What emotional situations does a pregnant teen experience?

Answer 1

(Quoted)
Behind the Scenes of a Teen Pregnancy

by Focus on the Family

Before considering how you might respond to the news that your unmarried teenager is pregnant, take a brief tour of the emotions and thought processes that are likely to be swirling through her mind and heart.

Your daughter's experience

Fear is an overriding emotion in nearly every teen pregnancy. "I can't tell my parents. They'll kill me!" "How can I finish school when I'm pregnant?" "My boyfriend will take off if I don't have an abortion." The adolescent with a crisis pregnancy probably sees nothing but loss on the horizon — loss of love, time, education and physical health. Fear of one or more of these losses propels most of her other responses. Remember that the average age difference between the father of the baby and the teenage mother is 6.4 years.
Denial is common, especially during the early weeks of pregnancy when the only indication might be one or more missed periods, a little fatigue, possibly some nausea or even a positive pregnancy test. The longing for things to be "the way they were" may delay acknowledging the problem and seeking appropriate help for weeks or even months.
Ambivalence about being pregnant may cause fluctuating emotions. One day the only solution may appear to be an abortion, while the next the prospect of a cuddly baby may seem appealing. Time spent with a friend's crying newborn may jolt the emotions in yet another direction. Indecision and apparent lack of direction in such an overwhelming situation are common.
Guilt. When a pregnancy results from the violation of moral values held since childhood, an adolescent will usually feel ashamed and worthless. Her growing abdomen becomes a constant reminder of her failure. This is a time when you can come alongside your child and cement a lasting relationship with her.
Pressure to have an abortion. This may come from several directions. A teenager may be weighing what appears to be a dismal future of hardship and remorse against a quick and relatively inexpensive procedure. "No one needs to know, and I can get on with my life." A boyfriend (who may be dealing with his own fear and guilt, along with concerns about future financial responsibilities) may exert considerable pressure to abort, even offering to pay the bill. He may also threaten to bail out of the relationship if the pregnancy continues. Some parents, worried about their daughter's future or perhaps their own reputation in the community (or even the prospect of being responsible for the actual child-rearing), may also find abortion attractive.
The "cuddly doll" mentality. Some unmarried teenage girls see their pregnancy unrealistically as an escape from a difficult and unpleasant home situation. They may envision a baby as a snuggly companion who will require roughly the same amount of care as a new puppy, not realizing the amount of energy a newborn will take from her without giving much in return (especially during the first few weeks). Teens with this mindset need to adjust their expectations of child-rearing — not to drive them to abort, but to help them make more appropriate plans. If adoption is not chosen as a solution, some careful groundwork should be laid to prevent serious disappointment and even the mother's abuse of the baby.
Your experience as parent(s)

If a pregnancy is an upheaval for a teenager, it is also no picnic for her parents. Discovering that your adolescent daughter is pregnant is a trial like few others, and reactions — fear for her future, denial, guilt — may parallel hers with equal intensity. Parents are likely to feel anger in a number of directions — anger toward their daughter for being careless, not taking their advice, not using good judgment and disobeying them and God. They may be angry with the boy (or man) involved, who has violated their trust and their daughter's well-being. They may be angry with themselves for any number of reasons: They were too narrow or too permissive, too busy or too tired to tune into their daughter's world for the past several months — and now look what has happened.

Anger is such a classic parental response that the daughter may try to keep her pregnancy a secret. In fact, many states allow minors to obtain abortions without parental consent or knowledge, based on the presumption that the mother or father will be so disruptive and unreasonable that the teenage daughter can better deal with her pregnancy without them.

Your most difficult (and character-building) task is to show how much you really love your daughter, even though you don't approve of what she has done. The classical Chinese symbol for the word crisis has special meaning in this situation. It consists of two symbols: one representing danger, the other, opportunity. The danger is that your response to the pregnancy may open wounds in your family that will take years to heal, if they ever do. Your opportunity is rising to the occasion in such a way as to earn your daughter's lifelong respect and gratitude.

Your mission is to remain calm when panic is in the air and to be more concerned about her embarrassment than your own, which may be enormous. It is to be comforting, when you feel like saying, "I told you so!" It is to help organize everyone's conflicting impulses into a thoughtful plan in which the family can work as a team. It is to guide the baby's father into responsible participation if he is willing, when you would just as soon enlist him in the Marines. Most of all, it is to channel your intense feelings into productive outlets — through planning, prayer, vigorous exercise and blowing off steam to a tolerant friend rather than at your child.

Your daughter will need help, and lots of it, but not a total rescue. She must make a fast transition to adulthood, a state about which you know a great deal more than she does. You must resist the temptation to throw her out or keep her stuck in childish irresponsibility by making all of her decisions. She needs to face all the tough decisions and demands of pregnancy but with you at her side as a confident ally.

You may have one very critical decision of your own to make. What role do you intend to take in the child's upbringing? If the mother-to-be is very young, you may see another parenting job on the horizon and perhaps resent the idea. Or you may be excited about having the nest occupied for several more years. Your feelings on this issue need to be sorted out, and your course of action planned accordingly.

In the midst of your family's deliberations, be sure ample consideration is given to adoption. A pregnant teenager may be torn by the thought that "if I had the baby, I couldn't handle giving her away." But adoption can provide a livable solution for all parties involved. The baby is raised by a couple who intensely desire to be parents, and the birth mother can pick up and move on to complete her education and career goals, postponing her own parenting until she is ready.

You will also need to address the question of abortion. Many voices will be calling your daughter to the abortion clinic, claiming this simple procedure will bring the crisis to a swift and straightforward resolution. Some parents may be tempted to give this option serious consideration for similar reasons.

Abortion is not a procedure like an appendectomy that eradicates a piece of diseased tissue. It ends a human life that is designed to develop in a continuous process from conception through birth and beyond. Because this life is unseen for now, its identity and significance may pale in comparison to the problems and concerns of the moment. That developing person whose life is in the hands of her mother and those influencing her, cannot speak for herself. Like it or not, even under the most trying circumstances, that new person is not better off dead.

Your daughter should consider making an appointment with a local pregnancy resource center (often called a crisis pregnancy center or CPC) in order to sort through the issues, gather information and consider her options in a compassionate setting. Even if she has strong opinions about what her course of action should be, a pregnancy center can be an extremely valuable resource. Services available at most centers include a realistic assessment of the impact of each option, ongoing counseling support, assistance with medical and other referrals, and maternity clothes and baby supplies. Many centers also provide some on-site medical services such as prenatal screening exams. All of these services are normally provided at no charge. (For the name and location of a pregnancy resource center in your area, contact 1-800-A FAMILY.)

It is important that capable and compassionate medical care be maintained throughout the pregnancy. Many pregnant teens delay or avoid seeking appropriate care for a variety of reasons. But adolescents have higher rates of complications related to pregnancy and childbirth compared to older women. Most of these problems can be significantly reduced (or at least anticipated) with consistent prenatal visits and appropriate medical follow-up.

Excerpted from “Let’s Talk About Sex,” published by Focus on the Family. Copyright © 1998 Focus on the Family.

Answer 2

A lot of things. Probably way too many to count. It will also depend on how much support she has from her parents, friends, siblings and the baby's father. If I had to say what the biggest emotional experience to over come was it would have to be the fact that you feel you have ruined the rest of your life and quite possible someone else's. What if you're not a good mom, what if you can't take care of the babies needs. Should you give it up for adoption? Will you love it enough? It's horrible. All I can say is the teen should take it one day at a time. There isn't anything you can do about the past, just live one day at a time and try to make good choices daily. Everything happens for a reason, even if you don't know what it is yet. I think if I hadn't gotten pregnant at 15, I would have turned out in a very bad place. I was headed for jail or worse. Now, 21 years later, I have a great job, two great kids and I am able to take care of myself. Not sure you needed that much info, but if you ever need someone to chat with personal experience, you can email me at [e-mail]

Answer 3

As a young person, u would want 2 go out there & enjoy life. Party, hang out with friends, u know, live a little. As a parent, u will have restrictions. U can't go & come as u want anymore b'cuz u have responsibilities. When u realise this, u may get depressed & not enjoy life like u used 2 b4 u were a parent. Adults can handle the pressure of being a parent b'cuz they already experienced youth and r cool with settling down. Teenagers r not ready 4 that kind of commitment.

Answer 4

She will miss her social life.She wil come to know what real stress is.Most times she will become resentful because she will be a single parent,and because the guys life is virtually unchanged.She will no longer be able to think about herself solely.She may even feel embarrased at times,or like an outcast.Her life is changed forever....even if she has an abootion or puts the baby up for adoption.Her world as she knew it will become a thing of the past,and that can be scary.

Answer 5

She feels like some outcast. like she has done the worst thing possible by falling in love with a guy and trusting him. regrets not using precautions. and sometimes hates the unborn baby for causing her all this emotional stress.wonders how she will finance the kid and give it a good future. wonders if the baby will make the same mistakes she did. all she really needs is love and to be told that no matter what happens she will still be loved and so will her baby.

Answer 6

Your going to go through a lot. I'm a teen mom as well, it's not easy. Your going to have a lot of different people pressuring you to do different things. With me my family was pressuring me to adopt, but it wasn't right for me. I kept my daughter and i'm doing fine. Things are more challenging now, (like trying to go to school and raise a kid) but it's workingitself out. And if your parents or family aren't being supportive now, they'll come around after the baby is born. There are a lot of places out there for teen moms when they need support, talk to your doctor and see what he advises as far as help out there for young moms. If your fighting with the choice of adoption, do what you think is best for you and the baby, follow your heart, i did and it was for the best.
Also you may not have the social life you did before but you'll still have friends. I never lost any of mine their pretty understanding and work around my scheduele when we want to do our thing.
If you need some advice or have anymore questions about being a teen mom, feel free to e-mail me.

Answer 7

alot.... fear of regection from her friends, wondering what other people will think of her, will she be a great parent just because she's a teen,how is she going to be able to finish school, will she be able to get a good enough job where they wont look at the fact she had a child out of wedlock and is she going to have to take off work every time the baby is sick because shes not married and dont have alot of help..... theres a number of things. i was a teen parent and believe me. its not the easiest thing in the world. but i wouldnt trade it for a thing...

Answer 8

All situations are different. There is no exact way that you should be feeling, talk to your doctor and ask them if your emotions are a little more unusal.

Answer 9

You mean what types of emotions will you have while being pregnant?

If so, you'll go through EVERY emotion imaginable. Crying from simple commercials, extreme highs & lows, nesting..........your hormones are all intensified....so be prepared.

Answer 10

theres a lot to a situation like the one your in
if your the one whos pregnant.
you really have to experience it for yourself
and others can probably give you no more then information
and or guidance

Answer 11

Panic when here water breaks durring a mid term.....Teens should not get pregant