My husband is into video games, so much till we do not spend quality time together. I have talked to him about this but he still plays his games. I know he loves me. I have met an attractive guy and he comes to my job daily. I don’t know what to do? I am feeling really lonely, this guy tells me how attractive I am and he says all the right things that my husband does not. In fact Guys always come on to me, but my husband treats me like I don’t exist sometimes. I love him but I don’t understand why I want to see this other guy.
2006-07-06 09:52:52 · 26 answers · asked by PYT 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't do it! It's temptation with serious reprocussions. Your husband is about to get a rude awakening. You want his attention? Have an adulterous affair, if your marriage is worth losing. If you love your husband, like you say you do, then fix yourself up, while he's around. He'll probably wonder what you're up to. Go out with girlfriends, just make sure he sees you getting ready. Catch him, while he's getting ready & not on the video games. Buy him a new video game & give it to him on your way out the door. Just remember, stay loyal & faithful to him cuz he doesn't know what he's doing. You're gonna have to push some uncomfortable buttons that will raise an eyebrow, or get his atttention somehow. After all, are your buttons, not being pushed already? Please don't give in to any of these guys. If your husband changes for the better, then you're still stuck with these guys you led on & then it will come back to haunt you at the most inopportune time. Most importantly, be in prayer about it. I've been married twice & I wished I had payed better attention to my wives, in both my marriages. Hope things work out for you. Oh yeah, if you do buy him a video game, buy one that says how you feel, or just get him a boring one.
2006-07-06 10:05:30 · answer #1 · answered by chicanomedic 1 · 19⤊ 3⤋
Don't proceed any further with that situation... Trust me... it's a set up for failure. You are married and prior to marrying him you must have known your husband had this issue.. So you made a choice.. For better or worse. If this is the worst then you can be thankful because it could be worse. Not to minimize the situation, but conversation is needed. Wait for a convenient time. Perhaps when you're out on a date. Don't have an accusing tone in your voice and try not to do the blame thing... just as sweetly as you can let him know that you are hurt that he's cheating on you... then tell him you feel that he is cheating on you with the computer. It is taking most or all of his attention away from you. Let him know you love him deeply, however, you are in a world of pain because you need his attention, love and affection and would like to spend more time with him. First find out if he's dealing with any pressures (ie. financial, health, job, stress, other family issues etc.) This video thing is a distraction and pehaps a form of excape because he's stressed.
Lastly... seek out marriage counseling. Even if he doesn't want to go you should. Pray before speaking to him. But always remember... There is always someone or something out there ready and waiting to break up a union that God has blessed and sanctioned. Don't let it happen. Keep this person away from your marriage. You made a covenant with God about your husband to Love and honor... in good times and bad. Don't bail now... ask for assistance.
All the best!
2006-07-06 10:23:30 · answer #2 · answered by 247 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are a women with respect for your self I would not go digging for another man because they wont look at you as a trust worthy person. I understand that he is very stupid in a way but sweet heart he is still your husband. I suggest you talk to him and let him know that you will leave him if he doesn't change his act. If things are still the same then I suggest you pack your bags and stay over at a friends to scare him a bit also. If all else fails pack your bags and get going. The problem may be you both dont find the attraction that you did when you first got married. maybe turning things up a bit in the bedroom should do the trick but if not theres a big problem. All I want you to know is that the vows that you both made to each other should be thought of because those things are real not a joke. Dont leave because another man is getting to you while you have another one at home who isn't good. Leave because its coming from your heart not your head.
2006-07-06 10:10:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your are feeling neglected and this guys are making you feel alive. Its normal. If you really love your husband, contain your feeling, they only mean trouble and hurt in the future. What you need to do is try all you can to make your husband interested in you again. Take the initiative and surprise him with a romantic night during the week. Keep on trying even if he shows no interest. We cant leave it up to guy all the time to be the romantics in the relationship. And if all turns out OK. You will forget those other guys,l you will have time only to think of your husband.
Good Luck
2006-07-06 10:08:14 · answer #4 · answered by Sheny 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off you don't have to cheat. I've never agreed with that anyway. They made a song with the lyrics: "Should I stay or should I go" those are your two choices if you are going to stay then stay and let him know that you have considered cheating on you due to the lack of attention he gives you and also bring up the fact that he is negecting his dutys as your husband by not having sex with you. You don't have to cheat just end the relationship. Nobody has to cheat people just do. Men cheat and women cheat. I can't put down on the people who do cheat cause I've done it before and it isn't worth it. Just end things with your husband or stay in it. If you cheat on him depending on the kind of man he is you might not live to tell about it. Sit him down and explain to him that his attitude and how he is showing you what seems to be a great part based on love a lack there of is going to cause you to leave him. If his attituide does not change then make up your mind. A lot of men try to have the best of both worlds. So don't do that. Just pick one and stick with it don't try to change anything after you have made your decision and don't think what if or how about...don't think any of those things and avoid regret because if you don't it will destroy whatever decision youo make.
2016-03-27 06:54:12 · answer #5 · answered by Regenna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please do not do anything you will regret later. Tell your husband how you feel. Try to get some marital counseling, or go see a counselor (psychologist) your self if he won't go with you. I would recommend a good Christian one.
The reason most women have affairs is for emotional closeness. Her husband does not give her the time and attention she needs so she seeks it in the arms of another man.
Your husband is probably struggling with an addiction to video games. Ask him to get help and just let him know you are not happy ask him if playing video games is Worth losing you over.
I was dating a guy once who was addicted to video games (he went as far as to tell me he was an active person because he played active video games.) He chose them over me. I am glad I found out where I rated in his eyes before we got married.
2006-07-06 10:02:42 · answer #6 · answered by AlwaysRight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your husband everything you said here. It might make him angry at first and he'll get defensive...but I can almost promise it will sink in. Maybe he doesnt' understand the severity of the situation and that would be a good way to let him know. If he still doesn't care, I'd say go for the guy that pays attention to you. But not til you've run out of other options.
2006-07-06 09:59:05 · answer #7 · answered by kiss me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your attracted to him because your husband is not giving it to you but that does not mean try anything with this guy try to join in on the video games or find a game you and him will both like and spend some quality time together he will like this and it will get his attention on you and stay away from this other guy he would not care about what happens to you and your marriage he only cares about one thing remember he does not have anything to lose and you do
2006-07-06 11:25:56 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Flirtation is always flattering. Do you really want to be interested in a guy that has no respect for a married woman? Doesn't have to buy the cow if he's gonna get the milk for free with a little smooth-talkin'. Take yourself to a counselor, get some good third party advice and go from there before you REALLY screw up your marriage. And if doesn't work out, divorce him, and tell the guy you're COMPLETELY available now (we'll see what happens to his flirtation then!). ;)
2006-07-06 09:58:52 · answer #9 · answered by cindyspiderucla 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you are married! I am hoping you are not telling this other guy about your husband not taking care of you because it is none of his business. He will see that you are down and will tell you everything you want to hear. Try to get interested in video games if that is what you husband spends all of his time with.
Remember your vows...for better, for worse.
2006-07-06 09:57:08 · answer #10 · answered by sweetnessmo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋