This guy and I dated while in college. He was very immature. Recently, I got in touch with him and we've been e-mailing. We've spoken over the phone twice since I contacted him. I contacted him a week ago. He is so mature now and I am attracted to the fact that he is so well established and seems to be much more grown up. I called him on July 3rd and told him he could call me the next day--he didn't. I would like to see him but, I feel that he should ask me since I put myself out there by contacting him, not knowing his status--married, dating, or engaged. I haven't seen him yet, but I feel like I want more from him than a friendship. I don't know if I should call him since he didn't call me or what. I don't want to look too anxious. But, I know what I want. What do I do.
2006-07-05 15:57:50 · 10 answers · asked by kerijbush 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
INSTEAD OF ASKING ONE OF US, I SUGGEST GOING TO HIM AND BRINGING IT UP IN A WAY THAT DOES NOT OBLIGATE HIM TO SAY YES OR NO IMMEDIATELY. LIKE, SAY YOU INVITE HIM TO A PARTY ON THE WEEKEND AND OFFER HIM A NICE HIGHBALL OR A GLASS OF WINE AND RELAX. BE COOL, MAN AND JUST MENTION IN CASUALLY AFTER ASKING HIM STUFF, LIKE DO YOU LIKE MY NEW TOP AND HOW WAS THE HOCKEY GAME AND ARE YOU MOVING OUT OF YOUR APT. SOON? IT WILL BE GOOD. FROM MICHELLE.
2006-07-05 16:03:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you said you know what you want so...Just kidding. OK so you had the courage to call him, good. I say give him 3 days to call you back, he is probably thinking like you, when you say "I don't want to look anxious." Sometimes people may seem more mature, but in reality it takes some time for one to really notice it. You can't tell through e-mails if he has fully matured, just be patient. It is ok for you to e-mail him, but wait the 3 days. Why didn't you ask him this stuff when you contacted him? It's ok to ask, besides you would be asking as a friend, because you really don't know if he really has changed. A person could be "well established" and still have a mind of a child. Is this real love or are you just attracted to the fact that he is "well established?" Think about these things. When three days pass by send another e-mail saying you just wanted to catch up on your friendship, if he is married, has any children... It is ok to ask. I believe that is why so many women end up with these bad relationships the first place, because they never asked, they just wanted to live in fantasy land. My point, just ask...
2006-07-05 16:10:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's interested in more than friendship, you asking him out and/or telling him that won't scare him off.
If he isn't, then no matter how you break it to him, it's gonna scare him.
First thing, you need to find out what his situation is...married, engaged, in a committed relationship, single.
Then ask him out. If he says yes, it gives you a chance to see if there is a spark between the two of you. If he says no, I guess you needn't worry about anything else.
I think I would wait til you get to know each other again before you tell him you want to have his babies tho...lol. Give him some time to see if he likes you that way or not. If you can't tell within 7-8 dates whether you could be more than friends, odds are you can't be.
If you like him, and it turns out you can't be more than friends...accept him as that. You can never have too many friends.
2006-07-05 16:07:30 · answer #3 · answered by jimmy h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you really don't know what you want!!! Back off!! He may call you but you are being pushy! If you have not seen him and only talked to him on the phone......how can you say that he is what you want??? Could it be that your comment of him being "so well established" have anything to do with finances? He probably gets the same vibes I do......you are a fortune hunter. He was not good enough for you before.....but, now that he is more "mature", suddenly things are different. Perhaps you are the one who needs to grow up......you sound very immature to me.
2006-07-05 16:05:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The same thing you would want a guy to do to let you know. Women changed the playing field and guys appreciate a little forwardness too. Don't approach him like a slut, but make it clear you want to see him.
2006-07-05 16:03:33 · answer #5 · answered by fortuitousoppty 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't call him. It sounds like you've done everything you can to make the relationship progress - if he wants it to go further, he has got to make the next move.
2006-07-05 16:03:40 · answer #6 · answered by freespiritpassingthrough 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my suggestion is to easily talk over with him without being pushy. purely tell him the way you experience by way of fact he might desire to experience the same way and additionally be fearful to particular it. in the journey that your too scared to taake the 1st step, you are going to be able to on no account attain the end line. in the journey that your coronary heart quite desires to be with him purely choose for it!!! good luck !!
2016-12-10 05:13:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would let him make the first move. If he doesn't make it, then he may not be interested. Does he know your status? If not, make it known and see if he responds.
2006-07-05 16:02:07 · answer #8 · answered by Shorty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk 2 him
2006-07-05 16:01:32 · answer #9 · answered by . 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wasting your time
2006-07-05 16:02:25 · answer #10 · answered by Kelsey G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋