What do I do now?

Question

I talked to my ex on the phone tonight.He kept saying he acted the way he did while we were dating because he hadn't had sex in so long.He kept appologizing but at the same time he kept saying that I should expect men to want sex most of the time.I told him that that sounded disrespectful to me.He appologized again and then he kept asking me questions about our past relationship and what I liked and disliked about it and the sexual stuff?He just kept saying well I am a guy and I get confused about what women want and how they act.I told him what I expected in a relationship and what kind of sexual things I liked and didn't like.Then he was like well can I do that sexual thing to you tonight.I again got upset.I told him that I like being the aggressor when it comes to sex.He was like I am willing to let you be the aggressor about sex and we'll just go out, no sex.I told him that would be fine but don't think he'd treat me right.Do I ignore him?Tell him no?See if he sticks to his word?

Answer 1

First, it is GREAT that the two of you can talk about things that most people would run from!

Communication is half the battle in having a good relationship.

The problem may be that he was taught that the MAN is the aggressor in relationships, so he is confused as what to do.

He apparently wants to do what is right for both of you.

I suggest that you two keep talking and working on compromises that will make both happy. Make BOTH of you the driver, AND both of you the passenger. Take turns.

Be thankful for having this unusual and special relationship.

Answer 2

Well, my husband was a 33 year old virgin at the alter. He was a total breath of fresh air. I was way to used to (being used) having men who said "I love you" but meant "I want to jump your bones." I always questioned if I stopped having sex with these men, would they still date me. I never felt that way with my husband, and although sex is important, it's not the focus of the relationship and never has been. Not ALL men are driven only by sex in a relationship. Don't ever do anything you don't want to do. If you have to ask if your should, that's a pretty good hint that it's something you don't really want to do!

Answer 3

Guys get really how do you say "weird" when they don't get sex in awhile. The com must cloud they head or something. hahaha. Give him another chance, and see if he sticks to his word and if not what do you have to lose. A few hours spent with him big deal.

Answer 4

Let this guy go..
This sounds like a bad relationship in the making, with a broken heart for you to follow soon..
Go on with your life and date someone you are compatible with and is completly understanding to your morals and feelings, let him find a girl to play with like he wants to..

Answer 5

Give him a chance people change, and you never know maybe one day in bed while having sex, you can mess with his mind, and tie him or somethign to the bed adn leave him there! and tell him that he better treat you right or else!!

Answer 6

i know truckloads of guys, n they don't get crazy like that when they haven't had sex in a while (i'm talkin friggin AGES here). that boy is just odd.

Answer 7

It is good that he wants to have sex with you and nobody else.. ya'll will work it out

Answer 8

He will say anything he has to to get his way! I know, I'm a guy.

Answer 9

stop messing with his head just do it u knowu want and you know he wants it

Answer 10

if you feel that strongly why be with him at all