my mom dictates who I'm friends with. whats a good way to get her to stop?

Question

who I'm friends with, how I relate to them when she tells me I can't be friends with them (dodge eye contact, nod curtly when made, don't talk to her because I'm mad at her parents), who I can look or smile at (like a cute little kid in a restaurant if he's annoying her). She controls way too much of my life this is just a small part. She needs to back off!

I'm fourteen, she's strict, how do I respectfully but firmly tell her to give me some space?

Answer 1

Mom's are pretty smart people, and they actually do have your best interests in things that they do.


I OWE MY MOTHER

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so! that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Answer 2

I had a chum many years in the past. She has 2 females on the time the eldest became 10 and her youngest 8. My daughter on the time became also 8. If my daughter did not do as she became instructed i'd chastise her, she don't have treats or i'd deliver her to mattress early. My chum's little ones would turn round and call her a *****. She'd supply them a large whack on their face and that i'd shy away. yet they'd keep on. The eldest used to call her a sl@g, sl ut and wh0re and the youngest observed in her footsteps. Her "angels" as she would call them were finished brats! they'd even backchat to me and call me the names. i'd not stand for it and instructed them. The chum did not like this in any respect, yet when i did not stand for it from my personal baby why stand for it from someone elses???? many cases I had to chew my lip and make an excuse to leave her domicile. I also stopped calling round and began to make excuses even as she wanted to visit. It became extremely undesirable. I talked about this chum some months in the past and we chatted. I requested how the kin became and the subsequent minute the youngest baby (now 14) got here to visit wanted money off her and in view that she became speaking and not in any respect paying too a lot interest the little brat rotated and stated "Oh for f*cksake mom, purely supply me a f*cking tenner so i am going to get my f*cking make up, your'e a tw@t face once you do not pay interest to me f*cking (sisters call) receives what she f*cking needs and me, i have were given to f*cking wait, you sl@g". She did not say something in any respect, purely laughed. i became gobsmacked, and walked away. If my daughter spoke to me like that she'd do it the once and not in any respect not in any respect back. My daughter is not any angel, do not get me incorrect, yet she knows how a options she will be in a position to pass earlier she receives a grilling/grounded and her invaluable computer or telephone is confiscated.

Answer 3

HOney, just be glad that your mother cares enough about you to be concerned. Today, it seems like children your age are allowed to do whatever they want, actually a lot of parents are afraid of their children since they can cause so much trouble with the law if they are spanked. Sit down with your mother, thank her for being such a caring and concerned mom, that you know a lot of mothers don't care but that you are getting older now and need a little more freedom than she is giving you. That you want to have your own friends, but if she knows something or see something that you need to know about them to let you know and you will make the right decision, that she needs to trust you. Good luck girl.

Answer 4

You're Mom is right. She should be strict. Keep your mouth shut and earn her respect then and only then will she give you more freedom. My God you're only 14, and you think you know it all and want the freedom of an adult. You'll get the freedom when you pay your own rent, then you can do what you want. Until then shut up and do like you're told. You think your Mom's strict. Wait until you start to work and see what your Boss is like. You'll appreciate your Mom then and I hope you let her know. Keep a diary so you will have a record of how immature you were. Just keep listening to Mom and you will grow up. If you don't listen, you'll wind up like the rest of the losers.

Answer 5

Sorry but I'm with your Mom on this one. We have to be strict & all up in your business. Look what happens when parents don't pay attention...Columbine ring a bell?? Just this morning my daughter walked in the living room & "reminded" me that in just over a month she'll be 14. I'm guessing she was making sure she had another super party like every other year, but she just said it & left the room. And you expect us to understand you?? LOL Just be glad you have a Mom that loves you enough to care.

Answer 6

Well she has a right to know who are your friends. But not to pick them If they have a bad reputation then she has a right to talk to u about it. But as far as the rest your mom has some issues if she tell u not to talk to some one because she is mad at their parent then she needs to grow up. I would talk to her and tell her she needs to look in the mirror and to think about some of the things that she does that effects your life.

Answer 7

I think that you are very lucky to have a mom that cares. She is trying to protect you and you should thank God everyday that she is like that. My guess is that if were to stop rebelling it against it, 2 things would happen. You would realize that it isn't that bad ( and maybe your mom is right about some of your choices of friends) and your mom may back off a little because you are cooperating.

Answer 8

Honasty.But.first off, you are her baby and regardless of wether you want to believe it or not, when you get older and have kids, you will do the same things. Maybe not as bad but watch and see. Anyway if you just sit down and repectfully talk to her, you'll be surprised how much she's willing to back off. Ok maybe just back up..lol sorry its a mom thing.

Answer 9

chop her up and put her in the freezer, nah just kidding, I know exactly what you mean , my mother was the same way, if she was watching tv and she didn't like someone on the show, you better never admit to liking them. she is dead now and I am grown so I don't have the problem any more. tolerence is about all you can do if you don't want to confront her about it. does she have an e-mail address, I will send her an e-mail and tell her to lighten up.

Answer 10

my mom was the same way i don't think there is away to make her stop try letting her know you can be trusted with them but if she already has a opinion of them i doubt that's going to work either sorry you only have 4 more years stick in there get through school and be happy

Answer 11

Tell her 2 trust you as a daughter.what she's doing means she doesnt trust you at all.ask her to think about how it'll feel if she was you and you were in control of her relationships.she cant love for you..a girl has to be happy and be with the man she loves.it's not your mum who's loving.tell her you have to be responsible and you are.she will let go sooner or later.