daughter has not shown that she is capable of caring for her son what do I do?

Question

She smokes while holding the bay he is only 8 weeks old. will drop him off for days at a time with out calling to check up on him. She has him living in a drug house with friends of hers the baby father is in jail for making drugs and selling them and sexual asslit. we have called family services but till the baby is harmed, they wonn't do any thing. as grand parents we are scarried for his life. please I need any ideas?

Answer 1

Call CPS, and file for custody of the baby. You are the only ones that can protect your grandchild. Or the other thing you could do is file an unfit parent complaint. Check with your local attonerys office to find out how you can go about doing this

Answer 2

I am a case manager for the Tennessee Department of Children Services. How old is the child? Does the child have any special needs or disabilities? When you say "drug house" what exactly do you mean? What type of drugs are the friends using? Is the mother using drugs? Unfortunately, Children Services can only respond if the mother is putting the child in harm's way. Her leaving the child with you is not harmful, just bad parenting. If you are safe and stable, then Children Services does not consider the mother leaving the child with you as neglectful....no matter how long she might be gone. As for the drug house, Children Services will only respond if the drugs that are being used around the child is meth. That is because the fumes from meth are extremely harmful to all that is around. The smoke from pot will not necessarily harm the child. If the mother and/or the friends are leaving their drug paraphernalia around where the child has access and could grab it or put it in he/she mouth, then that is a problem. Also, if the drugs are keeping the mother from providing the child with it's basic needs, such as food, water, shelter, and supervision. If that is not the case, then the drug issue is a police matter. Unfortunately, Children Services cannot regulate "bad" parenting. We just legally can't make a mother be a "good" mother. We can only intervene when she either harms her child or creates a situation to where her child is going to be harmed. One option to chose is that whenever you are aware that the mother is allowing drug use around the child, call the police. Ask them to do a "welfare" check on the child. When they get to the home, if they find evidence of drug use, then they will call a children services worker and have a worker sent to the home asap. Also, if the mother is going to leave her child with you for days at a time, you could go to your local juvenile court and petition for custody of the child. I hope this is at least a little bit helpful to you. Good luck.

Answer 3

I am not sure what state you live in. But the best thing to do is try and catch this in the act take pictures take a video camera and tape the drugs in the house... Take your evidence to a judge and request temporary custody, Or if you daughter doesn't want the child go to her ask her for temporary custody till she is ready to be a mother.. Our cps here is the same one. A Friend of mine would call on her sister all the time, they did nothing because neither of her children ever got hurt about a month later she was giving her children a bath decided to leave them in there and one drowned. Its pretty sad that you have to wait for a child to be harmed before they will do something about it.. Just make sure that you have plenty of evidence and get yourself a lawyer... There are so many out there that would be happy to take your case.. Good luck to you and its a shame that your daughter isn't being the mother her child needs her to be. Also if you are at the house or Know when something is happening illegally you need to call the cops and get them into trouble. I know it is going to be hard to send your flesh and blood to jail but maybe that is what she needs right now. And when she decides to drop baby off and not come back for days you need to call and report abandonment the more you complain the more that will get done before its to late. Good luck to you!!! I wish you the best.

Answer 4

Okay, you said that you have called social services. I work in social work and I know that every call to cps has to be investigated. Every call is given a priority. The ones with high priority will be visited within 24 hrs. They are the ones that cps feels that the child is in immediate danger. Maybe you need to speak with a supervisor at CPS. Maybe they didn't get the full seriousness of the situation. CPS takes children out of homes everyday even if the child has not been physically harmed. Keep calling and calling. Don't give up until they investigate to your expectations. If that doesn't work, call the cops. Find a child advocacy center in your area for advice. Don't give up. The time and effort will be worth your grandchilds life! Good Luck

Answer 5

I'm not sure what the laws are in your state but I do know that grandparents do have rights. Unfortunately, it sounds as though your daughter is not putting the welfare of her child first and this needs to be dealt with. It has been done, quite often, that grandparents gain custody of a grandchild until the time when the mother is deemed fit by the court. I am so sorry that you are going through this and that your daughter is leading an unhealthy and destructive journey. My prayer is that she will get help and realize how this lifestyle is not only harming herself but her child. I also pray, as a grandmother also, that you will be able to do what is necessary to help both your grandchild and your daughter. Remember, your daughter is probably not a bad person, she is living her journey the way she knows how at this time in her life. Do not abandon her but love her with "tough love". God bless and good grace to you and all involved.

Answer 6

As her mother I would take the initiative. Take the baby from her. She knows damn well she can't take care of that baby. I think it's a cry for help doing what she does. Family services should be doing something. Lie to them and tell them you think the baby is being harmed so they will go out and see where she lives and how she takes care of the baby. Do what you have to do to get someone involved or else your grandchild might not be around for much longer. Good Luck!

Answer 7

Have a chat with your daughter and tell her everythng that is on her mind. Tell her you will take your grandchild from her and raise him yourself. That is no way for a baby to be raised. If he stays there, he will turn into the people who he is around most of the time. That is no good. We need less of those people, so talk to family services again and explain that he is being harmed with second hand smoke and his life is in danger and you want him out of there BEFORE something happens to him, not AFTER!!!!!! You don't want it to be too late, do you? If worse comes to worse, take her to court for custody of the child. I am sure the judge will rule in your favor! Good Luck!

Answer 8

Alright love... calm down. What you need to do is flat out take the baby.. when she comes to get him... tell her NO.. and if she doesn't like it she can call the police.. when the police get there, they will want to knwo why yo are not willing to give her daugther her child.. You tell them.. or legally.......what you need to do is put a motion in the court to obtain rights and guardianship... on what grounds? Neglect and the propostition of harm. Here in KY you can call the Child Protective Services Dept. and make a complaint aynonmously.... tell them that you know of a 8wk old child that is not being properly taken care of.. the mother is homesless, on drugs and is living in a crackout with the mother. If you have to make up something! Anything ot get the ball started to roll.. I wish ill will on NO one... but children are innocent in the world.. they known nothing can cannot defend themselves....

protect your grandchild... go what you have to...

Answer 9

The child is left for days at a time with who??

Child welfare service are required by law to investigate each concern.
They must respond to the childs home and conduct a cursory investigation to evaluate if the child is in danger or is suffering from neglect. The things that they will look at are whether there is food in the cupboards, if the child has an acceptable place to sleep, and overall cleanliness. if drugs are in plain view at the time of the investigation, this will be taken into consideration.

unfortunately smoking around the child, having a faterh who is incarcerated for felony charged is not enough for them to step in.

Answer 10

If you are willing to take the baby, you can petition the court for custody based on the fact she is an unfit mother. Even if they won't give you custody, they may give you temporary custody pending the mother straighten up. I have an 8 week old nephew and cannot fathom what you must be going through. Good luck to you, the baby, and even your daughter.