We just got married in June, and I'm already very unhappy. My husband is very inattentive and very selfish. I don't want to get a divorce but I don't think we can work out. I know it sounds dumb, but it's one of those situtations where I don't know what's worse.
2006-07-06 11:03:07 · 18 answers · asked by halocraze86 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I've known him for 3 years.
2006-07-06 11:13:53 · update #1
It's not fair to either one of you. If you ain't happy then the odds are he's not either. So, if he won't talk about some solutions with you, and won't work with you to make this work, then it's time to move on. I don't like divorce, a lot of people use it as a quick fix for problems, but there is times when it's the only choice. Be happy, and if he's not willing to make those extra steps, then I think that for you it's time to move on. Find that someone who brings a smile to your lips just thinking about them. praying for you!
2006-07-06 11:17:41 · answer #1 · answered by totallylost 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Wow, I'm glad I'm not the only one in this situation. I'm happy in my marriage, but I know I could be happier...I just got married a little while ago too, but right now it's the adjustment period. You hear a lot of people say that the first year is tough...because it is. You learn all of their habits, and the way they live etc, and that can be hard in itself at times. It takes time to get used to. It's been hard for me, but I know things are getting better as we adjust. Just hang in there and make sure you talk to your spouse about these things because I bet you they may be feeling the same thing...if it's not a lot...then it's at least a little. Just give it some time and I bet things will work out. It's like having a roommate that you have to get used to. Good luck :).
2006-07-06 18:23:43 · answer #2 · answered by KJGabe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, yes its wrong, second, if your not happy, then leave him to get happy, our lives are too short to not be happy, also, if you dont think it'll work then it wont, and, its not dumb, the worst thing you can do is stay in the marriage.
If you decide to divorce, you have to get rid of anything that will remind you of him, and you cant talk to him for atleast 6 months.. also dont rush out into the dating scene either, just play it slow, let things pan out, and you'll find someone better, there are so many people, your perfect one is out there waiting for you to get over this slob.
2006-07-06 18:09:38 · answer #3 · answered by kakez 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen, the beginning of marriage is a very hard time for any couple. You are just learning how the other person lives their lifes and sometimes that may cause problems. What I would do, is sit down and talk to him about what is bothering you. Communitcation is key to a good marriage. That is what I would do, and then go from there.
2006-07-06 18:08:01 · answer #4 · answered by Katie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i got married a year ago and let me tell u the first month was hell for me we always where arguing and fighting we didnt get along but then it all starts geting better u guys are just geting to noe each other its hard because u didnt noe that person like that but believe me it gets better dont give up just try to work things out and have lots of comunication that is the key to a relationship and tell him how u feel dont divoce him wait a little bit and if u feel like u cant any longer then decide another thing u can try is getting marrige counceling.
2006-07-06 18:14:05 · answer #5 · answered by lazybutt916 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the first year is the hardest! didnt you date long enough? read "men are from mars, women are from venus" it will really help you a lot! remember that if you put your partner on a pedestal, they will only fall. no matter how much you love eachother, you are still both human beings. marrying someone is not saying that youre gonna have a great life together. its saying that you know things are gonna be hard, but you will each be there for eachother and not cop out. marrying someone is pretty much just choosing someone to be a witness to your life. the good and bad. read that book
2006-07-06 18:14:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please go buy the book called Love & Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. We got it at a christian book store. It is excellent!! You both have to be willing to work at it though!! Dont give up we live in a world where everyone just wants the easy way out. Not many fight to save their marriages anymore. Pray for God to restore your marriage. Even the worst of marriages can make it.
2006-07-06 18:25:37 · answer #7 · answered by MARSHA S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it does suck and I can understand how u feel but I have realized that that is the biggest part of being married that ur feelings don't really matter n u have to continue to try and put him first n also seek marriage couseling. Hopefully he will get his act together soon.
Also pray.
2006-07-06 18:09:56 · answer #8 · answered by leenabootie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is wrong to stay in an unhappy marriage. You deserve to be happy in your life. God bless.
2006-07-06 18:09:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm, starting over OR staying married forever and being unhappy, having kids, feeling stuck, hmmmmmmmm......
2006-07-06 18:08:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋