I am 20 years old. I had my first boyfriend when I was 16. We were together for 3 years. It was the typical relationship. Jealousies, insecurities, doubts, fights, fears, and even lust. We are both christians and the broken relationship has deeply affected our individual lives since the break-up. We both have learned so many things out of the experience. Including what really love is. The major problem was our past lives. We grew up differently but both of us had a not-so-normal childhood. We were both trained to be the best we can be. I was a musician and a consistent honor student ever since and he was too. We actually met at church. We've been together in the praise and worship team for 6 years and we've been friends for more than 10 years.
It was he who finally said it has to be over... I was so hurt... I feel like a dumpee. And now, after a year, he has realized but he's still fickle minded. I still love him but I'm too scared. But i've told him that i can't anymore. Am i right?
2006-07-05 14:54:29 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you want to be with him and love him... be with him. If it doesn't work, at least you wont regret not giving it a go AND maybe if it doesn't work he can be the dumpee.
2006-07-05 14:57:40 · answer #1 · answered by bluechick 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you are right! In this case, he just not that into you if you ask me.
The love you have for him was puppy love and now I dont think you are in love with him still. You just love him for the fact that you guys have gone through times together at high school! Still you have a little bit of feeling toward him. Sure, you are human. However deep down inside you too scared which translate to 'unsure' just like he is. So read the sign!
Why not pursuing your man of the dream by focusing other than him. He is still unsure and how long you will be able to wait? Dont wait because life goes on. Not fair because you are still young. You are commited and persistant. One of these days you will meet your man but it the meantime channel your energy and make your options open a bit.
2006-07-05 22:10:26 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you're right & very lucky to able to see he's fickle minded now rather than get back into a relationship & waste your life.
Concentrate on what you love to do: what makes you feel happy without that niggling worry in the background. Try dating someone else just to find out what other guys are like without the pressure of a long-term relationship.
2006-07-05 22:05:55 · answer #3 · answered by Annie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a tricky one, I know you don't like to hear that "you're still young" but you are. Because you know the Lord...PRAY! Evaluate how your life is WITHOUT him. Don't think about all those "cute" thinks he used to do or the things that REALLY made you angry. Think about those "average" times, and compare it to now. Are you content and at peace when he's not around? If so, I would just remain a "distant" friend of his and maybe after a while God will bring you two back together. After saying all that, the most important thing you can do is PRAY AND WAIT ON THE LORD!
2006-07-05 22:08:19 · answer #4 · answered by IluvtheLORD!! 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey you have to ask yourself a couple of questions. Can you live with out him? Have you had a hard time seeing him and knowing that your not together any more? Why was he treating you like that? Those are some of the questions that you need to ask yourself because if you get the answers that you need you will get back with him. Finally....you realy need to follow your heart he noes best 4 you! hope that this works out for the best.
-kelci
2006-07-06 11:38:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the big question you have to ask yourself is : was he by himself for the last year, or did he dump you to be with someone else and it didn't work out. if it's the latter, then you would be a fool to consider going back with him, if he was by himself and just took that time to grow as a person, you can't hold that against him. sometimes it's easier to see a problem if you get a new perspective. if the new perspective was a hot little blonde in a pair of daisy dukes, then save yourself some grief and walk away.
2006-07-05 22:02:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you have a complicated situation. I think the main question you need to ask yourself is " have things changed enough between us that our relationship could work this time". If you don't think so then yes you have done the right thing by moving on. Just be careful it is far easier to fall back in to something familiar than it is to try something new.
2006-07-05 22:02:35 · answer #7 · answered by Dan H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you have done the right thing by telling him. True love is difficult to find and if you fell that way, it was good that he knows. And remember to ask God what he thinks you should do too! I hope it all works out for the best.!
2006-07-05 22:00:19 · answer #8 · answered by aries 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give the relationship another 3 to 6 months. It's not about being right or wrong, it's about being happier together or apart.
2006-07-05 22:01:43 · answer #9 · answered by Rick A 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow. i dont mean to push the arrow deeper, but it sounds like a really great relationship you were in. why did he end it?
anyway, if you still love him, not lust or miss what you had but truly love him, go tell him. he deserves to know, and you won't be stuck wondering "what if?" and dont be afraid to get hurt. its better to love and be hurt than to be lonely
2006-07-05 21:59:33 · answer #10 · answered by Steph 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋