I love the girl I am with, but am scared of marriage. We recently got engaged which should be an exciting time, but I feel anxious and scared. I am confused, please help!
2006-07-06 02:57:52 · 41 answers · asked by badbasco423 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You should wait a little to spend more time with her, enjoy being engaged and feel more comfortable with the idea of gettig married. sometimes people are engaged for over 5 years!
2006-07-06 03:00:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Anxious & scared--sounds like excitement to me! Have you talked to her about this feeling? Have you talked to anyone in your family about how you feel--or anyone who's known you for a long time? Give that a shot before you go any further. Everyone gets a little "freaked out" when they realize they are chosing to spend the rest of their lives with one person. Marriage does make you change things about your life. It makes you look at the big picture and see things that you've never thought much about. If you love this girl enough to get engaged, you should be honest enough with her to let her know how you are feeling now--she's probably feeling the same way, or will be soon! The key to all relationships is COMMUNICATION--you've got to talk honestly to each other about EVERYTHING or it just doesn't work. Congratulations and good luck!
2006-07-06 03:05:59 · answer #2 · answered by tkltafoya 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a big step.
Feeling anxious and scared is normal. Only you, and the whole male (exaggeration) population feels the same when it comes to marriage and commitment. Just relax, and take things in your stride. Keep focus on your dreams, and your future. If you can do that, without the anxiety, and you still see your lover as a huge part of your future, go with it.
If you're unsure, maybe consider holding things off before increasing the already ridiculously high divorce rate.
2006-07-06 03:04:04 · answer #3 · answered by Medicated Harmony 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is just pre wedding jitters. Everyone gets nervous and wonders if everything will be O.K. If you two are really in love than it will be fine. If you just got engaged give it some time to be engaged. Just because you just got engaged doesn't mean you have to get married right now. Some people are engaged for years. Not saying that you should do that either though.
2006-07-06 03:01:08 · answer #4 · answered by noseygirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congratulations. You are making progress in life. My husband and I dated for 11 yrs. He was so scared like you. He was mama's boy. He made all this excuses. I will not tell you cause then you will go back on her.
If you feel comfortable with her, agree on most of the things you do or think together, that will definitely work out.
We are now married for almost 10 years and have a darling 6 yr. old angel.
Hey GUYS = IMPORTANT = never promise sex three times a day, that will not happen. LOL
May God guide you in this relationship and Bless you in many ways, :)
2006-07-06 03:06:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not 100% sure with no doubts in your mind than it is not time yet to committ. Everyone is nervous when that big day comes but it should'nt be about your future wife, it should just be about the event and having everything go as planned. Making a marriage work is in both your hands, if you say this will last forever than it will. If your not sure save your heart for another time or person.
2006-07-06 03:05:08 · answer #6 · answered by davidjudyrices 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone gets anxious and nervous. Some people just get it worse than others. You definitely need to talk to her and be open about it. If you aren't absolutely convinced, it doesn't necessarily mean she's not the one for you, it just means it's not time yet. Push it back a little while until you can learn for yourself whether you are truly prepared. If she isn't willing to work with you on it, then she isn't the great person you think she is.
2006-07-06 03:02:18 · answer #7 · answered by deathbywedgie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am also a man (living in Brazil) and hear me:dont get married!!
The best thing is having a girlfriend, not a wife. After the marriage, girls transform themselves and begin hell in the life of the man. My own experience. I did that and today i thing there is no way to go back because it is too complicated. The wonderful thing is being single, but with girlfriend(s) And if she is blond and beutyfull, what should you want more?
2006-07-06 03:04:41 · answer #8 · answered by Cowboy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's not the right girl for you. When you find the right one, it won't be scary at all - you will surprised at how calm you are. I ended a 2 year relationship with a man who wanted to marry me, 8 months before meeting my now husband. It was a hard decision but the thought of marrying him just freaked me out and I couldn't commit to it. When I met my husband, we both knew we were right for each other immediately. A month after dating we went ring shopping, he proposed 3 months later, then we saved up our money for our dream wedding and now we've been married nearly a year. Believe me, when you know, you won't be worried about a thing - it will happen almost effortlessly.
2006-07-06 02:59:52 · answer #9 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
congratulations.you are halfway there....see i have got married and still i feel anxious and uncertain ...it is always so with our fickle minds...we are not sure of ourselves how can we expect to totally accept another person and be sure of their love ....its a huge challenge. but if you can get yourself to just trust yourself and bear with it for a time you will get the fruits of your patience in the form of discovery of mutual affection which will show up in ways you never expected...that is an important thing- dont worry that everything is not going as in a romance novella or a movie...what society believes about romance is very different from what actually happens when two people live together...it is awkward sometimes, sometimes boring, and sometimes real hard work...so just hang in there and discover how deep is your love and what you are capable of....
2006-07-06 03:07:26 · answer #10 · answered by mnachuri 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋