LADIES ONLY - What's the deal????

Question

So, I posted a question a few days ago about a relationship I had a while back with a girl who was 18 years younger than me. A lot of you all came at me with "stop dating children!" and "you're sick!" and stuff like that. Essentially, I am a monster for being in a relationship with a woman of consenting age.

So then today I read a question written by a woman about how she's dating a guy who's over 20 years her junior....and all the women responders are being SUPPORTIVE!!! Now, COME ON! What the...? Why is it OK for a woman to date a guy 20 years younger but not for a guy to date a girl who's of similar age difference? I don't JUST date young women. I date whomever comes along who I like, young/old, doesn't matter. But I'm called "sick"? Someone explain this double standard INTELLIGENTLY!

For the record, NO ONE in this situation is talking about being with someone under the age of 18. As I sad before, my ex was of consenting age.

Answer 1

Women think that they should be treated like gold and they are very supportive of their kind, and they move to strike men with extreme prejudice, you can't help but admit to it that they will keep double standards when it comes to them. As long as you are true to your girl, and she is true to you..you mustn't care about what some idiots on the internet have to say about your personal life. Those who are able to understand what a mature relationship is all about, will respond accordingly..besides try and find out the average age of the people who responded to you in an unpleasant manner, you'd get the idea why you got the response the way you did...And yes women always keep double standards..
They keep double standards between people whom they like(lovers, women, family, pets and their favorite stuff) and people they don't like(rest of the people and stuff)

Answer 2

Regardless of age similarity or difference, it is more important that you have some kind of common interests (besides sex). I would not downgrade anyone for choosing someone younger or older if they had common interests and were suited to each other. Some younger people are quite mature for their age and like to do things that most older adults enjoy, while some older people are still having a great time enjoying their inner youthful feelings with people who hold similar interests. (and I don't mean that as second childhood - I mean it as a person who still feels young and has similar interests to a younger person). If you are sincere in your relationship and are not in it just to gain a bit of sexual encounters, go for it if you are both of consenting age and both feel that the relationship is right for you. There are times I don't see how a relationship is correct, but that is because the young adult is really wanting to relive a messed up life with the parent and is using the older person - or the older adult is trying to capture a lost youth and thinks he or she will gain it through being with a younger person. I think there should be no double standard though, as each person is unique, as is each situation. I agree - toss out the double standard. (I am only 2.5 years younger than hubby, but I still can have an opinion).

Answer 3

I don't exactly understand the double standard either. As long as the person who is younger is legal, I don't see a problem. I get what you mean though. Men in the situation are seen as molesters, and women are praised (that is so jacked up.) Example: The Mary Kay Latourneu (not sure if spelled right) story was sick. It's never right for a thirty-six year old married woman with kids to get impregnated (twice) by her thirteen year old student. But she got a movie made about her and her "story." That's just sick and wrong. The double standard in your situation is almost the same as the misconception that only men rape people. Men are considered more dominant, therefore, it seems as if they somehow trick the younger woman with their experience or their force. I'm not sure if my answer can be considered intelligent, but oh well, hope it helps.

Answer 4

Okay - I was not one of "those" responders to your original post. I am female and I am 42. In all honesty, when I hear of a man the age of myself and/or husband, dating a girl my daughter's age (22), I do not care for it. But there are two specific reasons:
1. I assume the guys is only out for sex.
2. I am feeling every bit of 42 at that point and I am a tad bit jealous that my 20 something years are long gone.
It is unusual for a woman to date a man 20 years her jr unless she has money. Thus, your attraction. Same for a 42 year old male dating a 22 year old female, is it really about being "in-love?"

Answer 5

Okay so what I think is going on is that women tend to think that men are only dating a younger woman because they are sleazy, and 't cant get a woman their own age so they prey on younger women who are less mature/intelligent. And women can date a younger man because it shows that we too can be the dominant one in a relationship. I too think that it is unfair the double standard on the ages of dating with men and women. I think if there are two consenting people in a relationship then that is fine with me. I hope I answered your question okay

Answer 6

Uh I don't know if I answered your question then or a similar one, but my answer was that as long as you are both consenting ADULTS there was no problem with it. When people say "this many years difference" without telling actual ages, I'm sure that a lot of people will jump to the conclusion that she was too young. Maybe that'll teach you to use the actual age instead of the difference in ages.

Answer 7

Easy, sour grapes, men with looks and intellect and possibly wealth are More likely to have younger hotter women (for a time).

I don't blame you, but I worry about your prorities and your criteria for women.

After my divorce I dated a man 8 years younger than I. It was huge fun, but I had two children and fun was a luxury as was the younger man. I enjoyed him and my time with him, but I found and built a life with a man three months older than I.

Going on 28 yrs.

"you can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you get what you need" (Rolling Stones).

If you love somebody, it doesn't matter a bit what other people think.

Nuff said.

Answer 8

It does sound like the pot calling the kettle black doesn't it? Who cares what others think as long as she or he is of age. Age means nothing and women are catty when they find out men their age want someone younger. Jealousy? probably.... and I also have seen younger women look for older men and older women looking for younger men so it's a two way street. I wouldn't take it to heart what anyone else says. Only you can answer what you feel :) If she's happy and your happy? Don't shed a tear for anyones comments, most talk out their rear any way :) Enjoy life :)

Answer 9

Auuuuuuush well to be honest I dont see a problem..I mean ..wait what the! thats a little to old dont you think sexy? I dont date guys who are younger than me even if they are 3 days younger! I feel weird when I do so I just stick to men my age or older..the max age I would date would be 32 years old but I am 20 =-) so thats 12 years of a diferencia papi asi que ojala that helps you out =-)

Angie

PS: To All of you from fresno..dont forget to support FRESNO STATE!

Answer 10

The media influences there answers. Its just a big stereotype. A "accident" (by that i mean when one partner kills,rapes assaults ,abuses etc the other partner) rarely happens with the older woman dating the younger guy. Most of those "accidents" happen b tween the older guy younger girl relationships. All i can say is that its just a stereotype.