My boyfriend & I have been dating for almost 6 months and he initiated the exclusive part of the relationship about a month after we started dating. From the beginning, he has made it very clear that he is hard to get to know and doesn't want marriage or children, etc. His last serious relationship was about 5 years ago (that relationship was rocky, etc) He has introduced me to all his friends and family (his family even lives about 3 hrs away) yet he has no interest in meeting my friends or family. Since day one, our relationship has been mostly communicating via emails or texts, and seeing each other 1-2 times per week. Sometimes it will be a few days when I don't hear from him. Our bday is the same day and we went on a weekend beach trip for it. WE had agreed not to buy each other anything yet he bought me the iPod I wanted as a surprise. Here's my problem: I am falling in love with him and he has told me that he does not know if he can love anyone. What do I do?
2006-07-05 02:10:51 · 14 answers · asked by beautifully broken 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thanks to all of you for your input! I'd like to add that I definitely don't push him on anything (I don't like that either.hehe) I want to let you know that we are pretty equal on levels..I am not looking to get married or have kids either, so that part doesn't bother me. We share all expenses usually for dates, etc. However, the iPod gift was a pleasant surprise and a very nice gift for someone who isn't serious about things, I guess I am just confused b/c he has been honest and our relationship changed based on his actions. I had no expectations of meeting friends/family, but he has initiated that and the gift thing. That seems more serious, albeit, it was a pleasant surprise!! But, it is becoming increasingly difficult to remain "unserious" for me. I think those actions are serious, yet, he continues to tell me he doesn't want a serious relationship. I know that if I did tell him how I felt, he'd probably get scared. He tends to get distant at times.
2006-07-05 02:28:42 · update #1
Go more by his actions than his words.
2006-07-05 02:13:35 · answer #1 · answered by sunshine25 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like he was honest with you. He told you upfront that he didn't want to be married or have children. You cannot go now and ask him to change his tune. Well.. you can, but don't be surprised if he walks away if you do. If you want more, you'll have to wait for him to come around and it may never happen. He seems to care for you (an ipod is a very nice gift). So I'd leave it alone. If he has had a bad relationship in the past, it'll probably take him forever to come around to love and trust again. Don't push him to say he loves you. If you push too hard, he'll say it, but won't mean it and you'll be disappointed. If he does, he'll come out with it eventually.
2006-07-05 02:19:28 · answer #2 · answered by scubalady01 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you guys have completely different views on marriage, love,etc. it's not gonna work. I'm not gonna tell you what you should do. but this is what i would do if i was in your position, i would get out before i was in too deep. i wouldn't wait around for him to change, cos then i'll just end up frustrated waiting forever. If he's so interested in you he'd want to meet your friends and family so that he can get their approval as well. you deserve better, he doesn't sound like he makes much of an effort. and material things don't mean a thing if you not getting what you need from him emotionally.
2006-07-05 02:22:39 · answer #3 · answered by HoneyZ2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not Bipolar..... the conventional Bipolar differences mood purely a pair of times a year..... people confuse mood with emotion..... mood encompasses potential factor, sexual urge for nutrition, emotional reaction (which emotions you sense and how strongly), sleep kinds, urge for nutrition, cognitive ability, sociability, creativity, or maybe actual wellbeing. In a classic individual this stuff are truly strong yet when you're Bipolar you swing from one end of the spectrum to the different. the conventional individual with Bipolar sickness purely swings a pair of times a year.
2016-10-14 03:36:36 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well first ill say.. that thats really cute. really really, that you guys have the same birthday and went on a little vacation... and that he took you to meet his friends and family.
but.. just because he told you he doesnt know that he can fall in love again doesnt mean he cant. his relationship before was rocky, as you said, so it probably hit him pretty hard, and he probably spent alot of time trying to get all of the hard stuff out of his head.so now, its just going to be alittle hard for him to trust and to love again.. its definatly not impossible. you just have to be patient
2006-07-05 02:16:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a very hard stage in life well if he saids that he doesnt want to love anyone then theres something bothering him that happened in the past. you have to show him hes ur world and that youll do anything to show him dat tell him u have true feelings for him and if you could you would give him the world in a heartbeat.
2006-07-05 02:16:23 · answer #6 · answered by loca_baby_4u 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because it's like you Women. You want to be treated like women in the work place but given equal payment to men. It's not fair!
2006-07-05 02:12:46 · answer #7 · answered by rm2kdark_lord 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
since u just falling 4 him,end yo frendship b4 u find yo self madly in luv,tell him how u feel & y u have to end yo frendship,maybe he mite realise he feels something 4 u as well.
2006-07-05 02:18:55 · answer #8 · answered by lady x 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like he isnt commited,play hard to get
2006-07-05 02:15:39 · answer #9 · answered by joanne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u should take some more time... before u decide anything...
sometime its take time to understand....people
2006-07-05 02:20:00 · answer #10 · answered by zee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋