My friend is 20 years old and for reasons left unsaid, he has never had a job. Today, he got his first job, but instead of feeling proud of himself, he said he felt like a loser that he never had a job until now. I'm trying to tell him that he's not, but I do think it is a little odd. Do any of you think it is? Is he pathetic for not having a job until now? Please be nice about it.
2006-07-06 13:56:49 · 16 answers · asked by hpotter4ever2000 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Yes, he's going to college.
2006-07-06 14:04:33 · update #1
He doesn't suffer from depression; he's just spoiled rotten and a little insecure since his parents do everything for him.
2006-07-06 14:06:49 · update #2
No, he's not pathetic. Some men and women don't have jobs until they are graduated from college. I was pushed into my first job at 16 by my mother. She regretted making me get a job and never would let my siblings(I have four younger) work until they were out of school. The only regrets I have about working at that age...I missed out on a lot of school activities such as dances, track meets etc....because I had to work. I had NO social life.
Tell your friend to hold his head high and good luck in all his future endeavors in the workplace.
2006-07-06 14:04:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
NO!! In the scheme of things 20s really young... he's only out of school a few years, has he been studying? i know many people (including myself) who have studied till mid 20's (though I did have little jobs along the way). Life is not all about work and capital - especially not at his age. I'd be worried if he'd never kissed a girl/boy, didn't have any friends or had never partied - certainly not if he didn't have a job. Ease up and go get drunk with him tonight in celebration! It's just another life experience.
2006-07-06 21:03:56 · answer #2 · answered by soulgirl76 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think he's pathetic. Not everyone needs to have a job when they're young. My first job wasn't until I was 18 or 19 & that was only because my parents stopped helping me so much. He should just feel lucky that he wasn't like some of my friends who got jobs at 15.
2006-07-06 21:01:02 · answer #3 · answered by jamieinreno 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No offense, but yes, I do think it's pathetic and disgraceful to be 20 years old and never have held a job. However, having said that, I don't think your friend should be down on himself now. He's moving forward and has sought out gainful employment. He should be encouraged to look ahead and not beat himself up over past poor judgment. We all make mistakes. Fortunately, he's correcting his now, rather than waiting even longer.
2006-07-06 21:00:25 · answer #4 · answered by postalmaria 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's feeling pathetic because he realizes how easy it is to get and have a job and wasted so many years? Maybe he's ashamed of the fact that he felt incapable of being self-sufficient for so long, and now that he IS he sees how silly it was?
Do *I* think it's pathetic? No, actually, I think it's getting to be pretty normal. The so-called outside world of grown-ups can be scary to someone who has avoided taking responsibility. It's far easier to put that last part of growning up off.
2006-07-06 21:02:55 · answer #5 · answered by Happy Guesser 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well either pathetic or he has had no one to drive him to reasoning to get one .. perhaps he was a spoiled guy and i know someone who was 20 before he had his 1st job called the army otherwise he would never have gotten hired sad.. i had one at 14 some ppl have it made some want to make their own and have parents who say ya want it work for it like we did .. in this day and age you have to have experience or the job situation will eat u up as it is way to competetive to get a job in certain towns.
2006-07-06 21:02:38 · answer #6 · answered by gypsygirl731 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your friend sounds like he might suffer from depression. It's really important that you try and get him some help.
Here are some common symptoms of depression:
SYMPTOMS OF DEPRESSION AND MANIA
Not everyone who is depressed or manic experiences every symptom. Some people experience a few symptoms, some many. Severity of symptoms varies with individuals and also varies over time.
Depression
Persistent sad, anxious, or "empty" mood
Feelings of hopelessness, pessimism
Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, helplessness
Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies and activities that were once enjoyed, including sex
Decreased energy, fatigue, being "slowed down"
Difficulty concentrating, remembering, making decisions
Insomnia, early-morning awakening, or oversleeping
Appetite and/or weight loss or overeating and weight gain
Thoughts of death or suicide; suicide attempts
Restlessness, irritability
Persistent physical symptoms that do not respond to treatment, such as headaches, digestive disorders, and chronic pain
2006-07-06 21:01:39 · answer #7 · answered by wanderklutz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's pathetic at all. Having a job doesn't make you more or less important, it's just a way of earning money.
Hopefully he'll like his new job and feel better after his first day.
2006-07-06 21:03:36 · answer #8 · answered by . 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are plenty of people older than 20 who are just now getting there first job. Education takes a lot longer in the developed world than it ever did before, so it's no surprize people wait longer to get a job.
2006-07-06 21:01:07 · answer #9 · answered by MikeD 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't think it is odd to have a first job at age 20. The important thing is that he did get a job.
2006-07-06 21:00:29 · answer #10 · answered by WC 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋