ok i have practically no self-confidence. i get nervous around guys and i dont stand out in the crowd. i am like really outgoing when i am just with my friends. but when i get the chance to talk to the guy i like, i dont wanna say somthing stupid around him so i barely talk at all. i feel like i am in my shell most of the time. and most of all... i feel fat when i am like shopping at Hollister or somewhere cuz i see these girls wearing a size 1 (one) in jeans while i wear a size 11! my mom says that i wear that size just becuz i am tall. but i think i am fat, and i have humongo hips. then when i wear shorts, i feel self-concious becuz i also think my legs are fat. my mom says it is just becuz i have been taking dance and basketball for almost 11 years and it is just muscle. but i think otherwise. HELP ME! i want to believe in myself but i just dont feel like i can.
2006-07-07 05:47:38 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
ok! check this out. First of all you have to stop worrying about what people think. When you get older, your going to realize that the people you once tried to impress really aren't much at all. You have to believe in yourself and only worry about what makes you happy. As for your "size" last i heard big or thick is in. A size 11 is very ideal and quite normal. You have to learn to speak your mind no matter what . Even if it does seem stupid in your head. You only live one life so enjoy and have fun!! Don't hold back cause you'll only live for regrets.
2006-07-07 06:05:43 · answer #1 · answered by thats me 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
OK first thing - it's been so long since I wore a size 11, that I'm really envious of that statement! All the tiny girls that wear single digit sizes are all well and good - but take Paris Hilton for example - my cat is smarter than she is!
I can understand that you are concerned about not saying the wrong thing - try finding something that you are both interested in. Boys love basketball - talk to them about a practice that you learned something cool... Talk about the stuff that you know about and like - just because he likes a band doesn't mean that you have to. If you don't - talk about why he does, maybe you will change your mind (or change his!)
Sounds like you are still a teenager - that had to have been the most painful time of my life. Things will get better - just be true to yourself and don't let the whole world bring you down. Find something that you like to do just for yourself and keep doing it - just for you, no one else's approval.
2006-07-07 12:58:41 · answer #2 · answered by tequila_girl98 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'll bet you look great! If you have been that physical you must have a nice figure! I was always atheletic and I weigh more due to muscle, but I look good! If you don't think you do no- one else will! Also, if you need a new you find you a stylist that can do a new you! Not the same one you've been going to! When you see someone with great hair ask them who did it and where can you find them. Also, get those legs shaved and get some skirts! let that athleticism pay off! Find a gay guy and let him dress you! Or nicely dressed female! Let me know how it helps
2006-07-07 12:56:53 · answer #3 · answered by Pepper 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My wife is fairly tall and wears a 12 and I think she looks great. Quit judging yourself. Beauty is still in the eye of the beholder. These girls that are running around that you can just about see through aren't very attractive to me. Cheer up and have a nice day!
2006-07-07 12:58:24 · answer #4 · answered by mike s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have been playing basketball and are in dance it is kinda hard to get fat. With the guy thing. Why don't you try like double dates or something. Were you can be with your friend and a guy. So you will act like yourself.
2006-07-07 13:22:54 · answer #5 · answered by luckystar53 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know how u feel and what works for me is just be ur self and remind ur self that i am bueatiful and god made me that way, don't look at ur outer bueaty look at ur in bueaty being life is what u want to make of it not what u want .
here is something that helps me.
life is like a rose bush it dyes every year but it always grows back in the same place and the roses are more bueatiful and bigger than before,but u are always be bueatiful in ur on ways not someone elses good luck sweat/ bueatiful.
2006-07-07 13:01:05 · answer #6 · answered by mact600 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys don't like you for who you want to be, they like you for who you are! Be yourself. You should start by giving yourself a hug every morning when you get up and every evening when you get ready to go to bed. It's not about what you do or don't look like on the outside. It's about what you feel like on the inside. The first thing you need to do is begin to like yourself. Once you begin to like yourself then you can learn to love your inter beauty! Do you know why most guys won't ask a beautiful woman out? Because they are intimidated themselves. They think she's so pretty she'll never say yes if I ask her. The one thing I always did, and maybe this sounds a little egotistical, but I made myself available to every opportunity. I would ask the most beautiful woman for a date I learned that most of them would say yes. Why because all men are afraid to ask them so they just don’t get asked as often as you would think. There is a guy out there that wants to ask but remember he’s just as timid as you are. It's very possible that guys are afraid to ask you is what I am trying to say. It's not necessarily because of your physical appearance, but maybe it's because of their on lack of self-confidence. If you want to meet someone in life sometimes you have to take a chance. You will never learn to dance until you've learned to take a chance! So you feel lack of self confidence when you are talking to a guy. Find your comfort zone, we all have one. What are your interest? Find out what his interests are. When you find a common interest begin to talk about it. Hint, usually most guys are interested in sports, not all but most. Anyway I think you’ll find the guy is just as uncomfortable as you are. Once you get past the introduction stage it just gets easier. If you can be yourself around your friends then you can be yourself around guys. When the right guy comes along you won’t have a problem with conversation it will come natural. The dating process is part of life and having fun. Go out and have fun.
2006-07-07 13:17:29 · answer #7 · answered by Kewl__Kat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The most perfect answer: Self Confidence
U have to get it ur self(i know it maybe hard) or help from someone i think everyone can help u(chat with someone or talk face to face to lose the bad parts of ur moral):-? you are so beautiful! believe this.there are a lot of books that can help u a lotttttt. Good luck
2006-07-07 12:57:51 · answer #8 · answered by Mahyar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are having some self esteem issues. Find someone professional to talk to and get in with a good peer network. You are young and life will get better if you try and stop focusing on your looks.
2006-07-07 12:52:05 · answer #9 · answered by draken 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1) Believe you are a nice person
2) Gain self confidence by being around people who will be honest with you.
3) Be happy with your bodyshape
Be happy and Good Luck.
2006-07-07 12:52:10 · answer #10 · answered by brogdenuk 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋