i just need some time away from her to explore the possibilties, I have been faithful & so has she ...I'm 47 she is 40, she has 4 kids at home which we must include in almost everything we do, I just miss the single life I guess...she cries everytime I attempt to break up....c'mon help a brother out!!!
2006-07-05 04:31:59 · 43 answers · asked by rahnno 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Be honest with her. Tell her it's not working out and you need some time apart. Don't give her lame excuses. Give her specific reasons. She obviously knows things aren't going too well if you say she cries everytime you try to break up with her.
Your happiness is what ultimately matters. Good luck.
2006-07-05 04:33:49 · answer #1 · answered by Gracie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest to her and yourself. Tell her you think you need time alone. Pick a specific time to test the theory. Less stress is caused if she knows there is a decision point and when it is. Do not keep her waiting forever. Try one, two or three months. See how it works. You may find the down side of being alone agian. If there is someone else be honest with her. Honesty is the best policy. Her crying is normal. Do not let the crying keep both of you in a not so good place. Your love could change. At the end of the trial period let her know you decision. And make one. If she loves you she will want for your happiness as you want for hers if you love her. So be honest with yourself, her, and the children (who may have delovped a relationship with you). Can you remain a good friend of the family or be a member of the family? Even married men with families can get alone time. Is it the single life you miss? Being lonely is not good for man could that be why the helpmate was created. It takes a good man to take on a wife and children all at once. If you have already made the decision .........let her know.........if it is ment to be you will get back together...........true love endures all.
2006-07-05 04:45:13 · answer #2 · answered by transcelestialman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow...that's a hard one to answer....being a woman I can relate to how she feels because it's obvious that she loves you very much but I also understand some of what your saying...just remember that the grass isn't ALWAYS greener on the other side....a lot of people make that mistake and it's sooo sad....I can understand that you might miss the single life but what exactly does that mean?? Do you want to go out and date other women or go to bars and pick someone up?? Would that honestly make you happy? I'm 36 and I have finally decided that going bar hopping and drinking a lot....getting drunk and making a fool out of oneself is so pathetic....been there, done that......Just reme mber that if you two break up, there is a chance that she will find someone else...are you prepared for that? If this is honestly a good woman that you have...all I'm saying is that you give it some serious thought....don't lead her on though...if you are going to break up with her then just do it....don't leave her with thoughts of the two of you getting back together and have her hoping....I've been going through this type of situation for the past 5 years and let me tell you, it's not fun.....because I genuinely love this man and would do anything for him.
Be honest with her and she should be able to appreciate it.....even though it may not be what she wants to hear.
Good Luck to you! I hope you find true happiness.
2006-07-05 04:42:44 · answer #3 · answered by Blue_Girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mid-life crisis - what a shame. I could say you must be mad but you already know that. What do you think you are going to do with your 'freedom'. Absolutely nothing - the young women will think you are pathetic chasing your youth. It's gone, old friend, it is time to get out the slippers and accept the wonderful life that this woman and family appear to have given you. Stop and think, if she wanted her freedom and left you, how do you think you would feel. Devastated. Well that is exactly how she feels. One further point that you should put top of the list. While you are away, she may find someone who will give her the security that she thought she was getting with you. When you return, as no doubt you will, with your tail between your legs, you will find the door well and truly closed, the 'welcome' mat turned upside down and a total absence of yellow ribbons. Don't be a fool. Accept what life has granted you and count your blessings.......
2006-07-05 04:40:24 · answer #4 · answered by thomasrobinsonantonio 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
brother,
Already that you are thinking of breaking up with her is an issue. But you don't have to call it that. It is good that you are faithful don't explore any possibilities (you know) just yet. Just take a distance. And ask her to give you time. If she is going to keep you, tears aren't to be enough. you need something from within. Tell her you need to spend sometime alone and go on and just live! If she is the one, you'll know, then, marry her brother. Otherwise, just go she will find peace.
Best of luck
2006-07-05 04:38:32 · answer #5 · answered by Mounir O 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain it to her. Take her to church or a counselor and have a deep talk. Let her know that you don't want to leave her, but you feel the need to explore the world and it's opportunities. You respect her enough to take some time away rather than put her in a position that could potentially hurt her. If it is meant to be, God will find a way to bring you back together stronger.
2006-07-05 04:34:25 · answer #6 · answered by Pimp_Slapper 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think the fact that she has 4 kids and u have to take care of them is kind of overwelming, and that's why u're looking for some time out. try to explain to her that u love her and that u appreciate her but u feel the need of being on ur own for a while, although she might not understand it especially if u say u want to explore other possibilities. it's sort of complicated but the only way u can do this is to tell her that u need some freedom. just be careful what u say to her if u want her to take u back! good luck, my friend!
2006-07-05 04:43:08 · answer #7 · answered by sweet thing 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Happiness comes from within. If you dont have it with her then you wont have it outside....
When we change things in our life, we never start over but instead we bring our bag of experience, emotions along to wherever we go. I say, you have been 2 years with her...and thats awesome! Remember the reasons why you are with her....dont break away from it. Make it stronger. Build something with her, communicate you need more space, she will understand. I think an open conversation with her will be extremely helpful......find the right time and the right place ... and tell her exactly how you feel.
2006-07-05 04:39:07 · answer #8 · answered by Life is Wonderful 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am going through the same thing too. and i dont know what to do. except i'm in my early 20's and she's in her late teen years. it's annoyin cuz i tried breaking up with her once and for her it's like the world was about to explode!!
i totally understand u man. i guess the best way is decide what's best for u and tell her honestly. she'll cry and hate u. but at the end she'll understand...at least i hope.
good luck man! For both of us and the other guys going thru the samt thing too.
2006-07-05 04:37:33 · answer #9 · answered by Izzo_3x 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it seems to me like you just want more independance. Try and tell her you want to have a night of independance. Hang out with some guy friends, and see if doing something without her makes you feel a little better. If its really the single life you want, then you need to tell her the truth. You can't hide it forever.
2006-07-05 04:35:52 · answer #10 · answered by ♫ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋