When I was 24 I became pregant with my fiance. Well things did nto work out and we slpit before our daughter was born. My family ragged on me and told me I should be so ashamed for having a child before I was married. My broother and law looked at me night and said how stupid could you be to get pregnant before you were married. The **** never stopped with my family. I was a shame to my family. I cried my best friend former roommate crying and telling her how my family treats me because I am pregnant. My sister was also a roommate back with me and my friend I called. My friend new how hurt I was and broke a promise she would never tell. When my sister was 19 she had an abortion. My friend went with her. One night we were all sitting at my moms and I was getting the lecture from my bro in law about being stupid. It took all I had to hold it back about my sis abortion. My mom was so ashamed of me she would not allow a baby shower for me. I finally told my mom about my sis abortions.
2006-07-04 21:13:53 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It was not a big deal my sis had an abortion because she at least new better then to shame the family. I hurt not having a baby shower. Somone had one planned and my mom put a stop to it.. She said she was so ashamed and embarrassed that I did not deserve to have a baby shower. It was ok for my sis to kill a child but not ok for me to have one before I was married. Do you think I am making a big deal over nothing? And should I just get on with life evern when they throw it in my face how I could not even get my childs father to marry me and that my child is a basturd. I love my daughter more then life itself. But she is not treated like my sister kids because she was married when she had her two, even though she had an abortion.
2006-07-04 21:17:28 · update #1
SHe will be 12 in agust and have raised her on my own since birth.
2006-07-04 21:22:31 · update #2
I the question I worded wrong. I am now 36 going on 37 and I kept my child. my sister had the abortion. Abortion never crossed my mind............
2006-07-05 18:41:18 · update #3
Wow..I am so sorry that your family has treated you this way.They are wrong and have no right to act like that towards you.
1st off thanks for choosing to not have an abortion:)
You made the right choice and you sound like you love your precious Daughter very much,as I am sure she loves you.
Your family is missing out on a great child but that is their loss.
You made the right choice and if your family cannot show you some respect and love then that is their issue.
Keep loving your daughter as her love is more than any other person, family or not can give you.
Stay strong. :)
2006-07-04 21:25:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
No offense, but don't bother listening to a single word your parents said. Having a child is a wonderful thing, and an amazing experience, tho it's also by far one of the most excruciating experiences as well. Yes, you made a big mistake by having a child before marriage, but that doesn't instantly turn you into a total monster or anything. Your parents should be far more loving and forgiving, and it's sad and hurts to hear how they're treating you and your daughter. An abortion is certainly not the answer to this...think about it, why should an innocent child have to die just because it's an inconvience or a mistake? I was a mistake, and i was supposed to be aborted. To deny that child a life and to grow up and live and love just because of one stupid mistake is insane. And then to put you and her through all this suffering is beyond comprehension. I am very sorry to hear that your parents have done this, and that your fiance left you, but i pray to God that you would not deny this child life and that you would be strong and loving, both to your parents and your daughter. I pray everything works out well for you and your family.
2006-07-04 21:26:58 · answer #2 · answered by matrix_fister 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you realise how strong you are? Having your child knowing that you were going to be a single mother. I don't know you or your family, but from what i have read your family is seriously lacking in respect for you. For your mother to stop your baby shower and to resent you for your decision and still to this day, it is a sad thing to read. It is simple. You said that you love your daughter. Imagine what you would have missed out on if you had chosen not to have your daughter. Probally everything. As hard is it may be, move on with YOUR life. Forget what they think because you know that you made the right decision. You are a grown women who seems intelligent. Live a wonderful life with you and your daughter. Good Luck
2006-07-04 21:31:25 · answer #3 · answered by okay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who cares what they say. You have to be independent and take care of you and be responsible for the actions you take. Personally, I was taking risks at becoming pregnant when i was a teen and if I did get pregnant I would have had to suck it up and raise my child...My mom had an abortion and I wished I would have known my brother/sister. I wouldn't ever give my child up to the pressures of negativity from family or friends, or financial hardships. Things always work out if your willing to be strong and go with the bumps in the road. Tell your family they need to stop with the judging crap...You're supposed to support and love each other. If they can't get over it then don't be a victim to their drama and get on with your life away from them. Take care.
2006-07-04 21:26:53 · answer #4 · answered by nonyabusiness 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's really up to your own morals, and every mother's moral.
I myself am pro-choice, but I would not necessarily make that decision. I don't know if I would make that decision, it depends on the circumstances.
If you're a pregnant teen, and you go through with that pregnancy, there's such a high chance that you and your kid would go through poverty. Abortion, even though it might seem horrible, would save both of you from that sort of depression, even thought it might seem a little morbid.
I think it's awful that your family thinks that way about you, but if you're really sure that that was the right thing for you, then that's the right thing for you, and you should try to make that clear to them.
2006-07-04 21:19:38 · answer #5 · answered by huh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Single Mom! Aborthins can cause damage to your body, and also have phycological problems once you have had one. Many women regret having an abortion. You will find someone who will love you and your child! Trust in God. He loves both you and your family. He can forgive any sin, whether it be lying, or killing. Your sisters child is up in heaven. His promise is that if anyone belives in Him, and asks for Him to enter into their lifes He will! I will keep your family in my prayers. P.S. if you decide that you cannot keep the child there are many people who can't have children, and would love to adopt!
2006-07-04 21:21:56 · answer #6 · answered by xstitchalanna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a single parent is definately difficult and can't imagine how I would survive without the support of my family. Thank God I have that. However, one thing that keeps me to strive to be the best mom that I can be is the fact that my biological mom abandoned me when i was seven and my brother was only three. And my youngest son who is only eight (love him with all my heart) shares my dream to one day own a ranch a safe place for single moms to come and stay until they are able to be out on their own. As being a single mom who is fortunate to have support feel for those who don't. However, always remember that those who are choosing to not be there for you and your daughter it is their loss not yours and as long as you show your daughter the right way to love and care she to will grow up to be a successful adult. Who will pass on what you teach her to her own children. As when life gets hard I remember how my step parents took me in when they didn't have to. And even now on a smaller scale have single moms stay with me for short periods of time to give them the support they need when their parents are selfish and turn their backs on them.
2006-07-04 21:28:37 · answer #7 · answered by loriegusjd3 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
abortion is murder, you are taking the higher road. Yes it will be hard and tough, but you are doing what is right. Your sister should feel shame and all of your family for not loving you and supporting you in your time of need. Let they who are without sin cast the first stone. They are all hypocrites, they are not perfect. That child needs to feel love and support. If you have to do it on your own. so be it. But you are to be loved and so is your child. They are hypocrites!!!
2006-07-04 21:22:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As soon as you're able to, move. You and your daughter don't deserve that type of verbal abuse from your family.
You need to put your foot down and tell them that you're not going to raise your daughter in the hateful environment that they've created, and until they can accept the both you, then you have no other choice than to severe all ties with them.
2006-07-04 21:22:17 · answer #9 · answered by luckyducky121966 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
single mom...u shouldn't get rid of a child..b.c ur relationship didn't work out..or ur family would be ashamed..it's not the babies fault..it deserves to live...just b.c it's growing in YOUR body doesn't give u the right to kill another living being.. u should respect ur body...if u can't handle a child..putit up for adoption...and keep in contact... if the child grows up to hate u..atleast he/she is still living..-there's nothing more precious than life
2006-07-04 21:20:11 · answer #10 · answered by 1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋