Do narcissistic men not process thoughts the same as "normal"people? Mine had very poor communication skills.

Question

He had a difficult time expressing himself, so basically he didn't ,which left me frustrated most of the time.He would take things I said wrong quite often which would contribute to his anger which he surpressed until I figured him out and then I saw his RAGE!WOW. When people on this site talk about seeing and hearing the devil I know what they are talking about. It totally blew me away. I had only seen very tiny pieces of it during our 6 years together, but once he wanted out of the relationship all Hell broke loose on his part. I kept asking him "Who are you ?" "Where is the man that was my "soulmate"? He coldly said to me "He's GONE man"! I can still hardly believe 6 months later that this has happened . And he is still extremely cold to me like everything was my fault. He will never let me say anything -he just cuts me off mid sentence and saysNO- AM NOT TALKING ABOUT IT !He acts like a child, I never realized how immature he was until we split.I guess thats because he hid it .

Answer 1

No mentally ill person processes thought on the same way a non-mentally ill person does. The only NPD I have known (and this personality disorder is rare) did not exhibit rage.
No one on this site has identified themselves as a psychiatrist, and only a really good psychiatrist could diagnose this disorder. It's dangerous to start playing doctor. If you want to read about NPD, go to : http://www.angelfire.com/ego/narcissism/
It has nothing to do with combing hair and looking suave, in my humble opinion.

Answer 2

I read your other questions - if I didn't know any better, I'd swear you were dating my ex-boyfriend. We should talk! To answer your question though, no they do not process thoughts or actions the way most "normal" people would. Reason being - they aren't normal in the first place. They are selfish, a**holes who only think of themselves. I think you knew all along (deep inside) that he was immature but you also probably loved him which is why you didn't see it until the relationship was over. Atleast that's how it was for me after my relationship ended after 6 years. I could finally see the mental abuse he put me through. I kept thinking it was me and all along, it was HIM! I was never on the outside looking in. If you are truly over with this man, I would run...and run away fast. Don't look back and stop asking questions about narcissistic men - he's still controling you somewhat - sorry, but he is. I can see that it still bothers you by all the questions you post about narcissism. Take what you've learned and move on - you're obviously better off with out him.

Answer 3

Whoooah! Never thought that I would encounter someone else who had been in a similar relationship. When I FIRST met the guy I was with, he would comb his hair everytime we entered a store. At first I thought - ok, maybe the wind did blow his hair. THEN I noted that he did it EVERYTIME, even if there was NO wind!

The thing that I note your ex & mine have in common is that they appear NON-supportive, or am I speaking out of turn? (I apologize if I am).
The difference is that I am still on good terms with my ex, but I would NEVER go back.
From what I experienced, he felt as tho the world revolved around HIM. Example, if he saw a young guy who had a funky haircut, he would always remark out loud something like, "Oh look at that freak.." I would always remind him that we are all different, and that is what gives life its flavor.

Interesting because out of all the dozens of guys I dated, he was the only one that I lived with in a common-law status & actually felt married to. THEN I found myself asking - "WHO IS this guy that is sitting across me?" He is NOT the same guy I met a year ago!
You know, it is interesting, and I would bet that your guy had issues with either BEING or FEELING abandoned. Mine did.
My heart goes out to you.

Answer 4

To a narcissistic man everything IS your fault. They take no responisbility for anything. They really do assume that the world needs to stop for them. They genuinely don't get it when it doesn't.

Answer 5

Narcissists are incapable of accepting responsibility for their actions. They are easily angered and frustrated, and this results in violent outbursts (as you described). They definitely have problems communicating unless "it is all about them".
Stay away from narcissists, their behaviour is "crazy making".

Answer 6

get out before you get mangled