English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

2006-07-05 16:12:30 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music Jokes & Riddles

13 answers

A young man goes into a pharmacy and says to the pharmacist,
"Hello, could you give me condom. I'm going to my girlfriends for dinner
and I think I may be in with a chance!" The pharmacist gives him the condom and as the young man is going out;
he returns and says, "Give me another condom because my girlfriend's sister is very cute too.
She always crosses her legs in a provocative manner when she sees me and I think I might strike it lucky there too."
The pharmacist gives him a second condom and as the boy is leaving he turns back and says,
"Go on, give me one more condom because my girlfriend's mum is still pretty cute and when she sees me she always makes eyes
, and since she invited me for dinner, I think she is expecting me to make a move!
During dinner, the young man is sitting with his girlfriend on his left,
the sister on his right and the mum facing him. When the dad gets there, the boy lowers his head and starts praying,
"Dear Lord, bless this dinner and thank you for all you give us." A minute later the boy is still praying; "Thank you Lord for your kindness.
" Ten minutes go by and the boy is still praying, keeping his head down. The others look at each other surprised and his girlfriend is even more surprised than the others.
She gets close to the boy and says in his ear, "I didn't know you were so religious." The boy replies, "I didn't know your dad was a pharmacist!"



GOERGE BUSH IN SCHOOL: -

George Bush goes to a primary school to give a speech.
After his talk he offers question time.

One little boy puts up his hand and George asks him what his name is. "Bob".
"And what is your question, Bob?"

"I have 3 questions.
First, Why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?
Second, Why are you President when Kerry got more votes?
And third, what happened to Osama Bin Laden?

Just then the bell rings for recess. George Bush informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess.

When they resume George says, "OK, where were we?
Oh that's right --- question time. Who has a question?"

A different little boy puts up his hand . George points him out and asks him what his name is. "Steve"
"And what is your question, Steve?"

"I have 5 questions.
First, Why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?
Second, Why are you President when Kerry got more votes?
Third, What happened to Osama Bin Laden?
Fourth, Why did the recess bell go 20 minutes early?!
And fifth, where is "Bob"? !

2006-07-06 15:50:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

♥ The funniest joke on earth is the one that makes you laugh 'til you cry. I like when a Pakistani tries to explain anything in a serious manner- does not matter what... I laugh like mad.

2006-07-05 16:16:15 · answer #2 · answered by ••Mott•• 6 · 0 0

the funniest joke on earth is:

you heard it, you laugh out loud, your stomach hurts and you are farting for too much laughing, your eyes are full of tears and your body is shaking and dirty because you roll on the floor while laughing. if you can experience that, then it is , by no means is THE FUNNIEST JOKE ON EARTH.

2006-07-05 16:23:34 · answer #3 · answered by danny boy 2 · 0 0

God and the Harley Davidson Inventor


Arthur Davidson, the inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, died and went to heaven.

At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur, "Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."

Arthur thought about it for a minute, then said, "I want to hang out with God."

St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room and introduced him to God.

God recognized Arthur and commented, "Okay, so you were the one who invented the Harley Davidson motorcycle?"

Arthur said, "Yep, that's me."

God said, "Well, what's the big deal in inventing something that's pretty unstable, makes noise and pollution and can't run without a road?"

Arthur was apparently embarrassed, but finally he said, "Excuse me, but aren't You the inventor of woman?"

God said, "Yes."

"Well," said Arthur, "professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your invention:

1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusions;

2. It chatters constantly at high speeds;

3. Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much;

4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust;

5. And the maintenance costs are enormous!"

"Hmmmmm, you have some good points there," replied God, "hold on."

God went to His Celestial super computer, typed in a few words and waited for the results.
The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it.

"Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed," God said to Arthur, "but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours."

2006-07-06 19:55:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I failed my motive force’s attempt. the guy asked me “what do you do at a purple easy?” I pronounced, I don’t know… seem around, pay attention to the radio What can holiday around the area. yet remains in one corner? A stamp=] 3 adult adult males Are status in court whilst they have been arrested at a lake.The decide asked the 1st guy what he grew to become into doing and the guy spoke back”i grew to become into throwing peanuts interior the lake”.The decide says ok u didnt do something incorrect.The decide asks the 2d guy what he did incorrect and the guy replies”i grew to become into throwing peanuts interior the lake besides”the decide purely smiles and says u did no longer something incorrect the two.The decide asks the 0.33 guy if he grew to become into throwing peanuts interior the lake besides and the guy replies”No Mam i'm Peanuts” here’s a protracted yet good humorous tale: a guy in his 40s offered a sparkling BMW and grew to become into out employing on the interstate at precise velocity whilst he unexpectedly observed flashing purple and blue lights at the back of him. “There’s no way they are able to seize a BMW,” he thought to himself and speeded up much extra. Then the fact of the situation hit him, “What the heck am I doing?” he thought and pulled over. The cop got here as much as him, took his license without a be conscious, and examined it and the motor vehicle. “It’s been a protracted day, that's the tip of my shift, and it’s Friday the thirteenth. I don’t experience like extra workplace work, so in case you are going to be able to supply me an excuse on your employing that I haven’t heard till now, you are able to pass.” the guy thinks for a 2d and says, “final week my spouse ran off with a cop. i grew to become into afraid you have been attempting to supply her back.” & my final one buddy!... how do u awaken woman GaGa? you Poke Her Face

2016-12-10 05:14:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

What's Irish and sits around the pool? Patty O'Furniture

2006-07-05 16:15:26 · answer #6 · answered by mightyskid 3 · 0 0

why did the blond girl have sex with the Mexican guy? Her professor told her to do an essay. Hahahahahahaha.

2006-07-05 16:29:36 · answer #7 · answered by Sappho 4 · 0 0

person 1:so three smart blondes walked up to the university

person 39383739478:then what?

person 1:i don't know.i woke up.

2006-07-05 16:24:26 · answer #8 · answered by sherbert 5 · 0 0

Ok
I used to hate going to weddings, because all the old folks would poke me and say “you’re next” they soon stopped that s*** when I started doing it to them, at funerals… HAHAHAHAHAHA

2006-07-05 16:40:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Gilmores joke!!!

2006-07-05 16:17:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

fedest.com, questions and answers