Is this the end of my relationship??

Question

my boyfriend and i have been dating almost 1.5 years now. last year his job required him to travel about every other week for about 3 months and he would only be gone 2-3 nights a week and be home. now this year they are requiring him to travel all of the US and now outside the US to hawaii and Canada for four days or more weekly. he is also starting a business up of his own and he is going to have to travel many weekends for the next year to promote and make connections for his business. he says it is too busy for me to go with him right now on his personal trips for his business and i cannot go on his work related trips of course. he has only asked that i just be patient and hang in there until all this is over with. he says he is doing this so we will be able to be closer and spend more time together because his business he is starting up on his own will give us more time. i was wondering, how do i deal with the sadness/missing him and how do i be supportive? is it worth it?

Answer 1

I guess it depends on how strong you are in the relationship. Your relationship isn't that much different than the women w/ their spouses in the military. I should know, I'm one of them and so are my mom and sister. It takes a strong personality to handle the stress of him leaving and moving about. Here is what you need to ask yourself. Do you think your boyfriend and your relationship is worth keeping? Do you feel that his work and new business will really benefit you and your relationship in the long run? Do you trust his character? Do you keep in contact (no matter how brief)? Does he try to make time with you even though it's limited? Has he done anything to say that he's sorry about all this but tries to make it up to you whenever he can?
If he tries to make it up to you by spending what little time he has or shows you that he loves you despite his crazy schedule then this relationship might be worth it.
Make sure you keep in contact just so you don't grow too far apart. Keep on with your life, job, school, friend, family, just keep busy. But only you can answer this question: Do I love him enough to stay in the this relationship and benefit from this growing experience?
Good luck.

Answer 2

Ask yourself this--say you leave him for good--How will you feel?? Sad and lonely?? Of course you will--This man sounds like he is a hard worker and has a good sense of business--he isn't out in the bars or selling drugs--you have a good guy--Ever heard the term " Absence makes the heart grow fonder?" Its true you know --my husband travelled for years and worked hard we talked everyday and sometimes he was gone for 20 or more days--when he came home ?? It was like a honey moon all over again --dinners, the hugs, the long conversations --its hard at first to get used to but then its not --you just make sure you have your girlfriends at hand to chat with and have lunch etc. Be positive towards his business getting off the ground ask him if there is any way you can help..get involved as much as possible and that will help you both connect--its pretty black and white he sees a future with you by his comments I would be happy and excited to know that--so be happy life is long and also too short not to think of better times coming your way ....And yes it is worth it IF you really LOVE HIM and WANT a FUTURE

Answer 3

Only you can know if it is worth it, if he's the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning, if he truely makes you feel infinite. Then of course it is worth it to stand by him. As for what you can do to avoid sadness, I would get involved in something productive for you, yoga, dance classes, cooking. Also plan trips, or volunteer with little kids, they have quite a way of making you feel important. Bottom line, it is only the end if you don't have trust.....

Answer 4

My ex went through the same thing you are going through. He just got fed up with it and now look, he is my ex. I quit my job to be with him, but it was a little to late. I lost the love of my life and probably won't get him back. I realized how much of a strain I was putting on our relationship, if I were in his shoes, I would have done the same thing. You cant wait forever. The sadness will always be there and you will eventually get sick of it, that I promise. But if its not too much longer to wait, and you honestly love him, then it's worth it!!!

Answer 5

as long as he is a trustful guy i am sure he is worth it. If he is the type that would cheat i dont think it would be worth it. He has reason for what he is doing so I am sure things will be ok. Just keep in mind when your missing him or sad that things will turn into the good in the end.

Answer 6

If he is doing "personal" weekend trips...chances are he is doing someone else other than you...MOVE ON!! No business requires all weekend of "making connections" unless of course, those connections are of the "opposite" sex and if they are business related, maybe its because he is buying something... ;)

Answer 7

I think you know your friend the best. You have to make decision - you trust him and spend great time with him when he is in the city and you accept the situation for the time being and welcome him with smile. Or you do not. I think if you love each other it's worth to wait. And about feeling sad - I know it doesnt replace him but maybe find few hobbies - go to aerobic, movie theater, do all the stuff, you didn't have time for earlier.

Answer 8

I honestly don't know. If you feel that you are drifting apart then maybe it wasn't meant to be. I understand that you are trying to be supportive but when your in a competitive field like your boyfriends in, it is very taxing. Well, I hope you can stay together, I really do.

Answer 9

if you love him, you will stay by his side. things are going to get rough but you have to have trust, faith and be patient. try to do things to keep your self busy while he is gone. think of one of your old habits or if you like to work out do that.

Answer 10

if he loves you and you love him and hes making the big bucks hell yes its worth it.