My 19 year old son is way out of control with drinking, drugs?

Question

just plain out of control, he lives with me and making everyone miserable including himself, anyone else with a similar problem that had a solution to it, what did you do? My heart is aching. Serious answers only please

Answer 1

As much as this will hurt, you need to kick him out and cut him off financially. It's tough to do, but it must be done.

Answer 2

let me give you some good advise. if your son falls down, or gets in a car accent,or get in a fight, and the cops find achole in his blood on his breath or found out he was drinking and he live with you you will get in trouble probably loose your job, because he is underage. then on top of that there going to want to know why you buy him beer. if he has beer bottles or bear cans in his room. open container and severing achole to a minnor. plus the drugs.first talk with him . ask him who buys him the beer and the drugs. if that didnt work start takeing his tv out his room phone just a bed and his clothes. help him find a job or go to a colleage. ask him what he wants in life join the airforce for two years. if he still doesnt know give him a choice you either go to a trade school,
colleage, miltary. or find a job you have until september06 or you will be out in the streets. and support your own self. pay for eveything.

Answer 3

Let me just say this, when I was younger I was hellish bad into coke and sex and witchcraft etc. and the way my mom tried to 'handle' me was to have me committed. Let me tell you that did not help. It only made it worse. Finally I met Jesus (because I had an aunt that truly did care) She took me in and did not give me ultimatims. She showed me unconditional love and she put up with a lot but eventually I came around and now I have a wonderful life and am drug free. It took someone who showed me love no matter how horrible I was.

Answer 4

Well you need to force him in to rehab, quit paying for his expenses and his habit. Throw him out of the house, change all the locks on the door and keep them locked. You have to show some tough love. Drug and Alcohol addiction is not an easy thing to deal with. Let him face the consequences of his own actions, and stop protecting him.

Answer 5

If your son is drinking and doing drugs then I think you should try to get him in a hospital to help him or a therapist or someone to talk to or maybe you can talk to him and let him know what he's doing to the family and to himself and maybe he'll think about things, anyway whatever you want to do make sure it's what you really want

Answer 6

If he won't go to rehab and especially if you have younger kids at home, you should ask him to leave. No one should be subjected to this when the person won't do anything to help themselves. Let him hit bottom on his own. He won't be dragging anyone down with him and it may be the only way he'll decide to climb back out.

Don't be an enabler by providing him with the atmosphere to continue down that path.

Answer 7

You need to go to Alanon for yourself. You also need to set strict rules for him and if breaks them........he leaves the house...immediately......no questions asked! Don't make his problem your problem. He is an "adult" as defined by law. You are not going to change him so don't even waste your energy. You can only control your own way of how you are going to handle this situation. Oh, yeah.....you may try going to a therapist.....they are wonderful in helping you direct yourself to solutions to your problems.

Answer 8

Sit him down a talk to him about rehab and if he disagree with that then tell him it`s time for him to grow up and move out..You raise him to be a man not a coward and it might hurt you for saying that but deep down he will hurt you more if you don`t help him..I just hope he would go to rehab and get off all that stuff and if he doesn`t then you need to stand up and get him out of there or your life will be ruint with him there..Good luck..

Answer 9

I've never been in that situation but maybe some counseling with him or the family. What have you got to lose. There are counseloes and groups that specialize in that type of behavior. I wish you and your son the best of luck.

Answer 10

I don't know much about this but my daughter is dating someone that used to do things like this. I strongly do not approve of them being together but they love each other and he has stopped doing a lot of things because we have talked to him. Me and my daughter talk a lot about it and she keeps him in line. Does your son have a girlfriend? If he does then you should try to talk to her about helping him stop doing these things that could hurt him even kill him. If he doesn't have a girlfrined then talk to him and tell him he needs to find someone and help him the best you can. When he finds someone talk to her. Make sure she cares enough about him to help your son.

Answer 11

visit the local police and talk to any drug or gang task force officers. they know what to do. they will talk with him. if he doesn't listen it will be best that he know them in advance because chances are he will be dealing with them down the road and you can rest assured that if they know him and his family they may show a little more compassion when dealing with him. it is very important to have the problem identified and addressed by someone of authority!