Okay so my sister and I are really close and tell eachother everything... but the problem is we are both close to our dad and when I tell her something even if it can have devastating effects on my life if other people knew she goes off and as soon as she can tells our dad. And then I find out that he knows and everything gets awkward. Like for example *this didnt happen but its similar to what she told. Say we went to Las Vegas for a bachlorette party and my boss was there... and he hit on me and we didnt have sex but kissed and he wanted me to be his mistress... and I disclosed this to my sister in confidence that she wouldnt say a word knowing that I am in a relationship of 6 years and that it would have devastating effects on it. So she takes this info and within 12 hours indulges into a conversation about it with our father who now... hates my boss and is acting awkward towards me and believes that the newest strand of cranky arguements with my bf are bc Im with my boss.(not true)
2006-07-03
17:06:37
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17 answers
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asked by
I know best
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Family & Relationships
➔ Family
FYI: I spoke with my sister regarding how her blabbing would really cause problems and she promised SWORE on my parents lives she wouldnt say a thing. And that's the only reason I told her. She was very convincing that she wasn't telling a soul bc she knew it wasnt something to be said. Im thinking everything might just blow over and that I should just let it go and forget that anyone even knows and plus like a few of you said I am grown, Im an adult and I don't/shouldnt have to worry about what others think... it's my life anyway. And I shouldn't have to explain anything to anyone because again it's my life not theirs. I mean it's hard bc I am close with my dad and I usually tell him everything but this... was to stay a secret. And my sister is not to be trusted again.
2006-07-03
17:27:03 ·
update #1
Surely God put you into my path today, after I saw your question and read it all.
I JUST WENT THROUGH SOME VERY UNFORGIVING AND HURTFUL EXPERIENCES MYSELF ABOUT MY DAD AND MY SISTER WHO TALKED ABOUT ME BEHIND MY BACK.
I can relate to what you are going through and first know YOU CANT TELL YR SISTER EVERYTHING BECAUSE SISTERS CAN ALSO BE JEALOUS AND DO THINGS TO HURT YOU . It is true it happens. She should not be talking to your dad, but like my sister did too, about things that wre only to damage my relation to my dad and in fact did damage it and i never recovered from that. My dad died and I was there for his last days , while being very ill and he did notsay much to me, though he was unable to speak much, I later found out that my sister had beewn telling my dad to get me out of his house andmind.
It is very difficult to be direct and objective about this situation. But you can do it. You can be direct and tell your sister "she is dead wrong" and you resent this. It has hurt you. And you confided in her.
But now you know better, right? you won't disclose anything to yr sister, unless you want to get a s bad a situation as I was thrown into with my beloved dad.
YOu dont have to justify anything to anybody, and you do not need to be put through hell or more discomfort. But you have to stop it. And be prepared for surprises, my sisters beat me up even when I am very weak and dieing of a terminal illness that i've had since i was b orn.
You will be surprised at how sometimes sisters do not really act like sisters.
See if you can recover the friendship back though. But that yr sister knows you dont approve of what she did at all.
Good Luck.
2006-07-03 17:46:22
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answer #1
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answered by noteparece? 4
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this is extremely no longer your company to inform them. it really is your sisters previous and also you would possibly want to enable her settle on on a thanks to address it. If she needs to talk with you about it then she will be in a position to, if she does no longer then why would you pressure it upon het? i'm guessing that you have not in any respect had an abortion, that is a really painful aspect to address. that is her scar enable her heal that scar in her personal time. you're an wide kin yet i comprehend for a incontrovertible reality that you do not tell your spouse and youngsters about all of your alternatives and they do no longer income this both. I comprehend that you've been employing her old computing gadget yet I also comprehend that you had to were searching by her archives to locate that paper. Why would you study her papers? i imagine you want to stumble on the fashion to allow it pass. As you stated this is been 11 years so why is this even a situation anymore? Why would you study something on her computing gadget she allowed children use from college? She has moved on from that mistake she made, what elements the right to deliver it back up? because your her sister? the in straight forward words aspect your intitled to as her sister is to be there for her even as she desires you and IF she chooses to percentage those issues with you. this is no longer your company so do not act like that is. the in straight forward words way your moms and dads will locate out you knew is in case you instructed someone that you probably did this and extremely i'd be ashamed to inform all people I did what you probably did. end judging human beings in accordance to their mistakes incredibly your sister. Your pretty a lot thirty, i'm 19 and that i believe like I study a tale of a fifteen 3 hundred and sixty 5 days old. you would possibly want to comprehend extra efficient then to be appearing that way, advance up. do not reason a kin affair because of something you do not have part of contained in the first position. i'm certain if the tables were became you'll experience thoroughly betrayed by your sister if she ever did what your conserving is you're taking under consideration doing.
2016-11-30 06:17:24
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answer #2
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answered by Anonymous
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Deny everything and don't trust ur sis anymore, and hey, tattle on her. I know it's hard to keep juicy secrets, that's why I ask people to specify if it's a secret or not, unless it's a no-brainer, but asking never hurts. Things will blow over with ur dad in time...it's ur life, he has no say, and if ur bieng a good gf, ur bf shouldn't have a problem either. If ur sis can't keep her mouth closed, don't put anything in her ear which will come out of her mouth, that u don't want others knowing. Apparently she doesn't see the dangers of letting ur secrets out...or she doesn't care...maybe she thinks letting daddy in on ur juicy secrets will get her points and he'll favor her more than he favors u. good luck, don't trust sis anymore.
2006-07-03 17:14:43
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answer #3
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answered by Uncertain Soul 6
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well your sister proved that she can't keep any secrets. So don't tell her any secrets. Instead find another family member, rather its an aunt, an uncle, a cousin, or even tell one of your best friends one that you know will never say anything. And tell them the secret. Try talking to your dad to, after all thats what parents are for.
2006-07-03 17:21:08
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answer #4
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answered by poohbear 3
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I have six sister.I am the eldest of the six.I have 1 sister who could not hold water. The rest of my sibling knew that to. We could not tell her our secret. We love our sister.But we knew she was not going kept our secret like we kept hers. All this to tell you. You going to have to stop telling your sister your secret.You going to have to find someone who you can share with.Just because you don't share secret doesn't mean you don't love her.P.S. You keep sharing secret,it will be hard on your relationship with your sister.You can only take so much.Loose the rope and not tell her any more secret.You do that you will have a great relationship with your sister.
2006-07-03 17:31:40
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answer #5
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answered by 40something 2
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Try not to tell her your secrets anymore. If you know thats not going to happen then you should talk to your sister about her blabber mouth ways. You should honestly tell her how you feel about her telling your dad about your private life. I have 3 sisters, two of which I am very close to. I would feel really betrayed if they did anything of the sort to me, and if they did I would totally bring it up with them and let them know that I don' trust them as much as I used to.
2006-07-03 17:15:38
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answer #6
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answered by lostandconfused 2
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Try not to tell her anymore secrets. If you do she will more than likely tell them. Just try and stick it out with the bf and tell the boss the truth. G/L!!!! Don't try and keep stuff from her. Tell your dad what REALLY happened. Maybe he will understand.
2006-07-03 17:09:54
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answer #7
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answered by jennjenn09 2
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I would hold off telling her anymore secrets.
If she asks why you do not tell her anything anymore explain it to her, honestly and to the point.
She will have to earn your trust back again.
I will also sit down and talk to your father and explain the whole situation.
Good Luck.
2006-07-03 17:16:31
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answer #8
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answered by tjrj23 4
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Tell her only what you know can't come back to haunt you. And find a new job. Your boss is a pig.
2006-07-03 17:12:19
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answer #9
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answered by notyou311 7
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well...obviously, you can't trust your sister now. OR you could just confront her and tell her the problem and maybe she'll understand. I would go with the latter as this method often works out with my siblings although I, myself, often reveals their secrets to everybody. (I don't do it anymore though because it disappointed them)
2006-07-03 17:13:29
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answer #10
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answered by Anonymous
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