2006-07-05 01:12:18 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
what's the difference between p*ssy and parsley?
nobody eats parsley.
2006-07-05 02:35:01 · answer #1 · answered by }pixie{ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.
The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"
The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"
2006-07-05 08:15:50 · answer #2 · answered by wallablack 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pedro got into some trouble he ended up on probation for 60 days. He had to visit his probation officer every Tuesday @ EXACTLY 1 p.m. he kept the first 2 appointments, then was late 2 times in a row. He tried to explain to his probation officer that the problem was he could never find a parking space close by. He was told he better Pray he finds one next time or he will spend his remaining probation time in jail. So next Tuesday came and Pedro is circling the parking lot in front of the courthouse, he circles and circles Praying and Praying over and over again ..."Please God help me, I promise I will stop drinking, I will stop cussing...PLEASE GOD help me, I cant go to jail I need to find a parking spot..please please please" As he comes around the 4th time there in the center is an open spot he quickly looks to the heavens and says " Never mind...I found one "!
2006-07-05 08:25:17 · answer #3 · answered by shark38dd 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
internet nerd sex talk!?
im going to take you home and yahoo all night long! flip you over and stick it in your AOL! and google all over the place!
has this ever happened to you? you get on a elevator with 7 people. your going from the 1st floor to the 10th?
and the elevator stops on the 4th and who is on the other side? you got it ( fat ***! ) you can see the look of horror on eveyones face! when he steps on the elevator it even shakes! you start asking eveyone what there weight is! *( how much you weigh?) how much you weigh lady! and now is not the time to be lieing about your weight!) And to make it worse! people are still trying to follow the fat *** on the elevator! and your like hey hey hey! i know the elevator says 10 people or 1700 lbs but, pay close attention! we have a mathamatical delima! for you all who remember your algibra! we do not know the value of X
2006-07-05 08:17:53 · answer #4 · answered by perfect_demise 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A survey was taken of 5000 people. They were asked if English should be the official language in the United States. 55% said yes and the other 45 % said,"no hablo engles,senor."
2006-07-05 08:33:51 · answer #5 · answered by loufedalis 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A man is driving his five year old to a friend’s house when another car races in front and cuts them off, nearly causing an accident. "Douchebag!" the father yells. A moment later he realizes the indiscretion, pulls over, and turns to face his son. "Your father just said a bad word," he says. "I was angry at that driver, but that was no excuse for what I said. It was wrong. But just because I said it, it doesn’t make it right, and I don’t ever want to hear you saying it. Is that clear?" His son looks at him and says: "Too late, douchebag."
2006-07-09 08:20:26 · answer #6 · answered by Wolfie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I call this one How Hell froze over.
Once, a gay man went to heaven. At the Great Gate, Saint Peter was waiting for him. After rewieving his records Saint Pete decided to let him in. "Follow me" he said, opening the gate and walking in.
After some walk, Saint Pete's keys accidentally fell on the ground. Unaware, he bent over to pick up the keys. That was something the gay man just couldn't resist, so he jumped on him and did his thing.
Saint Pete was furious.
"If you do that again, You'll go straight to hell! But follow me, we're almost there."
After some more walk, Pete dropped his keys again, and again, the gay man jumped on him. Saint Pete was even more furious than before, but decided to give the gay guy one last chance.
Again they walk and for the third time Pete drops his keys, so he bends over and picks them up. The gay guy, having no self control jumps on him. Pete is now fed up and sends the gay guy straight to hell.
A few weeks later, Saint Pete goes down to hell for his routine inspection, but this time something is wrong, it is freezing, no fire, no lava and in one corner, he finds the devil lying under a stack of blankets freezing his *** of.
"Why is it so god damn cold down here? "Pete asks.
"Well you just try bending down for firewood!!" The devil replied.
2006-07-05 13:28:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What will you do if a tiger chases you when you are riing a motorbyke?
put the left indicator and turn right.
2006-07-05 08:21:14 · answer #8 · answered by tinku x 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you know the joke about the bed...? I can't tell you-- it hasn't been MADE UP yet!
2006-07-05 09:36:48 · answer #9 · answered by cdf-rom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just give me the ten points you big huckin chicken!
2006-07-07 19:24:49 · answer #10 · answered by MELISSA&ERIC 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋