I discovered my roommate is a stripper by some Nancy Drew like work (wasn't hard) I tried to tell her I knew and I don't judge her for it, but I don't like being lied to. I am confused because is this my business or not?? I think it is since it's just plain safer if I know where she is and how to reach her, but I don't want to drag something she is obviously wanting to keep secret into the light.
2006-07-07 02:55:33 · 27 answers · asked by SnakEve 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
This is interesting, glad to know the answer isn't so easy. Y'all sound like the voices in my head. Incidentally I didn't spy so much as find the g string drying on the back porch.
2006-07-07 03:16:12 · update #1
as long as she pays her bills, its not your concern. she obviuosly does not want anyone to know, so dont humiliate her by confronting her, and since you obviously already know where she is in case of an emergency, there is no need.
2006-07-07 03:01:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 15⤊ 3⤋
Your best bet IS to confront her on it, but not directly. "Hey... I know you're a stripper..." is probably not the most tactful way of approaching things.
Instead, tell her that you want to get her number at work in case there are any problems, and offer her a piece of paper with YOUR contact information on it. If she gives it to you, call her a few days later... the cat will be out of the bag then.
She might, in fact, be up front with you when you ask for the information... and then the conversations will start, and the tensions will disappear.
2006-07-07 03:00:35 · answer #2 · answered by Village Idiot 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is actually none of your business where she is, as for how to reach her, ask for an emergency number she can be contacted at. Other than that, it is her business where she goes and what she does, she is obviously and adult and you are not her parent. If being lied to is bothering you so much move, I don't think she is going to like the fact that she is being spied on either and would love for you to leave.
2006-07-07 03:10:52 · answer #3 · answered by Brooke 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends...are you close friends or just roommates that live together for the simple fact that it's cheaper? As long as the bills are getting paid maybe you really shouldn't care, BUT, living together she should really be honest with you. Maybe she's embarrassed to tell you, maybe she thinks that you'll think less of her. Give her some time, maybe she'll come around and tell you on her own.
2006-07-07 03:03:29 · answer #4 · answered by makeitclap23 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she's paying the rent, whatever she does with her life doesn't concern you, unless you are best friends or something. You are roommates, not lovers, so just let her live her life the way she wants. If she wanted you to know what she was doing for a living she would of told you already.
2006-07-07 06:07:32 · answer #5 · answered by johanne 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she lied about it then it's probably something that she wants to keep secret. if it isn't really affecting you then don't make it an issue. If how you found out was simple then you might want to advise that while her secret is safe with you that she might want to be more careful. Be sure that you don't judge her just because of what her profession is. good luck
2006-07-07 03:46:18 · answer #6 · answered by JJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU SHOULD confront anything that relates to you,your well being and security... from the moment, she became ur roomate, who is the person ur sharing the same roof, bills, morals, ethics and rules to live by and so much intimacy....is your concern.
TOO BAD U FIND OUT WHAT SHE DO FOR LIVING NOW!!!that she's already ur roomate...
OFF COURSE U SHOULD,AND HAVE THE RIGHT TO... Confront her...
but because in this case u already find out about what she do for living after accepting her as a roomate,
AND U GUYS PROBABLY HAVE A CONTRACT SIGN 2GETHER or some kind of legal tied ups...I
ll be more concern on what are the outcomes on those, before confronting her...
WHAT are the results of confronting her now in regards of the billing situation?. Where are u standing legally?. In case u decided u wanna end this communion.
THIS AND other issues like ur own security, Ill be very concern about...she might not being legal in the country or on a pay roll....who knows how many other lies are behind this one...she might be a type of prostitute, and may be taking different men to the place u guys share...who are this guys...you have to understand that where she works is a place where she is exposed to lot of dangerous men...I've read many stories about strippers and how weirdos start stalking them, rapist, even serial killers...I mean anyone could be a target for this type of tragedies but why increase the probabilities by sharing the most intimate part of ur life, wich is your home ur shelter, with someone, who already lie about her JOB...not because she is ashamed of it....but because it is a DANGEROUS ONE...
IM NOT SAYING DANGEROUS AS A CONSTRUCTION OR MINE WORKER....the danger stops once the person leave the perimeters of the place they're working on...
But with the stripper DANGER could start exactly out of the perimeters they work on and that could mean where u guys
live...:(
IN MY OPPINION I find this to be a very delicate issue whith whom you are sharing your roof...
PLEASE whatever u do or decide to do
NEXT TIME u look for a roomate FIND OUT ABOUT in advanced...this is something serious, who u bring and share ur house with, is not only cause she is a strippe,r that put u in danger, but the fact that she lies and the consequences of her lifestyles is what could put ur life in danger....
Like with any other person, could be your own brother, let say u have one, iand u decide to live with him,if he deals with drugs, that could put u in danger...
So good luck to you...Let everyone learn from this...Is not about confronting is about find it out in adavanced who are we bringing home to live with us...
2006-07-07 03:46:04 · answer #7 · answered by know it all 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is the g string the only proof you have? if it is than that doesn't mean she's a stripper. plenty of people have g strings and their not!
but if she is and she doesn't want to tell you, then its really none of your business! what if you had a secret you didn't want others to know but they got involved anyway? how would you feel? just a thought!
2006-07-07 03:50:48 · answer #8 · answered by JR 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're her roommate, not her signficant other.
Yes, it's right for you to be concerned, and yes, it is normal to be offended she's lying to you.
But I think you cross the line in spying on her.
You have a simple question to answer for yourself - do you want to live with someone who will lie to you about very signficant, large areas of her life?
2006-07-07 03:00:47 · answer #9 · answered by Timothy W 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Really ??? You found a g-string out drying on the PORCH ? Geee, I have 2 daughters and they have g-strings hangin' of the clothes line every day ........ and they are not strippers ! Perhaps you are in love with your roomy, I don't mean to offend........ but it seems you may be .........or is it just envy ? :)
2006-07-07 03:44:35 · answer #10 · answered by tusitala 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Based on the last question you posed... I would say there is one answer: Get a new roommate! This one is causing you problems on every turn.
2006-07-07 02:59:32 · answer #11 · answered by daiunus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋