10 points to whomever makes me laugh the hardest.
2006-07-05 11:23:07 · 12 answers · asked by Julie6962 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Kindergarten Class
The kindergarten teacher is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word "definitely" to them.
To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence.
When called upon the first student says " The sky is definitely blue".
The teacher said " Well that isn't entirely correct because sometimes it's gray and cloudy".
Another student says "Grass is definitely green".
The teacher again replies, " If grass doesn't get enough water it turns brown, so that isn't really correct".
Another student raises his hand and asks the teacher "Do farts have lumps?".
The teacher replied, "No, and that is not a suitable question for class discussion".
The student replies, "Then I definitely s_h_i_t my pants"
2006-07-06 20:04:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A women goes to the doctors office and says "Doctor you have to help me... I have got this problem, I can't stop farting. I fart all the time only they are silent and don't stink. As a matter of fact, I've farted 20 times just now talking to you". The doctor fills out a prescription and tells the lady to take these and come back in a week. A week later the lady comes back to the doctors office."Doctor, doctor you must help me. Now things are worse. I'm still farting all the time, they are still silent, but now they smell something awful. You must do something. What were those pills you gave me?" The doctor replied, "Oh don't worry, those pills were just to fix your sinus condition, now we have to work on your hearing.
2006-07-05 18:44:11 · answer #2 · answered by Stu S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a kid was batting around a red baloon and it landed in the toilet. he left it there and went on doing something else. his mom came home later with a case of the trots. she didnt look in the toilet, just lifted the lid and did some projectile defecation. when she got up, she looked down and saw the red object covered with poop. she immediatly called the doctor and over he came.looked into the toilet and said hed never seen anything like it. he grabbed a scalpel and poked it. it exploded all over him and the lady. he looked at her and said, i think we are the only 2 people in the world that has ever seen a fart. dammit man, that was hard
2006-07-05 18:41:45 · answer #3 · answered by chris l 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
now I sit broken hearted Tried to **** instead I farted
Just playin for real we was at the dinner table and my brother can fart on cue so he let a long one rip then I started then my whole family started so then another one of my relatives came in and said who been cooking the greens
2006-07-05 21:28:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A boy i hate was back of my teacher and all of a soudon a roaring farting sound came out of my teachers but!
2006-07-05 20:24:05 · answer #5 · answered by .......... 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
never in my life have i ever farted a joke. that would be a real talent! how about I burp the alphabet instead?
oh, wait, I misunderstood.
try this...
rapidly say "one smart fella, he felt smart.
two smart fellas, they felt smart.
three smart fellas..."
and continue.you get the idea.
2006-07-05 18:29:44 · answer #6 · answered by scratchwhiplash 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i did make my friends think the teacher farted when i did!
2006-07-05 18:48:44 · answer #7 · answered by raymond92345 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How can you tell if a woman is wearing pantyhose? If she farts, her ankles swell.
2006-07-05 18:29:23 · answer #8 · answered by Trell J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Q: Why do farts stink?
A: So deaf people can enjoy them, too!
2006-07-05 19:14:42 · answer #9 · answered by kennethleemcdaniel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
one time i was having sex and i farted
2006-07-05 18:29:07 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋