HE IS MARRIED BUT SEPARATED> HE SAYS THAT HE NEEDS TO SELL THE HOUSE AND THEN FILE FOR DIVORCE> ITS BEEN SIX MONTHS SINCE HE LEFT HIS WIFE AND HE KEEPS TELLING ME THAT HE NEEDS TO GET THE HOUSE READY TO SELL AND HE IS GOING THROUGH A LOT OF STRESS RIGHT NOW> SOMETIMES I DONT FEEL COMFORTABLE BRINGING UP THE SUBJECT BECAUSE I AM AFRAID HE WILL FEEL OVERWHELMED WITH EVRYTHING AND WANT ME TO LEAVE HIM ALONE> WHAT SHOULD I DO> HE SAYS THAT HE LOVES ME A LOT AND WANTS A FUTURE WITH ME> I LOVE HIM TOO> WHAT SHOULD I DO
2006-07-06 10:10:10 · 22 answers · asked by Alexa 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Dump him. He's not worth waiting and fighting for.
2006-07-06 10:13:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he really wants to be with you he will just file. Who cares if the house is ready or not. It doesn't have to be perfect to sell it. As you said it has been six months, if he really wanted to get things together he would be working on getting it done, not saying he needs to.
It seems he doesn't want to file for divorce or sell the house because he still is not completely resigned to the fact his marriage is over and that is his tie to the past. He may really care for you, but it seems not enough to put your feelings and future first if he is dragging his feet getting that divorce. It takes six months for a divorce to go through, anyways so the longer he waits, the longer you will have to wait to plan a future with him.
2006-07-06 10:25:23 · answer #2 · answered by melissa_anne_maison 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Going through a separation IS stressful. I don't see that you can give him an option to get a divorce first then be with you. You already made the decision to be with a married man. It would be hypocritical of you otherwise. You can't MAKE him file for a divorce. You either support him through this or you leave.
2006-07-06 10:16:07 · answer #3 · answered by cindyspiderucla 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, there is no way you can "make" anyone do anything they do not want to do.
Second, he is already committed. You should ask yourself what is the real reason you would set yourself up to be hurt. Obviously, he is not available and unattainable. Why did you initially continue your relationship once you found out he was married? You can only answer this question.
If he really wants to be with you there is NOTHING that would stop him from being with you. He is keeping you at arms length. Wake up girl!
Finally, I would suggest reading "He's Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys". This book is the straight dope. It is brutally honest.
2006-07-06 10:23:50 · answer #4 · answered by bombshellicon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friend lived with her boyfriend for 2 years before he'd sell the house and divorce his wife. First of all this is what you get for being involved with a man that is not divorced so you need to either dump him if you can't handle it or be very patient, you knew this before you fell for him so just deal with it or dump him, you can't make him do anything.
2006-07-06 10:14:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know what dear im married and i had problems with my husband we had been separated for over six months and were going to sell the house, it was his decision not mine, he procastinated on gettin a divorce, and putting the house for sale, .
if your boyfriend really wanted to do this he would have already don it because it took him this long , his not sure what he wants, your just there to suport his hard times, but getting in one relationship before ending the other is not good for the third party .the one who will end up hurt will be you hes using you because your giving him what his wife doesnt, if things got better between her and he, he will kick you to the curb, and if they didnt, hell keep you until he find someone he really wants to be with, not some one who is just there for him, its sad but some men are like that, hes confused and hes only with you because hes lonely.
2006-07-06 10:48:48 · answer #6 · answered by jackiegradilla 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him time!!! If with in 2 month he still as not taken care of that, offer to help him start the processes, some men just need some help and don't know where and how to start the paper work. Provide him with all the phone numbers and address where he can go to get started. Be there form him!
2006-07-06 10:21:58 · answer #7 · answered by Sheny 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, first you should stop using all caps! Seriously, you knew he wasn't completely free when you decided to be with him so you need to be patient. The more you push, the more you stress him out, the harder it is for him to get his head and life straight. Be supportive, but not pushy. That doesn't mean letting this situation go on forever, but try giving him six more months.
2006-07-06 10:24:27 · answer #8 · answered by alan a 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you should have never gotten involved with a married man! My advice is to kick him to the curb! If he's not willing to commit to you and get the divorce, drop him. If he loves you like he says he does, he'll get the divorce and come back to you.
2006-07-06 10:27:20 · answer #9 · answered by just me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop pushing the issue. Give it 6 more months, if he has not taken care of getting divorced tell him when he finally gets it together to give you a call.
2006-07-06 10:14:29 · answer #10 · answered by Simply Lovely 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make him get a divorce ha ha thats good the man needs time he and his wife may get back together him telling you he love you in six months that rebound love hes confuse
2006-07-06 10:18:25 · answer #11 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋