My spouse smokes marijuana. I don't want to be with a woman that does this. How do I convince her to stop?

Question

She didn't smoke before we got married.

She keeps it in her car, and rides around with the kids with her (in her defense, she does not smoke around me or the kids)

Answer 1

That's a toughie. My hubby used to do the same thing a long time ago. I didn't like it and we talked about it. I told him it was illegal and he said he knew. He said it helped him feel better (he had cancer a few years before that). Finally, the day came, just a few months after I asked him to stop, that he did. The best thing to do is tell your wife how you feel, ask her to stop and then let her alone. If you badger her, she will be less likely to quit than if you just ask her to stop and let it go.

Answer 2

Did she smoke it before you got married? If so, you knew this when you married her and you should not expect her to change. One mistake many many couples make is that their marriage winds up being more like a parent/child relationship than an equal partnership. If you try to change your spouse, more times than not, rebellion or distrust will start to occur.

I know of two relationships where my girl friends (I'm a woman) divorced their husbands for smoking pot. It's not that the men weren't willing to stop, it was the resentment that their wives were treating him like a child. I can't believe my friends would ruin a relationship over pot.

Pot is very harmless, much less harmful than alcohol or cigarrettes. If it were heroin or crack, I'd be far more concerned.

Answer 3

Pot is not the worst thing in the world for her to be doing.I think as long as she takes care of business and doesnt slack off and smoke pot all the time or around kids or people who dont like it it should be her problem.if it affects her in bad ways get help.

Answer 4

I am a drug therapist. Unfortunately the codependent spouse who cares more for the relationship than the selfish user suffers the most. Don't be fooled. Actions speak louder than words. Demand recovery from her or file the papers. Your pain will be shorter or your joy sooner. Good luck.

Answer 5

It ain't happening. Her excuse will be
"When u ask'd me out (if u did) u accepted the fact that i did drugs, so y do u expect me 2 change now."
Then u'll probably say
"R u willing to ruin a good thing coz of ur weed?"
She won't respond, then things will start going downhill.
U can't change things u have no control over. Accept her or move on.

Answer 6

Did she smoke this before marriage? If so, it will be more difficult to ask her to stop. If it began afterward, then let her know how you feel about this, and how much it will affect your relationship to give her the option of giving it up or her marriage to you.

Answer 7

Whats wrong with toking up here and there? It's a hell of a lot better for you than cigarette smoking or alcohol.

Answer 8

Simple: you tell her what you just told us. "I don't want to spend the rest of my life with a woman who smokes pot." Then she'll have to make the choice.

Answer 9

Tell her how you feel. Discuss with her what she is doing to her body and how it is effecting your relationship. Obviously it is not going to get any better when she keeps up this habit. She needs help.

Answer 10

just give her the option, its either you or the drugs and see which one she loves more. And if she does not choose you then you probably don't need the relationship anyhow