I am feeling really depressed and anxious lately. 4 months ago I broke up with my fiance who I had been dating for 4 years. In retrospect I know it was not meant to be. I am in debt $10,000 and had to move back home for the time being to save some money. I am 27 years old and feel like such a loser. I feel like I will never be able to meet anyone living at home now. I am a very good looking guy and can meet women pretty easily, but who would want to date a guy living with his parents? It is not permanent, probably for the next year. I have a decent job where I make $35,000 but now I have to pay off this stupid debt. I feel like I am in such a rut now.
2006-07-05 03:38:33 · 16 answers · asked by James D 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
I know it seems hard, but you can't allways be down on yourself. You are very fourtuinate that your parents are okay with you living with them, and think about it: once you pay off the debt, you can get a cool house of your own agian. As far as meeting people goes- don't meet people just for the sake of meeting people. Meet someone that makes you really happy. If the person you meet likes you, they won't care that you live with your parents.
2006-07-05 03:43:30 · answer #1 · answered by ♫ 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Try not to worry about it too much. Things happen for a reason. But did you break up w/ your fiance just because you had to move back home? If you did, then that may have been a mistake. If she truly loved you and wanted to marry you, then she would have understood your situation and would want to be with you regardless. Maybe you should try talking to her. Sometimes unexpected Crisis pop up and you just have to roll with the punches no matter how bad it is. You'll be fine and things can only get better. Try to keep your head up and don't constantly think about the negative. At least your parents were understanding and caring enough to let you back in their home. I know many parents who would never do that. You still have your job and your car. Not all is lost. There are those who have it a lot worse than you do. Try to count your blessings! It makes things a lot easier. I had to learn to think like that too. You'll be ok. Hang in there!
2006-07-05 03:49:37 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry you feel that way about yourself. But you are doing what is necessary. If women are smart they will realize that you are adult who is making adult decisions and that is to pay off your debt and fix what went wrong in the past.
A smart woman should want to date a guy that is responsible too put his life together and not want to date a guy that is in debt and doesn't care one bit about it.
I think you will be fine you seem to have a smart head on your shoulders and you have a good idea of what you need to do to make your life suitable.
You will find someone. Don't dwell on it too much and don't lower your standards just because you "feel" you have less to offer.
And it is healthy to be in a rut. And I think that you should be in one. When I moved back home just to save money I was in a rut, but now I am over it because I know what I am doing is best for me.
I wish you all the luck and I hope you feel better soon.
Ashley
2006-07-05 03:46:52 · answer #3 · answered by lalala 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with staying with the folks for a while to get back on your feet. You also might think of it this way: at least they are able to help you out; not everyone has family that can. Aside from that, don't be so hard on yourself. It doesn't make you a loser. You were just in a bad situation and now you're taking steps to get out of it. Just keep in mind that the set-up is only temporary. I'd also take the time to focus on you. There are women out there that won't flip out about your living situation, but another woman might not be what you need right now. Hope everything works out for you.
2006-07-05 03:46:17 · answer #4 · answered by francesfarmer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You yourself admitted that this is just a temporary living arrangement. The year might be good for you in that it will help you get over your ex and figure out who you are as an individual (as many couples together than long tend to mesh together personalities and identities). If it really bothers you that much, you might want to speak to a therapist or psychologist about this. Continued depression has an adverse effect on your health, so if the depression itself continues, you do need to seek some help. Chin up, though, at least your are responsible enough to make the efforts to take care of your own debts. Women do like responsible men.
2006-07-05 03:45:32 · answer #5 · answered by Cassie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, women can look past the whole living at home thing if you have a good reason for doing so and a plan on how to get the hell out of there. Second, depression over a breakup, regardless if you know it was the right thing, sucks and the only thing that will make it go away is time. You'll be all right man.
2006-07-05 03:44:15 · answer #6 · answered by JCS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello!!!!???!!!This is a fine example of where "perception" is everything. 10000 is peanuts to be in debt making 35000 per year and no kids???????? Wanna trade?????? I will take your debt and you take mine...AND you live at home for free????? What a deal!!!!!!!!Alleluhia...can I have your life????????
And gee...I kinda um really like my life. YOU are just fine!
Get out and enjoy my friend....you don't have any REAL problems. And if you want to pay that debt faster get another part time job too...doing something physical. My goodness....not a loser!
2006-07-05 03:46:57 · answer #7 · answered by rachel_waves 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Life is full of obstacles no matter who you are. Face them bravely will bring you reward beyond imagination. Your mistakes are your ultimate teacher. Step back you will see yourself better. Make a plan ahead will bring you a more control, freedom life.
Feeling down is a good experience because you want to get back up again. Life is not about winning or losing....It is about how meaningful to yourself. Tiny dirt in your eyes should not making you weep the rest in your life... Just blow them away gently, ha ha!
2006-07-05 03:53:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont sweat it , everyone needs a lil help from time to time and in a lil bit you will be back on track , if a girl likes you wether you live at home or in a swinging bachelor pad she likes you , anyone who dislike the fact that you live with your parents is girl you dont need, cause its a temporary thing its not lik eyou have never leave the nest , so just chill and do what you can
2006-07-05 03:48:31 · answer #9 · answered by yamarider 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't feel that way. I'm 28, and from experience, I can tell you that a woman you would meet in which would not understand your situation of living at home, is a woman who is not worthy our time and effort.
Don't give up, there is hope!
2006-07-05 03:43:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋