise you that right now he is not the caring person that you think he is, I beleive that guys can say anything, things that make you think they love you, but I know these are just words, a persons actions speak alot louder than words. You deserve to be love by someone that will show he loves you in both ways. I mean it is just like you said, when you care about someone you would NEVER do that to them, then why should you let someone do it to you. Please don't waste time with someone that will only become more selfish as you put up with their selfishness. I wasted so long, I wonder sometimes who I might have missed out on.
2006-07-07 11:36:13 · answer #5 · answered by jazzie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, my husband and I have been married for 10 yrs this year... and, he has forgotten my birthday a couple of times.
I'd say - on his birthday; buy him some sort of organizer and make sure your b-day is marked. ;) LOL! My hubby has to program his phone to remind him about me.
Birthdays are not a huge deal to me, when you are a kid its fun... but, when you are older - its a bit childish.
You have not been with him long. Who knows how he was raised. Maybe birthdays were not played up big in his family - so perhaps he does not realize it has hurt you that he did not get you anything....
As you get to know him better; you will see how his family is and how he has been raised...
I would talk to him and explain to him how you feel, and see what he says. Communication is the key. If you don't have that, you don't have 'nothin.
2006-07-07 11:34:56 · answer #6 · answered by Patti 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you? Sounds like you're between 12 and 15.. You're upset because someone you like didn't buy you a present and a card? You think he couldn't careless about you? I couldn't care less about either of you. When you're thinking about the present you didn't get, think about the people around the world who won't have anything to eat today; or the kids dying of thirst or disease, and then grow up and stop being so bloody stupid and selfish.
2006-07-07 12:15:09 · answer #7 · answered by emjay1212001 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is an answer from my 7yr old little sis- U need to spy on him and follow him every where to make sure he's not doing anything bad like dateing another woman.
from the real Lovely Woman- p.s. Sorry but she really wanted to answer a q.
answer from the real Lovley Woman - U need to sit down him a straight up ask him what is up. Do u care about me or not!!! Whatever he says just look him in the i and ask him again to make sure
2006-07-07 11:39:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldnt worry about it too much yet. You really havnt provieded any information about your releatonship other than him forgeting the card, which could be an honest mistake. You should consider that, and also consider that no one on Yahoo Answer will really be able to answer your question because no one knows you or your relationship. No one knows how he acts all the time around you, or really anything about him, or you for that matter. You should consider this in looking for answers on Yahoo.
2006-07-07 11:35:19 · answer #9 · answered by kingpenguin_2006 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he couldn't make the effort to get your card, remember your birthday, or even get you a small present, he isn't worth your time. Get rid of him, and find you someone that will treat you right.
2006-07-07 11:37:02 · answer #10 · answered by Rob K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy is into spending time with his mates.. Stop wasting your time.. Stop calling him and see what happens. If he wants you make him work for it.. Somtimes this actually will make a guy more agressive toward the relationship.. Trust me, I am a guy.. But don't set your heart on it, I think this guy still wants to play with the boys.
2006-07-07 11:33:22 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋