2006-07-06 09:11:10 · 20 answers · asked by chemile 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Is she retarded? Or just a masochist?
2006-07-06 09:14:18 · answer #1 · answered by Grendle 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women in violent and abusive relationships often feel a few things:
1)that their man is really sorry after wards and that they can work it out
2)that they deserve it somehow for not being good enough for the partner
3)that they don't have a place to go
Tell your stepdaughter that if she ever wants to leave this man, she is welcome at your home. Keep in contact with her, even if she doesn't contact you, because abusive partners often try to isolate their victims from family and friends. Tell your stepdaughter you care about her and want her to be OK, and that you are always available to talk. Give her information about battered women's centers in your area. In some states, if people witness domestic violence firsthand, the state will press charges against the abuser even if the victim does not want to. If you live in one of these states and you have witnessed violence against your stepdaughter, call the police, and try to document (write down dates and approximate times and any wounds and take pictures if you can) any incidents whether you have witnessed them or not.
Then you wait, and hope that she comes home to you someday before it's too late.
2006-07-06 09:21:25 · answer #2 · answered by cay_damay 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There r many reasons it could be. I think I need a little more information...
If you two do not have a good relationship, and you forbid her to be with him she may be rebelling against you.
If she is young, she may believe it's love and that he will change if she can just stick it out, he probably tells her it will never happen again, and she believes him.
If she is older and has been with him for a long time, her self- esteem is probably zero and she probably feels no one will love her and he is the best she can do.
One thing to pray for is she does not get pregnant.
Another reason she may be doing this is because she grew up in a violent home, and she thinks it's ok to be like that.
Like I said, it may be a number of reasons, whatever the reason may be, it's not ok, and she needs to get out of there no matter what the cost. If she continues to live like that, her spirit will be broken, if it hasn't already, and that is something very hard to get back.
2006-07-06 09:21:11 · answer #3 · answered by lil am_27 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why does the stepmother allow it ?
Your stepdaughter cannot see the abuse she lives with .
Victims of abuse inevitably come to depend on their abuser entirely , ie they dont ask themselves what they should do today , they ask themselves what HE would want them to do today .
Just as inevitably she is convinced that she could never find anyone better (he tells her every day and he's always right or she gets a beating!) .
Are you willing to sacrifice your relationship with her to give her a better chance at life ?
If so contact an abuse helpline for advise but note that without the abused consent there is little anyone can do . Alternatively find a man opposed to such abuse (there are plenty) and ask his advise . men don't worry about things they fix them .
P.S Only when her life has improved will she see that you were looking out for her and then she will be grateful .
Good Luck .
2006-07-12 23:20:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with many of the other answerers. This is a serious self esteem problem, and it will only spiral downward....it is a vicious cycle. My sister was in the same situation, and she didn't wise up until her boyfriend chased her in his car one night and tried to run her off the road. Thank God that scared her enough to get rid of him, but unfortunately, some women would have still taken him back. You should probably seek some family counseling, even if SHE won't go, some concerned family members could go and get some advice about how to deal with it. God Bless You....I know this is a terrible thing for the family, who just has to sit by and watch helplessly.
2006-07-06 09:20:23 · answer #5 · answered by Schleppy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, How is she been treated at home, how old is she, how long have they been together. Do you give her family support even though she is making a bad decision. Comes down to she will do what she wants to do. Being there for her always will help her emotionally. She may have more problems than you know and getting her to communicate with you will help out greatly. Just keep on tryin to show her that there are better options and people out there.
2006-07-06 09:17:18 · answer #6 · answered by juzchiln 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because violent guys can always find a girl with no self esteem. Watch a couple of episodes of Cops and you will see this happen again and again.
2006-07-06 09:14:31 · answer #7 · answered by davidmi711 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most likely, low self-esteem. That seems to be the case with most women living in violent relationships.
2006-07-06 09:14:28 · answer #8 · answered by Gatorz22 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She most likely thinks that she's "In love." He's probably given her something that no other boy has and usually they're taken in by that. Find a hot nice guy for her!! ASAP. Kthanks.
2006-07-06 09:14:35 · answer #9 · answered by toemas05 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps low self esteem, or she is afraid to leave. Offer to help and if she refuses and there are not children in the house, leave her be.
2006-07-06 09:17:24 · answer #10 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well basically, it is my belief that women have a desire to help people, and she is (most likely subconsciously) attempting to make him better, to make him more of a human and to teach him what is right and wrong. if she learns that he cannot be fixed, no matter how good she is to him, then she will be more apt to leaving him
2006-07-06 09:25:21 · answer #11 · answered by seafaerie321 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋