newly divorced, paying child support, should this pay for scout camp & spending $ & such or am I obligated to?

Answer 1

it your kid do you love them are they Worth can you afford it

Answer 2

Many people get the misconception that once you're paying child support, that takes care of ALL of the child's expenses. Not true; your last child support payment was not increased for this extra-curricular activity.

Think of it this way, if you were still married, how would scout camp have been paid? Would you have covered the entire expense or would you have just payed it from the gross of both incomes? You also need to consider what added expenses have been incurred since the divorce, such as separate living expenses, etc. (That is also included in child support as your child needs a place to live, you get the drift).

Finally, what would a good parent do? Should the child suffer because the parents can't come to a mutual understanding? I am by no means suggesting being a pushover and shelling out money for everything that comes up, but just use your better judgement. This is not about your ex but about your child; if your child really wants to go to scout camp, and it is something you can afford, then by all means make the child happy. This has probably been a hard time for him/her as it has been for the two of you.

Answer 3

I know that child support eliminated a big chunk of your discretionary spending...but..

Be a hero to yourself and either pay for or split the cost of camp with your ex if possible. If you want your child to have an allowance, give it; but don't throw up the child support everytime your child wants or needs something from you.

I'm talking about your child, not your ex. Your ex doesn't get to decide what you can and cannot afford, you do. Your child will adjust to your income as a single parent. Just do the best you can by your child...that's all that's required.

As someone who heard over and over again that their father wasn't paying for this or that because he already paid child support, I know how hurtful this honest, but very cold statement can be to the child. You might as well say..."you're a burden I no longer want or need." You divorced your ex, not your child (hopefully).

If you can't afford it, just say so.

Remember, it's a matter of what kind of a father you are, not the perks you provide.

Answer 4

Pay for what your child needs. I know paying child support seems like a huge chunk of change out of your pocket, especially when you and your ex have to now maintain two separate residences, but avoid the battles over money. If you don't trust your ex to use the money correctly on some of those "extras", like scouts and such, make the effort to be involved in those activities yourself. If he wants to be a scout, you take him, you be involved, don't just give over the money for those extras and be done with it. Provide but stay involved.

Answer 5

Your obligation is to your kids. Do they need it? Can you provide it? If you were still married to their mother would this even be an issue?

I ask because of the tone of your question it would appear that you are no longer married to their mother, your paying your child support and you don't feel "obligated" to spend any more than that on your children....is that right?

It breaks my heart when people boil everything down to the $$ and forget that the way they act, the things they say, and how their children feel lasts FOREVER.

You might or might not have any further legal obligation...but what is your moral and ethical obligation to your children?

In my book, it's going to the ends of the earth for whatever they need.

Answer 6

When special events come up like camp, the parents should split the costs. The child support you pay is for the day to day expenses. If your child is old enough, maybe a few chores for each parent could help earn the money instead of it being handed out.

Answer 7

Yes, I feel anything over normal everyday expenses, which child support should cover, the non custodial parent souch cover half.

However, I offer this suggestion about Scout camp. Whether it boy or Girl Scouts, there is usually financial aid available if asked for.

Answer 8

Knowing how expensive Scout Camp is, you might want to help out. It was a life changing experience for my son, and I would assume that you would like for your son to have every advantage in life that he can. If you can do it, I think you should--not for your spouse, but for your child. The spending money thing--support should cover.

Answer 9

In my opinion, what you pay for child support (assuming it's a decent amount) should go towards whatever the kid needs. If you CHOOSE to pay for scout camp, etc, that's up to you....

Answer 10

If you love your kid, pay for scout camp, you'll make his day! And they will never forget it. I know I worry about were my support goes, but I can't do anything about it as long as the kids are being taken care of and they have the things they need. It stinks buddy.

Answer 11

Child support should cover the costs of basic month to month living for your child. You may need to spend extra money for all those extra-curricular activities. Spending money though should come out of the child support money.